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Is It My Mind Playing Tricks On Me?

 

It was a strange day for me on the whole; my body felt detached from the mind and soul.

I did some shopping on the way home and it was the first time in years I found myself struggling to carry five bags of shopping. The physical pain was unbearable, and mentally I just wanted to cry.

I managed to get home totally exhausted, arms shaking, tears streaming down my face, and the voice in my head saying "you are not going to win". All the way home I could feel his presence.

My students arrived at 6:45pm for their Yoga class. The lessons are for an hour. After mother and daughter had gone, I had a quick shower and plunked myself on the sofa and watched a bit of TV. Within half an hour or so I was ready for bed. As much as I wanted to stay up I just couldn't.

It was one of those nights again, where I was absolutely exhausted, but kept tossing and turning, one minute on the side, the next on the stomach, then the back, at one point I was lying diagonally on the bed.

Trying not to disturb Inca my kitty. I closed my eyes, and managed to drift off whether it was a dream or a vision I was having I remember everything clearly, but I suddenly opened my eyes, it was like I had been hit with a jolt if that makes sense and Inca woke at the same time.

My eyes immediately looked towards the bedroom door and it was the same direction Inca was looking also. There was a woman standing there, as soon as I saw her she disappeared.

She was dressed all in white, her hair was messy and her arms were above her head, it was as if she was going to pounce on to someone. As I said she vanished as soon as my eyes were on her.

I just lay there, looking at what was now an empty space, Inca remained in his Egyptian position for at least a minute but then settled down next to me this time he snuggled up to me.

I lay there just staring thinking what scary shiat I had seen on Television. The thing is I don't watch scary stuff.

My boyfriends coat is hanging on the door. I kept thinking it was the coat that freaked me out, but then how could it, the coat is black the woman was dressed in white. As I focused on the coat I think my eyes started playing tricks on me.

I thought I could see a shadow blending in with the coat. I decided to turn on to my side and of course I am facing the window.

I lay there looking out the window, trying to look past the scary images that were being formed by my fear. Inca then got up and decided to go lie by my feet again; she was curled up so I could feel her body next to my feet. I lay there closing my eyes and then opening them. I could feel and sense all kinds of things.

I could sense the presence of a male outside in the garden right next to the window. I turned around so I was lying on the other side, but then I started to hear things moving in the corner, so I turned to lie on my back, and lay looking at the ceiling.

Now bear in mind by this time, my heart was pounding so hard I am sure any faster and harder, it would have pounded out of my body!

I was getting very hot but to afraid to take the blanket off, I was actually sweating. I kept drifting in and out of sleep.

I was so scared sleep was just impossible. I looked at the clock and it 2345. I could not believe how quick the time was going. I turned to face the window again and for some odd reason I looked at my quartz wand, I stared at it and it appeared to have an eye

I tried to focus, but that is what I could see a big eye in the tip.

I closed my eyes and tried to think of happy thoughts but they would not come, fear seemed to cloud my each and every thought.

I heard the bells, those familiar bells, a calling, but to where, by who? My eyes stayed closed, then as before, I opened them quickly and looked straight out of the window.

Inca had sat bolt up as well and was staring out of the window also. I heard someone walking close to the window, the same footsteps I heard when I was 11 years old in India.

I just lay there paralyzed and listening shifting my eyes to Inca and the window. The next time I looked at the clock it was 330am, Inca was sitting by the bedroom door staring.

I called him, he did not move. I called twice, but he did not budge. I sat up in bed alert and cautiously looking around the bedroom, the feeling of uneasiness covered me like a blanket. I did not look towards the window, but kept my eyes on Inca.

I called once more and he jumped on to the bed. Another 2 hours I would have to get up for work. Totally exhausted, I closed my eyes, I drifted out to sleep listening to the purring of my little kitten.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Surya, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-24)
Eightgateslate65

Thank you for reading my story, the story about my trip to India and what happened to me is published on the site under the title of "Slapped By A Someone Or Noone-my Last Visit To India".
Eightgateslate65 (1 stories) (9 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-23)
Seems like a strange story (hi), and it sounded scary. There is something I would like for you to clarify for me. You said you heard the same footsteps you heard in India when you were eleven. I would like you to go more into depth about that particular piece of your experience. That seems to be blocking a truth of the matter that may have to do with something that wants to communicate with you. Thank you. -EGS 😁
Oglegen (6 stories) (61 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-21)
Where abouts in the UK are you Surya? We should meet. And now the comment box is insisting I should fill up 43 characters la la la la la la la
Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-21)
Oglegen thank you for reading my story I will let you know how I get on. I have tried the breath but give it another go.
Oglegen (6 stories) (61 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-21)
That sounds like my average night while sleeping alone... Without the woman in white with the hands above her head - that would completely freak me out!

I think Hoochler and Tonith have given you some great advice, and I personally believe that you need to feel justified in your own head about why you should NOT be kept awake at night and be scared of these things. When I have my night-time terrors, where I can sense presences, hear voices and feel touches, I make a decision to be agressively rational about everything. Night-time for me, is no time to believe in demons/spirits/ghosts. I'd say I act like an atheist at night time if I want to get any sleep!

Read a Richard Dawkins book before bed (I have stayed in his house before, and believe me, there are no spirits or ghosts there, they are put off by the complete indifference to them!) Like you would to someone threatening or persistent who approached you on the street, continue to dismiss them from your mind, visualise yourself dismissing them in your head, look sarcastically upon them and concentrate on one thought. It doesn't have to be a happy or "universal love" thought. You can just concentrate on your breath and continue to dismiss, dismiss, dismiss them like a pesky wasp.

Tell us how you get on.
Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-21)
Hoochler my aura has been sick for a while. My Crystals will remain where they are, as I said it was just the quartz wand obviosuly picked up a negative energy but I will sort this out. I am through the yoga balancing, healing and uniting the mind body & soul, as I have been very detached lately. The process will be slow as other things have come to light now. Thank you for the advice I really appreciate it. I will try the modified aura technique.
KL (2 stories) (22 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-21)
hmmm... I think what you need to do if you want to suppress sensing entity is to divert your mind away from those things. Try to close your eyes and slowly isolate the sounds or other external inputs. Listen only to your thoughts and drown everything else. For me I think of lines from the bible (Psalm 23:4) to do this. It boosts my confidence while I close my eyes and it also removes the fear in me. This has worked for me for 8 years now. Coming from somebody who, like you, does not want this gift I hope this will also work for you.
Tonith (1136 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
Sounds like you are very sensitive. That must be so hard to deal with. I know stress can do terrible things to the psyche which in turn can deplete the body. I don't know if it has anything to do with some draining enity because I have no experience with that personally. I know fear is paralyzing. I just don't know if it's your fear doing the manifesting or some actual entity.
DeviousAngel (11 stories) (1910 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
I have experienced something similar to this as well. I get that oppressive "watched" feeling so bad that I start having panic attacks and completely wigging out. Reshielding myself usually helps a lot, and enjoying some relaxing "me"-time, like taking a long bath or doing something that requries me to focus for a long while. I think Hoochler has some good advice there about healing your aura. Please, just do your best to try not to be afraid of spirits.:) If you show fear, they will prey on it and grow. Also know that cats not only sense, but protect. They are wonderful animals to have around.

Blessings,
DA
Hoochler (1 stories) (263 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
Surya,

It sounds to me like the single biggest manifestation of problems you are experiencing is terror. It does not sound like this entity is actually doing anything to you except making your terrified (which obviously leads to other problems, like lack of sleep). It sounds as if the root problem here is a spirit that is making you terrified.

You mentioned in a previous post that you have a hole in your aura. How do you know that? If you do have a hole in your aura, that all by itself could be why this thing is after you, you are an easy mark without your aura to protect you.

You have a crystal wand? You do know that certain minerals, crystalline minerals in particular, can attract spirits, right? How many other crystals or minerals do you have in close proximity to you? You might want to try to get rid of them (at least start with gathering up all the minerals and crystals you may have and store them at someone else's house for a few weeks).

What are you doing to restore your aura? If you are a yoga instructor, you must already know how to balance the energy across your chakras. Do you feel there is a hole in your aura in a certain place on your body (like the ozone hole over the Antarctic) or does it feel like a general hole that is indistinct or may move around (like rays of sunlight occasionally peeking through a passing cloud)?

You can try a modified version of the aura hardening technique listed in my profile that I stumbled across when my energy levels were low once. Do everything the same, but instead of making the protective force field protect your entire body, only have it form around that which makes you, you (i.e. Your higher self's soul). When I did this by accident once, I immediately saw an infinitely small shape in the middle of my brain that was shaped like a valence electron pattern around an atom. It was shaped like a 2 cones, each joined at their wide base to opposite sides of a doughnut with the same width as the cone's bases. Then it was like some of the air was pumped out of the cones to make them concave. It looked like a pretty Christmas ornament. Although I still could not see my soul itself, I could see this protective field I had erected around it that seemed to fit it like a glove. Make the field turn silver (like a mirror or like the liquid metal mercury) once you finish forming the field to help it reflect things. You can also give it spikes if you want to. Don't try to imagine the strange shape I described as you form the modified shield, just concentrate on forming the shield around your soul and let it take whatever shape it wants. If you do it right, a shape should become plainly visible to you in your mind's eye.

This shield will last for days or possibly even weeks, not hours. Be careful to form it that it only keeps out BAD thoughtforms, not good ones. This technique could allow you to completely wall yourself off emotionally from everyone, friends, family as well as enemies if you make the field undiscerning. I had to go back and modify the shield I made a few days after I first made it and tell it to allow all thoughtforms and energy that were sent to me with love to pass through as if the shield were not there. Things were fine after that.

This modified technique has the same effect for me to protect against thoughtforms that the full body method does (but is MUCH easier to set up), which it sounds like what you need the most right now. Once the entity can no longer send terror thoughtforms to you, you can work to heal your aura.

Hope this helps.

Hoochler
Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
KimSouthO
Thank you for reading my story. I pray every night more so recently. These happenings, the entities are so different from what I have been experiancing so naturally I am unprepared for the attacks. I sense what I am going to go though but like before where I could lie down and say go away leave me alone, is clearly not working now or my protection is slowly being stripped away. Please excuse any typos I am having trouble typing tonight.
Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
Inca is a boy, sorry when we got the kitty we thought it was a girl then realised she is actually a he, so it is bit difficult trying to call her a he but I am trying.
I thought it was my mind palying tricks but I have reuled that one out. I am in process of submitting another story which makes me 100% sure it is not my mind playing tricks on me. Thank you for reading my story.
KimSouthO (27 stories) (1960 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
If this experience was coming from anyone else, I might say that your mind was playing tricks on you. Given your history, I would say that you are far to in tune to what is happening ALL around you and within you that you did see and did hear things this day. You stated the whole day you knew things were not quite right. Your psyche was preparing for the unfotunaterly sleepless night you had.

Please say some prayers and blessings for your home (and for Inca).

God Bless!
ghostseer (41 stories) (408 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
Wow!, Powerful reminders that the human mind will fight the elements of the physical world. Sounds like you were being attacked and drained by a hidden force. It sucks when that happens. I've been there...Blessings, Ghostseer
hauntedbytheliving (2 stories) (11 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-11-20)
I have gotten myself so worked up before thinking I have heard or seen something that I haven't but my mind has been on overdrive and I have turned it into something that it wasnt. Maybe your mind was just really awake yet you were fighting to get to sleep.
Is Inca a boy or girl Cat?
You refer to it as both in your passage at different points.

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