Before I start whatever I am saying may seem quite "dreamy" or whatever you do please don't name it as one of my fake teen "fantasies". I will be obliged if you agree to that!
It started from the day of my fourteenth birthday, I guess? Okay... So yeah, and as every little young teenager I was VERY excited as I overheard my parents the other day, (something like 4 days before the due date of me being 14) that they were going to plan a surprise birthday party for me! I was very thrilled to hear my parents talk about it!
On my fourteenth birthday. Everything seemed happy until my parents decided they go out the next morning. I was kind of excited thinking that I will have the house all to myself. So, the whole day passed peacefully and it was awesome... And boring!
Awesome - I started reading stories of "incubus" and "succubus" demons. And as I was of a tender age, the word - ehem - "Sex" attracted me. Okay stop giggling please!
Actually, to be honest, I began reading about them for a while! At first I was kind of pleased thinking "How can a dead ghost be attracted sexually to a human?" Well, I meant is that, maybe a human female or male might be that beautiful to attract a lusty-eyed demon? Wow that was interesting!
So, I kept on different stories especially ranging from sexual fantasies to avenging circumstances. Then I got scared and I stopped reading about them.
Things were normal for a few months until my parents went to Dhaka for some professional problems. I had to stay home all alone - along with my cousin - but she is always busy with her boyfriend and that pisses me all the time. I had a bad breakup who cheated on me and so I stopped believing in love.
One night, I was reading the oh-so-famous Twilight novel all alone in my room while my cousin went out on the other corner of the house. As I began reading I felt as if someone had spoken my name out.
Specifically, you could call it "barely audible" and so I shrugged it off and continued reading the fantasy novel.
THEN... It caught me off-guard!
I felt a trail of slender fingers across my spinal cord and back. It made me shiver involuntarily.
I was so scared.
Again, I thought that maybe I was dreaming but no it continued the whispering of my name and the touches... It is scaring the hell out me!
So I practically ran out of my "ghostly" room like an insane lunatic. My cousin was still enjoying her quickie on the phone as it seemed. She almost fell on her bed when she saw me panting like a dog. Then it hit me... If I tell her then she would call me a psycho who needs help and I seriously didn't want to take an appointment from the psychiatrist!
So when she asked me what happened I simply replied I saw a big cockroach.
I know it seems weird I was so scared that I had to sleep with my cousin. It was normal for a few days... At least for a year and I was very happy thinking that it was over.
But it was not...
Few months ago, now that I am fifteen, I began reading fantasy novels online. They were pretty much amazing but that only led to sex, violence, etc.
I hated it so much! So I stopped searching and went to sleep in my room. It was 1.30 am after midnight and I was kind of scared thinking I should have slept earlier.
As soon as I laid comfortably on my bed all of a sudden I felt a sudden pressure on my chest.
I couldn't breath at all. It was like someone was actually sitting on me. I tried to move but my hands and arms were aching and I felt paralyzed. I began chanting one of my Surahs and then I felt the pressure waver off my chest.
I felt relief wash over me. But still it didn't stop. A huge gush of warm air surrounded my arms and ankles as if someone is grabbing or standing near me... I just can't differentiate the feeling.
But all I know is that it wasn't good. I prayed to God and then closed my eyes until I drifted off to sleep.
In my sleep I saw a faceless person, all I know is that he was very handsome - but somehow I don't remember his face - standing before me naked. He stood with some sort of heavy smile planted on his face.
In my dream I "saw" myself acting nicely towards him as if I know him. He began sauntering towards me with his grin afresh he continued to walk to me until he stood so close that our noses were touching.
He grabbed my face and kissed me, I mean KISSED? Excuse me? Some weird handsome pervert kissed in my own dream? I on the other hand saw my "dream-self" accepting his sexual advances. He began opening my clothes and that made me mad. But I just stood there watching myself as if he was trying to show me something.
The mysterious guy slowly undressed me until - ehem again - he began... Please no more details as you must know what he must have been doing. But he couldn't proceed anymore as I saw my mother out of nowhere appear and shooed him away.
Inwardly, I was thankful to my mother for actually saving me from watching myself have sex with a faceless ghost.
The evidence that proved that it was the same person who spoke my name because it the voices were similar!
This is freaking me out. In the morning I woke up panting and to my utter horror, I felt wet between my thighs. It was super disgusting and horribly annoying.
After that I NEVER sleep alone. I feel as if someone is always beside me. Although the sexual encounters decreased - as it never happens when I with someone - the touches and the gush of hot air, pressure on my chest, etc, they seem the same!
Sometimes I even someone grabbing my hair, strangling my neck. Even someone even kissing me forcefully, so urgently that as if "it" would die if it didn't kiss me.
It is so weird! And I feel I am insane but really I am not. I wrote in need to decrease my burden as I can't tell anyone. So I was compelled to tell mine.
NOTE: He never came back to have sex with me in my dreams but yes he did try to kiss me many times.
I won't force you all to help me but as I am a devout Muslim although not completely religious I would really want this all to stop. It scares me and moreover I can't tell anyone afraid that they might think me mad!
Thank you for reading this.