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Murdered Friend Is Still About

 

I find it strange that I'm sharing a story that is so personal to me, but I would just like to get some understanding from it. I come from Manhattan, and I'm still currently living here.

It starts from 2002 when my father (brought up in the Bronx, but moved to upper east side) decided to give back to his community, since it has he says "made him who he is". He set up a graffiti club as I should put it, where kids in rougher neighbourhoods could come and get off the streets, and express their emotions through their art. It was successful, some trouble here and there but went great. I decided to go, and I befriended some people who If it wasn't for the club, I would never have thought they'd be friends. Cut the long story short, I really got on with Jay (Jay, not his real name but for privacy sake) with whom I could have so many laughs with. Tragically in early 2003 he was shot down in Harlem (where he came from). It was a tragic blow to the club and me personally. It affected me more then I could ever explain, it hurts and still does now just to think about him.

I visited the spot a few weeks later. I bent down and cried with my head in my hands, as I did I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I heard a laugh then a mumble I Will never make out, but it sounded something like "don't cry about me". I thought it was a respectful person, yet seconds later when I stood and turned nobody was there. I wasn't frightened; I just assumed it was someone who walked off fast. Driving back home still crying, I stopped at a light; I wiped my eyes and looked out the driver's window at some girls playing double Dutch. On the steps of the building beside them, I could have sworn I saw Jay; I was so convinced that I shouted his name. The kids were bewildered at who I was shouting at. And the man I saw didn't even look towards me, his eyes just stayed fixated somewhere over the top of the car. I drove off fast, sure that I was going crazy.

It wasn't until the club stopped in 2005, that strange things happened again. As I prepared food in the kitchen, my music player blasted a Tupac song, I think is called "Hold your head". It was from an album called "The Don Killuminati: The 7 Day Theory", which Jay persuaded me to buy, but I'd never listened to it since the day I'd brought it. This overwhelming feeling of happiness came over me, even though I knew I should be scared as for how a CD had got out of my bedroom closet into the stereo in my living room and then played by itself. I walked into the living room smiling and slightly laughing, and then I heard a laugh, very loud coming from by the hallway. I then became scared, even though I was so familiar with that laugh. I just stood there burst into tears, feeling that gutted feeling I felt those years ago. That night, as I got into my bed, my bedroom door opened, thinking it was my cat I got up and closed it. Now this is the part that I find so unbelievable and disturbing to think about. Half way down the hallway a figure stood, just dark with no features. It stood directly in front of a picture Jay and another kid had created. For about a minute I stood there bewildered, too scared to move staring at the figure that barely moved. Then, I just slammed my door, ran to my bed like a child. Since then I've never seen anything like that, but sometimes I don't feel alone in my home, and channels on TV have the tendency to switch to certain music channels.

I've never told anybody except my best friend and my father. On here I'm hoping people are more open minded and help me understand what happened. Even though I never believed in the paranormal, I really do think Jay is around me at times, which makes me feel happy to know. It really does scare me the idea of a ghost, but if it is Jay I know he's only there to joke around and just see if I'm okay. But I can't help thinking that people become ghosts on earth because they are stopped from going into the afterlife, because they have unfinished business?

Thank you for allowing me to tell this story, which has been bothering me for so long.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, siennateal, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

LindaD (1 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-26)
Sienna,
I am not sure what exactly keeps "spirits" here. I do agree with some of the others' comments that "Jay" seems to be comforting. Be careful though. It may not be "Jay".

Why do spirits make themselves known to us? I believe that for some reason, he can "see" you in some form or feel your presence. Imagine yourself "crossed-over". You're in a giant area of blackness. Then, you see/feel someone. You try to speak to them, but they don't hear you or acknowledge you. After awhile, you would probably get frustrated and do more brazen things to attempt some attention. Perhaps this is why now, he makes more contact. Don't get too attached to this spirit, just understand that if it is "Jay", he is just trying to be acknowledged by you, at least. 😉

I don't see a problem trying a recorder, except don't get attached to the spirit. There is an outside chance that it could be something malevolent using your emotions.

'Hope it helps.
Linda
roseblack (1 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-26)
Siennateal- I just have to say that you need to be careful when you get a recorder. I have heard stories that when people get a recorder and try to communicate with ghost they tend to invite more dangerous entities instead. So I say proceed carefully when you try to communicate with Jay. But I agree I think he is more just making sure you are ok and always happy. Thank you for sharing.
EmeraldAngel (4 stories) (319 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-16)
OMG I'm gone for a week or so and look at all the stories holy crap!
siennateal (1 stories) (3 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-16)
Pendragon - Currently I don't have a tape recorder, but I'm going to get one. I thought about it, and I guess I shouldnt be scared, as I know if its *Jay he doesn't want to scare me purposely. And don't feel silly for telling me to do it by myself, you wasn't to know that I may be scared. You've been really helpful thankyou:)

BrandonCr - I'm glad to know I may have give you some hope, and I myself hope that someday someone watches your back

Sienna
Pendragon (6 stories) (296 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-16)
Siennateal - Like I said earlier - just get a tape recorder, and ask Jay to tell you why he is still around. Generally you'd get answers this way, and you do not need to say anything further to him. Perhaps contact a Paranormal investigation team, and get them to do it for you, if you are truly scared. The vast majority of paranormal investigative teams do not charge for their services. Seeing as you live in New York, I would contact TAPS - the investigative team featured on the "Ghost Hunters" Shows. They do not charge for their investigations, and are considered one of the best teams availible.

I'm so sorry that I did not suggest an investigative team to you sooner. It is understandable that you would be scared/nervous. I feel so silly for telling you to do it yourself.

Please feel free to email me if you have any questions, or need advice - my email is on my profile page.

Penny ❤
BrandonCR (5 stories) (64 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-15)
That story truely touched me. To me this says that you and Jay had such a bond that even after Jay's death he is still around to watch your back. You are truely Blessed my friend, and I envy you in a way. Thank you for giving me a little extra hope.
Preeti (100 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-15)
I think you should say your friend to go as he is left behind because of your love, he must go and have a new born. It can be very dangerous my friend just say your friend lovingly " Jay I want you to go in heaven and reborn" please go and have a good life my friend I love you" with a smile on your face... But decision is on you...
May god bless you
❤ 😊
badtay16 (18 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-14)
I think hes there just to check up on you and to see how your doing

Taylor 😊
siennateal (1 stories) (3 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-14)
Thankyou everyone, a lot of what you are saying makes sense!

I'v been thinking a lot about why he'd stick around me, and I'v come up with my own explanations. Since I knew he had problems in his life, I always told him I'd stick around and always help him out, I feel as though hes doing the same for me now.

It may sound stupid, but I'm afraid to speak outloud to him. But I think I'm going to get the courage to do it, and see what happens.

Biblefreeme - your theory sounds quite right. I don't think he would of wanted the club to have shut down, so I think this may have upset him

A few strange things have been happening again lately, I'm hoping to post them.

Sienna
snowhite (203 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
It is a wonderful story. I can feel how you feel. In a way, you're happy to know J is still there, in another way that you are scared since he is a ghost. If I were you, I would tell him how much I miss him and let him know he has to move on. He needs to see the light, that is where he should go now. Encourage him to pass over and tell him he will always be loved.
biblefreeme (2 stories) (137 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
MCP thanks I'm glad someone got what I was saying you have it all worked out in your head its getting it down right that can make you look a right numpty lol 😆
MyChaoticPeace (1 stories) (108 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
BibleFreeMe-

That makes sense. Perhaps because it was such a sudden departure maybe he's a little confused?
biblefreeme (2 stories) (137 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
i think that what you saw when you first heard about his death was a clasic crisis aparition when the recently deceised show up to let you know all is well. But I can't help wondering if he may have spent a lot of time at the club and after it closed he sudenly for the first time felt wrong and lost and gravitated more toward you out of panic looking for comfort and familiarity it can take along time to get used to being a spirit he may need a lot of love and patience to help move on remember hes just as afraid as you and he may go a little to far some times until hes used to being a ghost.
MyChaoticPeace (1 stories) (108 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Siennateal -

This is a beautifully sad story. It's tragic what happened to him. I wish there was something that I could say that would help with that pain but really time is the only cure.

Sometimes it's unfinished business but sometimes its that there is a person they worry for. Sometimes they stay behind for someone. I agree with some of the other posts. Remember him cherish him, let him know that, then let him go. Tell him there's a beaituful place where people that love him are waiting for him.

Good hearts go to Good places.
Surya (39 stories) (867 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
A beautiful story. I would agree with cosmogal926 on this one. It is hard letting those you love the most go. Light that candle. Tell "Jay" how much he meant to you and that you will always cherish the times you shared. Let him go it is hard but you have to do it. Once you have let him move on to the light you will find that the pain you have of losing a friend so dear will not hurt anymore. But remember he will always be with you. An angel by your side.

Surya
cosmogal926 (9 stories) (1223 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Hello siennateal, I'm happy to see another New Yorker here at YGS 😁 I just want to say how sorry I am for the loss of your friend. It's hard enough to lose a loved one from old age, or illness but when something so tragic as this happens it's very hard to accept. I think your friend is sticking around you because he knows you are in deep mourning for him. He probably wants to tell you he's ok and wants to make sure you are too before he moves on. You can try lighting a candle and saying a prayer for your friend asking that he finds his way into the light where he can rest in peace. I hope peace comes to both you and your friend. Thank you for sharing your story. Take care 😊 ❤
BellaPhantom12199 (1 stories) (13 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
i understand what has happened its happened to me before with my grandma and my friend sees her two dead grandpas in her dreams even though she never met them! 😕
Pendragon (6 stories) (296 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Ohai fellow partier! I was wondering when you'd show up. Thank you for making me not sound completely crazy. Having others agree with my crazy theories makes me think I'm not quite as... Strange...

Though I know I'm very out there. C'mon, I semi-worship the Greek Gods. I'm odd. Don't hide it from me. 😉

Siennateal - Let us know what happens after you try talking to Jay. I would love to be updated. If you don't feel comfortable posting it, feel free to email what happens to me - my email is public in my profile. I would love to assist further, if you notice anything else about Jay's ghost. I have a question - Have the visits from Jay been pretty well the same since 2005? I forgot to ask earlier.

Penny ❤
Dan_Paranormal (1 stories) (74 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
I'm sorry to hear about you losing your friend Siennateal. Thank you for a sharing your experiences and your story.

I agree with the idea of his shadow being him but with not enough energy to manifest fully. It's also possible that some of the energy you had put out earlier in the day helped him achieve being able to show you himself in the form of a shadow.

I personally believe that this is your friend very much so trying to tell you not to worry and trying to comfort you in saying I'm still here don't worry I haven't been removed from your life completely, though I'm not here in physical form I am still with you in spirit. I think he personally picked you to stay with maybe because of how you felt but possibly through the connection that you two had.

The fact he chose that CD to play shows a lot of personal things between you two and really could be a way of him showing you that it is him.

I also think that Penny has a very good point with the idea of passing on.

I hope some of this helped, just my ideas on your story. Thanks for sharing it.
Pendragon (6 stories) (296 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Certainly! I love the idea of loved ones coming back. It makes sense that they would want to make sure that we are okay, and this case with Jay seems to be just that. He doesn't seem evil in the slightest - more like he wants to remind you that he is still around.

You have the right idea; if you feel him near by, just tell him something to the effect of, "Jay, I know you're still here because you care, and I appreciate that. However, I think it woudl be better for you to move on, to the afterlife, to your final rest. You will feel better, and I will be happy knowing that you can rest easy. You know I will not forget about you." Perhaps, next time you are out shopping, stop and get a bracelet or pendant that reminds you of him, as a physical reminder of him, and let him know that you will be doing this. One of the things my mom used to have was a crystal rainbow catcher to remind her of my grandma. I got a tattoo in tribute to her. I'm sure it would make him happy for you to do something along those lines.

Like I said - it is certainly a possibility that he passed on, then came back. It's happened in many cases that I've read.

And of course I'll tel you;

Spirits come in varying strengths, just like people. Spirits will draw energy from whatever they can - a TV, a radio, light, heat, ect - to be able to maifest and show themselves. Like it takes a greater deal of muscle to lift 100lbs than it does 50lbs, it takes more energy for a spirit to manifest into a full apparition than it does a shadow. A shadow is a basic form, and very fluid. It is easy to change and maintain, and black is a shade. Basic science tells us that the shade, black, attracts all heat and energy and light; it's easier to get warm when you're wearing black clothes, rather than white ones, because black absorbs all light, and white does not.

It would take an entity less energy to appear as black, than it would for them to appear as white - white implies that they have enough energy to show themselves at will. Black indicates that they need more energy. Think of a battery - a full battery will help things run better and faster. A near empty batter tends to make the electronic flicker and wane, and means that your electronic is not getting enough energy.

Hope this explains it a bit better.

Penny ❤
siennateal (1 stories) (3 posts)
 
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Thankyou Penny for that information, it was very helpful:)

When you say that I should tell him to move on, how do I do this? Do I speak outloud if I feel as though he may be in the room?
The idea that he may have come back as a guardian is really touching, and it would make sense as he was a very protective and kind guy in real life.

Also would you mind telling me what the energy thing is about, I really don't know much about the paranormal and these things are all new to me.

Thanks once again:)

Sienna
Pendragon (6 stories) (296 posts)
+2
7 years ago (2010-08-13)
Siennateal - I think there are two possibilities here:

1) Jay needs to be told that he needs to move on, and that you'll be okay. He needs to know this. He knows that you were affected the worst by his passing, and wants to make sure you're living as well as you can. You need to tell him, kindly but firmly, that if he wants you to feel better, HE needs to pass on and rest, and that you'll miss him, but you know he'll be happier on the other side.

2) He's already been to the light, and come back, and could be some kind of guardian. In my world, shadow people manifestations are just spirits who do not have the strength, nor the energy, to manifest themselves into an aparition. A shadow is the easiest form for them to create, as it absorbs the energy around it, allowing them to maintain the form. The fact that he maintained a human shape is amazing - it would require lots of concentration on his spirits part. It would have taken a lot of his energy.

You could try doing some EVP sessions with him, and ask him questions, or even just turn on a recorder, announce that it's on, and leave it at that, and go out, or go to bed. You'd be surprised at what you hear. 😉

Penny ❤

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