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Encounter With A Friend?

 

I'm just seeking comments / discussion about an experience that I had. I've never talked about it before, but I have become curious about what happened and would be interested in other people's thoughts.

When I was 18, one year out of high school, one of my friends who was in the same grade as me committed suicide. I felt like I had not done my best to stop the situation, as I knew he was depressed and having suicidal thoughts. We were quite close, but I had become uneasy around him after high school.

Anyway, I was quite badly affected by his death, feeling somewhat responsible. I thought about him every day for a long time after. On the one-year anniversary of his death, I lit a candle in my room, for remembrance. I broke down in tears, apologizing to him continually for not being a good friend, and asked for a sign that he understood my side of things, and perhaps forgive me. I focused on the lighter I had used to light the candle, continually asking for a sign. After about a minute or so, the lighter moved about an inch across my desk. I was scared but somewhat at ease. I said out loud that I'd never ask him for a sign again, partly because I was so scared of what had happened.

Since then I've never seen any more signs and only 'talk to him' out loud on occasion.

Just wondering what everyone thinks of what happened. Is it possible that someone who had just gone a year before this could show a sign like this? I'm not sure.

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Comments about this paranormal experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, fernando, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

fernando (1 stories) (1 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-02)
Thanks everyone for your replies. It's really nice to get your support.
I'm not usually one to believe in supernatural things, but I felt very connected with him at that point in time. So I think it was real.
Thanks again.
koalagirl (3 stories) (111 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-02)
so sorry about your loss, its not your fault and I am sure your friend does not blame you, maybe he was just letting you by moving the lighter I hope as time goes by thing will feel better and I am sure they will 😊
DannyBruise (9 stories) (125 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-01)
Wow Fernando, that's a hard one to deal with no matter whether it was ghostly or not. I've heard about people that felt so guilty about no caring about their parents or someone close, that they can't let go.
I hope you find peace and closure.
zzsgranny (18 stories) (3312 posts) mod
 
8 years ago (2010-03-01)
I agree with Cosmo and Devious... I think he was showing you a sign that he didn't blame you... And you shouldn't blame yourself!...I don't think any one who is serious about taking their own life can be detered, unless you're in the same room with them... My oldest son's best friend was murdered a few years ago, and he felt really bad because his friend wanted to go to the movies, and my son never got back to him whether he would go or not... He was killed that night, walking by himself... I know it's not the same, but the guilt he felt is similar to yours... Just remember, it's hard to ask others for forgiveness, but it's even harder to forgive yourself... I hope you have! ❤
cosmogal926 (9 stories) (1223 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-01)
I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine losing a close friend like that. It is normal for you to feel like you could have done more to help him, but it really is the decision of that person. I absolutely think it is possible for someone who has passed to give you a sign such as moving a lighter. I'm sure your friend felt your pain and was trying to show you that he is ok and doesn't blame you for anything. 😊
DeviousAngel (11 stories) (1910 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-01)
I think it's very possible that your friend gave you the sign he was asking for. Although there were the warning signs you mentioned before he committed suicide, there are times that no even intervention like that will stop someone from taking their own life. You can't hold yourself responsible for someone else's actions because when it comes down to it, it was his choice. Still, I'm sorry that it happened and that you had to deal with that loss.

I think he wanted you to know that he didn't blame you or hold you responsible either.

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