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Was it a Dream?


I'm not really sure if this is classed as a ghost encounter, I'm not sure what it is. So I'll let you decide! My Dad died suddenly just before Christmas last year (2006). He suffered a massive brain hemorrhage whilst at home last year, and was found by my Mum a couple of hours later. He was only 52 and in good health, so as you can imagine it was a massive shock to me and my family. He was a big guy, I thought he was invincible. He was my hero. We were all filled with the same regret of not being able to say goodbye. Such a sudden death brings a lot of feelings along with grief, and I felt totally at a loss. I wrote him a letter, which was placed in his coffin, as I couldn't think of any other way to say my goodbyes.

About 2 weeks after he died I had the most vivid, emotional dream I think I've ever had. I dreamt that I was in my car, in the driving seat, and suddenly my Dad appeared in the passenger seat. I remember feeling totally shocked, because in my dream I was totally aware of the fact that he was dead and therefore shouldn't be sat in my car! There were 2 or 3 people also sat in the backseat, although I can't remember who they were or what they looked liked. I asked my Dad what he was doing here and who were the people in the backseat? He said that he'd come to visit me and the people were here with him as he wasn't allowed to visit on his own yet.

I was so happy to see him, I immediately told him that we had to go and find my Mum and brother who were at a local supermarket as they had to see him. He told me he couldn't because he had to go. I began to cry and was begging him to stay. I leaned over and hugged him, still crying uncontrollably, and he then said "don't worry, it's safe and warm where I am" and then "it's fluffy!" I was still holding him when he kind of just faded away, along with the people in the back. I was left on my own in the car, crying, when I suddenly woke up.

I laid there and was so stricken with grief that I continued crying almost uncontrollably for quite a while. It felt like I had my Dad back and then lost him all over again. I was very upset from this dream for about a week as I couldn't shake the feeling that it was actually him, and he had come to visit me.

I'm fully aware that due to my state of mind and the fact I hadn't said goodbye, my mind could have created this dream, as it was what I was longing for most. I would have given anything to get my Dad back, and I know that dreams often just convey what is going on in the depths of your mind. But what surprised me was the realness of the dream, and the fact that I could physically feel the emotions I did in my dream, grief, shock etc.

But I also think that it's possible that it was a visit. Dreams can take you anywhere you want to go, and surely if it was just a dream, why wasn't he alive and well? I really don't know what to think of if. I've asked a couple of friends who are mediums and they said it's very possible that it was actually him. I've also been told that the people with him are guides and they supervise new spirits on visits.

I'm not religious at all, so his description of being "safe and warm" doesn't signal to me that he's in heaven, maybe he is, I can't comment on whether heaven is real because I've never been! My Mum, brother and sister all had dreams that he visited them too, and a few other strange coincidences also happened shortly after.

So what do you guys think? Was it him? Or just a dream, my mind letting me see him because that's what I wanted most in the world? I think it's also worth noting that shortly after my Grandad died a few years ago, my Mum had a very similar dream (he was her dad). And she also said that he was with some people she had never met. Maybe my brain just replicated that dream, a way of helping my state of mind?

I'm a true believer in ghosts and all things paranormal, but I'm also a very level headed, rational person. I have crazy dreams all the time, so I'm fully aware that it could be JUST A DREAM! I'm interested to know if anyone has had a similar experience, especially concerning the 'guides' that appear to accompany the person.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, lian01, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

gbeach (3 stories) (9 posts)
15 years ago (2007-08-06)
Hey Lian!
I sooo understand what you're talking about. I lost my mom when I was fourteen and when she appears in my dreams I can't see her face, just her frosted blonde hair. She talks to me in much of the same manner. Safe, secure and I smell her perfume. My hubby was married once before and swears his grandad came to him (in the car )and told him to leave his abusive relationship before he ended up like he had been, broken and love starved. And this came from a man who swears he's a non believer! I wish you love and peace. Sorry for your loss but know that a higher realm exists.
lauren beach
lian01 (3 stories) (65 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-30)
Thank you all for your lovely comments. It's good to know that other people have experienced the same thing, and it even if it was just dream, I still take a lot of comfort from it.
Lexiluca, thanks for the book suggestion, I shall look it up on amazon.
And thank you Helen for your comments too.
You guys have helped a lot šŸ˜
Helena (1 stories) (10 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-27)

I wrote a post a few minutes ago and realized I wanted to add something else: After a few of these vivid dream encounters spanning several years, my grandmother told me during one of the meetings that she would not be able to meet with me any more in the same way. I didn't understand exactly what she meant at the time, but since then, she has not appeared to me in that very physical way. Rather, her presence has been more subtle, and with more time between visits. I think this speaks to the question you had about your dad being accompanied by guides. While I didn't experience that directly with my grandmother, I sense an evolution and expansion our loved ones go through as they carry on in this other dimension. Perhaps they make visits early on with guides, then by themselves, and then perhaps their ability or availability to visit changes... I don't know. Just some ideas to considerā€¦Be well.
Helena (1 stories) (10 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-27)
Hello Lian,

Thank you for sharing this experience, which I believe was very "real..." When I was a child, my grandmother told me that she would visit me (ie, "check in" on me) after she died. That frightened me a little at the time. However, whenever there is something very emotional going on in my life, she makes her presence known in a way that is not scary at all.

For instance, after moving into a new home a few years ago (always a hectic time), I laid down on the bed to rest. I woke up some time later to the sensation of my grandmother sitting on the edge of the bed, stroking my hair and communicating her happiness that I had found a new home.

I have also had incredibly unusual "dreams" about her--for instance, in one dream, I saw her sitting in a crowded cafe. I walked over and sat down at her table, and she told me something of great importance. The textures and sounds and subtleties of these dreams are not ordinary--they are genuine encounters, like the one you had with your dad in the car.

I know it was a difficult and emotional encounter for you-- but I believe your dad visited you out of love and concern, and in response to the letter you wrote him. I hope that you can meet with him again in ways that are very peaceful and healing for you. Take care.
Lexiluca (8 stories) (78 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-27)
I think it was him. :) Totally. My mother still visits me in my dreams when something extremely stressful is going on in my life, and they're incredibly lucid. They start out the exact same way, she gives me a verbal arse kicking, and we enjoy the time we spend together there - it's brief, very brief, but she says what she wants to say and I always wake up with a little more strength to take on the world. They're rare, but when I'm feeling at my worst, she stops by and tells me to knock it off. I am not religious either, and I have a hard time (and have never asked) if she is in heaven. But I do know that she is comfortable wherever she is.

I have an idea for you if you haven't read this book already. Read "the Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold. This book helped me tremendously with coping with my mothers death, as it is directly about death - it's a completely different story, but the idea of how this young girl is watching her family over a certain amount of years - until she is comfortable and ready to let go. If there are things still occurring, your father (I believe) is still keeping an eye out for you all, as he is not completely comfortable with leaving his family entirely yet. And once he does, his essance will still always be waiting on the other side.
lian01 (3 stories) (65 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-27)
Shane- I'm really interested in what you said about our mental defences being lowered when we sleep, allowing the other side to communicate with us. I thought the exact same thing when discussing this dream with a friend. I put forward the idea that when we sleep, we have no way of allowing our mind or energy to block such things, and maybe dreams were the easist way for spirits to contact us, without any kind of resistance from the person being visited.
Maybe I wasn't so wrong!
*feeling a little smug*
Bellissima (12 stories) (792 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-27)
Hi Lian! I'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad and the sudden shock it must have been. I believe what happened was more than a dream. I have experienced the very same thing. To me the point you made about the state of your Dad and that he didn't seem alive and well makes me certain it wasn't just a regular dream. In the dream I had, the person was as he'd been in his coffin, not a particularly pretty sight, and we had an actual conversation. There were no guides with us during our conversation though.
I tried to comment on your 'Hovering Vacuum Cleaner' but the site wouldn't let me, it said something like not to use the same symbols frequently, whatever that means. I just wanted to say that it was a great and well written story. You should hang out with Max more often and maybe you could see some of these things first hand!
Shane (13 stories) (1258 posts)
15 years ago (2007-07-26)
Hello Lian,

First, let me say thank you for sharing that heart felt story with us. I am in total agreement with Martin, which should surprise no one, he may not be a ghost hunter but he is one intelligent dude. When we are a sleep our mental defenses are lowered which allows those on the other side especially those who have just crossed to communicate with us. You are going to get some of the people here trying to convience you it was just a lucid dream, well they didn't experience it, you did, so only you know what really happened. Deep down you know it was your father coming back to say his good byes to you and your family and in the end that is all that matters.

Peace, Love, and Luck be with you always.
Martin (602 posts) mod
15 years ago (2007-07-26)
Hi lian01, I think that dreams that have a different quality to them, those that are vivid and feel real and leave you with a strong emotional impact even as you wake up are more likely to be real psychic experiences (or as others would say, real astral projections), so, I for one, believe you. Dreams being dreams, though, I wouldn't obsess over details, because we all know there's a lot of surreal noises to our dreams, but the fundamental message is probably a translation of something that really happened.

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