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Alaska Ravens

 

After having to put my desire for children on hold for almost 8 years, my fiancΓ© decided that he was ready to try for kids (he wasn't the man in my life for all 8 years, although I wish he could have been!).

Last possible date of conception was January 26, 2011. The reason I know that is because I used FAM (Fertility Awareness Method).

My first ultrasound was March 9th. I was crushed when the doctor revealed to me that I had what was called a blighted ovum. The best way I can describe that is a genetic miscarriage. There was something so wrong with the baby when the egg and the sperm met that the embryo didn't complete. I had an empty amniotic sac inside my body. I couldn't believe that without being pregnant I had tripped over $200 worth of home pregnancy tests. The doctor explained that the amniotic sac would have fooled my body into thinking it was pregnant. The doctor also said that my amniotic sac was not as far along as it should have been, as he was measuring from a conception date of two and a half weeks before the last possible date. He said to come back in a week, we would do another ultrasound and then discuss our options. I was crushed, but dealing with it.

A week later, there was some growth in the sac and a little lump had developed inside of it. The doctor told me to come in a week later and sent me on my way.

That weekend, I went to my local Fred Meyers to do a little shopping. I sat in my car and ate a pretzel with cheese. It was getting warm out and the day was sunny. Imagine my surprise when a large shiny black raven descended, landing between my driver side door and the vehicle next to me. I kept eating, but was having fun watching the raven hop around near my car. It's not often I get to see the ravens up close, and this was as good as it was going to get... I thought.

In about the span of time it took me to blink, five more ravens came swooping in, surrounding my car. My car was the only one in the center of the action, despite being surrounded by other vehicles.

The first raven hopped up on the hood of my car. He tilted his head from side to side, hopping back and forth. While normally ravens make a harsher croaking or caw, this raven was chirruping at me. That's the best way I can describe it. It was a soft little bird purr! When he came up and pecked on my windshield, I rolled down the window a smidge and tossed a piece of soft pretzel on the ground. While feeding the wildlife is probably not the best idea, they were eating other human food that they had acquired out of the dumpsters, so I figured, what would it hurt?

Alaska Ravens

Apparently the raven didn't care for my hand coming out of my window so he hopped back down to the ground. He skipped past the pretzel piece three or four times, and then scooted behind my car.

Then another raven hopped onto the hood of my car. At this point, I realized I wasn't the only person to notice what was happening. One of the parcel boys was rounding up carts nearby and seemed just as amazed as I did. But he was the only one. I did a quick survey of the parking lot. Even with the large crowd, no one seemed to be paying attention to what was happening. Either they couldn't see or they didn't care.

The second raven spotted the food I had tossed out, jumped down, retrieved it and perched himself back on the hood of my car. He also made the same soft little chirrup noises that the first bird made. While he ate, the raven kept his eye on me through the glass. When he had enough to eat, he dropped the bread and jumped onto my passenger side mirror, back onto my windshield (where I got the most amazing picture, and then flew off.

As I went about my day, I paid attention to how I felt. How the birds had behaved struck me as very odd and seemed to impart that there was more going on than I could see. But I felt calmer. Comforted. And everywhere I went there were always two or more ravens. Always.

At my next ultrasound, the doctor told me that he could see a fetal pole that was pulsing. That meant that my baby was still alive! I really was pregnant after all! The first ultrasound had just been too early to tell anything, and because the doc was basing his timing of my pregnancy of a different day his calculations for how far along I was were off. A lot!

I practically skipped out of the doctor's. I was so giddy with joy that I went to see a friend of mine. She grew up on a reservation in the lower 48 and is way more sensitive than I could hope to be. As we stood on the sidewalk in front of her business, I happened to look across the street. Perched on top of a street light were two of the biggest, blackest ravens I'd seen yet. I pointed these out to my friend. She told me that those were the first ravens she'd seen all day. She told me to do some research to see what I could find. The whole time we talked, the ravens stayed just across the street.

The next day I started digging around on the internet and came across something interesting. Ravens didn't always mean carnage and death. They meant mystery, the universe, the Creator, the ultimate recycler. The many different meanings of ravens made me smile. The raven is an air element, which would coincide with my birth sign as well. Another tidbit of information I gleaned was that you don't choose the raven as a totem animal. The raven chooses you. According to a couple of different websites I found, my baby would be born under the Raven sign.

As I was reading, I tried on the pieces of information. I discarded each like a shirt that almost fit but something just wasn't sitting right. When I saw that my baby would be born under the sign of the Raven, it hit me in the gut, chest, heart, whatever. The ravens weren't there for me. Not really. They were there for the baby! I really thought about all the times I had seen these beautiful birds. It was kind of freaky but I had to laugh because when I went to the stores to shop, they would take turns watching me like sentries.

The next weekend came and it was time to run some more errands. As I headed down the road I realized that over the course of the week, I'd been so tired that I hadn't really been out of the house and thusly hadn't seen my black-feathered companions in many days.

A couple miles down the road from where I live, both sides of the road are lined with lights, the kind that hang way over four-lane highways. As I approached this area, I had a "what the blazes?" moment. On each overhang were perched at least two ravens, but mostly three or four each. I had the morbid thought that it looked like a mourning of ravens. They were lined up like funeral mourners to watch my car drive by. Not one bird swooped off the lights, jumped around or pecked at it's fellow bird. They just watched. I was struck with the solemnity of it, but refused to consider the icky feeling I had deep in my gut.

After that, I didn't see them much anymore, but didn't think anything of it. Almost a week later, I went in for an emergency ultrasound. The doctor confirmed that I was having a miscarriage.

While the ravens don't seem as devoted as they did when I was pregnant, I still find them keeping an eye on me when I'm out of the house. Due to their representation of mystery, and thusly knowledge, when I see them now (usually when I'm upset and not in a "student" mindset), I ask myself what I could learn and remind myself to be open to new information and knowledge.

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Comments about this paranormal experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, dragonwalker, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Mace (3 stories) (15 posts)
 
3 years ago (2015-05-16)
I love this story! And I love ravens! I am very sorry for your loss, I had miscarriage last year and wouldn't wish that heart ache on anyone!

Ravens/crows have always had a "watch" over me as my mom described it, since I was a child. One funny incident was when I had broken up with my not very nice ex, he didn't believe in paranormal and when I told him about the ravens he laughed it off. Anyways after we broke up ravens started harassing his house! They would squawk very early every morning and wake him up, and scratch at his roof and "mock" him from his fence. I thought it was funny! 😁
dragonwalker (5 stories) (77 posts)
 
7 years ago (2011-05-31)
Gizzy: Thank you for the link and the information. If they stand for patience, that could be why they're everywhere I go right now. I have no patience. None. LOL. Have spent much of my life being a late bloomer. The only make-up I have for that is that when I "bloom", I do it all in one big push! So right now, I feel late blooming, kid-wise, which could be why I need to be patient!

Sis: I never heard anything at all. I checked in one day and she was up and gone. Is ok. There was a lot of comment board tussling going on before she left, and with her being the upfront and plain spoken person I love, she wasn't going to just let ignorance stand there. LOL.

Anyway, note pic that has now been added to story. Martin, the admin/mod guy ROCKS! Thanks, Martin!
Gizzy (3 stories) (71 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-26)
Sorry I meant to post this link for you to check out

Http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_depictions_of_spiders
Gizzy (3 stories) (71 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-26)
Hi Dragonwalker, nice to see you back. I am so sorry for your sadness but I do believe it was not meant to be this time, however when everything lines up correctly the time will be right for you, which I don't think will be long!. Thank you for sharing such a bittersweet story. Having looked on google at spiders I believe the message they are giving you is patience. This is one of the many things they are known for due to their hunting technique.
Loganz_sis (1 stories) (150 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-26)
Ahem...I know what I heard - WB is not here anymore, or anywhere else.

Tons of other people around, who love your stories and will help you with their kind words.
dragonwalker (5 stories) (77 posts)
 
7 years ago (2011-05-25)
DA - I go through spurts. Usually I come back in here when there's some freaky $h*t going on and a need for counseling arises. The fiance is great, but he doesn't believe. πŸ˜‰ BTW, does anyone know what happened to WB? Am feeling a need for her capitalization STRESS points!
Dan - Seriously, at this point, I'm starting to feel harrassed by the wildlife. Spiders in particular. I swear, EVERY TIME I turn around now, BAM. Except at work. I don't see any there. Just at home and in the car, etc. So I'm kind of freaking out.
To sis and watermoon, thank you for the love!
DeviousAngel (11 stories) (1910 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-25)
By the way, glad to see you posting again dragonwalker 😊 I'm still loving on that story about the ghost in the road...
watermoon (2 stories) (55 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-25)
In my opinion I believe this is such a beautiful story and what a journey you have come so far
I am truly sorry for your loss and hopefully you'll be able to concive again and have a beautiful baby.
Good luck and thank you for sharing 😁
Loganz_sis (1 stories) (150 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-25)
What can I say, it is by far one of the most sincerest stories I have read here.

I am sorry about what happened. I had never seen a raven until a few months ago... Saw them at the tower of London. They are definitely beautiful but there is something so eerie about them... You almost feel like they are surreal and as if no one else but you can see them!
DARKNESS (3 stories) (2022 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
Wow what an amazing story Dragon walker! Firstly sorry about your loss, but in the end you will be blessed with your Raven child! 😊 I have heard that Ravens are very smart if not the smartest bird around, the act that they made for you was very unique I would feel very blessed to have witnessed this. I have a strong feeling that you will witness similar events in the near future! Good luck to you! 😊

Thanks for sharing.

Dan
dragonwalker (5 stories) (77 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
DA! YAY! And I'm sure Peanut knew how much I loved him/her.
If this is the hardest thing I have to go through in my life, then I am very lucky! I was blessed with the knowledge that apparently, any child of mine will be gifted. Poor kid is going to get it coming and going, as the paternal side carries some as well!
Geetha and taz, thank you both.
Geetha, your mom and grandma sound very wise, indeed!

Hopefully YGS will be able to post the picture that I sent in for this story.
Has anyone else had some intense encounters with wildlife?
taz890 (12 stories) (1380 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
dragonwalker thankyou for sharing such a personal story, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
As others comments say I'm sure soon you will have the chance to love a baby and hold him/her in your arms

Bless you
Carl
geetha50 (15 stories) (986 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
Hi Dragon walker,
This story is definitely going into my favorites.
First of all sorry for the loss of your unborn child. My grandmother always told me that there is a reason for the Almighty to give something and take something. I personally believe that your unborn child was ready for the world and that is why He called him / her back to His house. The ravens were I believe a way of not just comforting you but a way of letting you know what was about to happen.
In our tradition, Ravens are considered one the smartest birds. It means strength, courage, and knowledge among other things. I think that the raven proved that in your case. Gave you the knowledge of it was about and also gave you the strength and courage to move on from your heartache.
My mom always told me that the Almighty may test His believers but never abandons them in a time of need. Sooner or later (hopefully sooner), you will have a beautiful angel to hold in your hands. God Bless!
DeviousAngel (11 stories) (1910 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
Thank you for sharing this very personal, very touching story. I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your unborn child. I am certain that your baby departed this world knowing how much you and its guardians loved it, and perhaps, that wonderful soul will return to you when the time is right.

I do see ravens occasionally, and I feel that they are messengers. I do not consider them to be good or evil. They are very wise, very observant creatures. I think they were watching over you and will continue to do so, regardless of whether or not you can see them.
dragonwalker (5 stories) (77 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
Otteer, it really is something to watch them go after the eagles, isn't it?!
It was very interesting to be chirrupped at. The only time I hear noises like that is when my cats are being affectionate and cuddly. I could almost swear they felt the loss of the baby as much as I did.
It sucked, but am not a mess about it. He giveth and taketh away, and that time He chose to do both in close succession. We know that our plumbing works, we know that it can happen so that takes a large weight off my mind.
Lately there's been a large influx of spiders every time I turn around. My hunny says that this year, there are a lot of spiders out. It could be that is what it is. Maybe for him. Right now it feels like a symbol of my creative energies. I have a healthy dislike of spiders, and I think seeing so many is kind of like a smack in the face. Something like a universal post-it to stop being afraid of what I can create and just DO it. Then again, maybe it's all what I make it. LOL. Thanks for the comment, sweets!
aiafaith1 (guest)
 
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
First of all, very sorry about your baby. 😭

Second, I see the point in your story. It made me want to believe that the ravens helped you out, but something told me in the back of my mind, "No." It was a nice story though. 😊
otteer (8 stories) (398 posts)
+4
7 years ago (2011-05-24)
Dragon walker,

What a wonderful story. I am so sorry for your loss.

Thanks for sharing all the information about the Raven and the beliefs surrounding them. I live in a Crow, Raven zone, I am privy to watching them daily, from baby crow to adult. The chirring usually occurswhen they are expressing affection, mom, dad to child, mom and dad talking and preening each other. Its touching. They are soooo smart too, I have watched them group and go after the local eagles when they are taking out their young to fish below our home. They then fly to the trees and talk about it like they are boasting, "that will teach em!"

I'm hoping once you and your fiance have recovered emotionally and your body and the Ravens are ready for a new baby you will have a healthy little Raven child to love. Bless you, this is going in my favs.

Much love ❀ ❀

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