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The Shadow Inside Of Me


This is only part of my story. The beginning actually. I will post the rest of it if you guys want to hear more. The haunting has started between 1998 and 2001 and has now catched up with me. Have a nice reading.

I had no clue it would come to this. I don't even know why I did it. I didn't do it just once. I did it many times. I shouldn't of done it. When will he take me away?

It all started when I was a young child, maybe four or five. It started in my sleep actually. I had this voice that talked to me when I was dreaming. This is not uncommon, but I had never heard this voice before. This voice was so deep, that the first time I heard it, even my young naive mind knew it was not human. It didn't trouble me at first. It was friendly, and talked to me gently and to be honest, that voice pretty much gained my confidence. Kind of like an imaginary dream friend. But in my head. After a few months, I started hearing it when I was awake. Even then it was being gentle and friendly, and I had no problems with it. Until the day my grandfather died a few years later. I was not really close to the guy, barely knew him. He was wheelchair bound and a crazed alcoholic, so my parents, who are pretty protective, didn't let him see me that much. The moment we pulled up in the driveway of the funeral home, I knew something was wrong. Those memories are so vivid in my mind. How could I forget? It started talking to me but not in the nice usual way. The voice was screaming random mean perverted things to me. Things kid's shouldn't hear. I told him to stop. My parents stared at me for a moment, and I realized I had just said that out loud. After telling my mom everything was fine, we got inside. We spent well over half an hour in the funeral home as my parents shared condolences with the rest of the family and friends. I was standing beside the corpse, and noticed a shining crucifix. Not being from a religious family and all, I didn't really cared about Jesus, but I thought it was pretty nice, so I walked up to it and touched it. The moment I touched it, everything went wrong. The voice in my head started yelling so loud, that I dropped on the ground hands over my ears, screaming. Everyone stopped what they were doing and just stared at me. Thinking about it now, I kind of feel embarrassed but what ever they probably forgot. My mom, tears in her eyes grabbed me by my shoulders and started shaking me telling me to stop. That's when it happened. I can remember it with so much detail every time I think about it It's like I had headphones on my head playing it back. The voice in my head screamed at me YOUR SOUL WILL BE MINE. And suddenly it stopped. My mom took me back home while my dad stayed at the funeral until the end.

This might seem incredible, but It's just the beginning. I was too scared to sleep for a few days after this, but eventually, I had no choice. Surprisingly, my sleep was not troubled by a screaming voice, and I was pretty damn happy about it. It had stopped. For a short time. A few days later, it talked to me. I was sure in my mind, that if it came back, it would be as violent as it was at the funeral, but to my surprise, it was apologetic. Apologies were offered, and me being a naive young boy, accepted them. To make up for it's misdeeds, the voice offered to take me flying, as it said. I was, like every boy pretty fond of flying, so I accepted. It took me, as some people call it, on a lucid dream, or on a out of body experience. If you are not familiar with this, it is as if your mind got out of your body and traveled anywhere it wanted. Some people don't believe in this, but I do. I remember it so clearly, as I rushed through the hot summer air flying above my neighborhood. I felt so free. Unfortunately, my trip quickly ended and I was pulled back into my body so fast, kind of like a slingshot. Once back inside my body, saw it. A large shadow, with no traits. If it had a face, I could not see it. It just stood there, possibly staring at me. I was terrified, I tried to run, but I could not move nor speak. I was so scared I puked. All over my bed sheets. When I looked up, the shadow was gone, and I started crying and yelling for my parents. They rushed in the room asking what was wrong. When I told them about the shadow, they said what every one would of said. "It was your imagination"or "It was probably a dream." No it was not. I remember seeing that shadow, and I was well awake.

For the next few years, it was thought I had OCD. Every time I went around a pole for example, I had to come around it on the other side. If I dribbled a ball once with one hand, I had to do it with the other. Those are just a few example, but the point is, I didn't have OCD. Every time I did something like this, the voice in my head told me to do it, or my soul would be his. This takes us to the beginning of this post. I agreed to those requests every time. It was challenging me and I agreed every time. The climax of those small events happened at my town's pool. My mom took me there because it was well above 100 degrees and we could not afford a pool or air conditioning. I was not a very good swimmer, but when I was fooling around with some kid's I knew over there, the voice talked. I know this whole voice thing sounds crazy, but it's true. He told me to go under water and swim from one end of the pool to the other. Wanting to keep my soul, I obliged. I swam as fast as I could even If I was pretty slow (Still am by the way). As I crossed the half mark of the pool, my lungs were burning so hard, I started to exhale. Even if no air was left in my lungs and I thought they were going to explode, I kept going, kept going until I inhaled. After this part, I don't recall the trip back home, since I was out cold. When I woke up, it was night time, and it was there. The shadow. This time, it was standing above me and I'm almost 100% sure it was staring at me. I started shivering with cold, I could move this time, but I was too shocked to do anything. I pissed my pants. I wanted to scream but I couldn't. I was shaking uncontrollably and I couldn't breathe. The voice then started laughing. Like if it was happy or something. It then said to me, "Your soul is mine" in a voice so calm it almost scared me more than the shadow. I closed my eyes to cry, and when I opened them again, it was gone.

After these incidents, the voice stopped, and the shadow was not bothering me any more. That last event probably happened when I was 10 or 11, but the reason why I wanted to share this, is because it has started again. The voice and the shadow. I woke up a few nights ago, and you know that feeling when you stare in the darkness of your room and you think you can make a shape out of a shadow and your not sure if it's something or just your imagination? When this happened to me last week, I saw the shadow. I was so terrified, I pissed in my bed. I am 20 years old and I'm not afraid to admit it. The voice also talked to me. It just said "It's almost time."

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, rippedvanilla, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

regi375 (1 stories) (10 posts)
10 years ago (2012-12-05)
Hey rippedvanilla,
Do this, go to tootle and search "micheal invocation." Do the Same with "white light shields" also wear a blessed cross. I have had a similair experience, and believe me, it backed off. What you are doing is protecting yourself from it. Do the white light shield and then the micheal invocation. Say the micheal invocation three times for effect also. After that then put on the cross. If it comes back, rinse and repeat. Please be careful too, if it gets ticked off get to s church. It cannot go onto hallowed ground. Tell the priest what's happening. The Christian religion has power over the demon.

Hope this helps. Keep me filled in.
milenko_necromancer (11 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-27)
Thank you, flyclarinet. I'm glad that I'm not the only one who feels that someone should have some experience in the occult/demonology or at least have some background knowledge of it before giving advice to those who have found themselves in a situation where something involving the occult has more of an interest in them than they have in it and are scared because of it. Now, I'm not saying this to make those who find this site and try to help others without the information/experience look bad (as I try to help out whenever possible), but it would be a good idea for everyone to look into the subject of the occult/ghosts/demons/etc. Before they post a comment hoping to be helpful. If for no other reason than to be certain that what you are saying would make sense and be helpful, rather than seem like it may be helpful but might not be.
The long and short of what I just said is that I'm glad that I'm not the only one who thinks it is a good idea to study up on the subject at hand prior to commenting in hopes of being helpful and then I explained why it is a god idea.

flyclarinet (1 stories) (36 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-26)
Sounds pretty scary. I'd just do my best to hide my fear, being as though it could be feeding off of it. Milenko, you are very knowledgeable about the paranormal and I like that.:) Wish more people were like you when it comes to stuff like this.
GreyFeather (44 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-24)
I guess I'll be Captain Obvious here and tell you to ask Jesus (the Son of God) to save you from that whatever it is. Whether real or imagined, "Jesus fix it!" is always my safetynet. Try Him, and see for yourself. When times are critical and there's no time to waste call on Jesus-call Him with haste! Demons will tremble; desease will expel; call on His Mighty Name and in safety you will dwell.
It's so obvious.
I felt like rhyming, don't mean to seem insincere.
rookdygin (24 stories) (4458 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-23)

With all due respect to yourself but There are some very 'normal' things that need to be considered. Please visit your doctor as many, many of the things you have described may have a 'natural' cause. Anything 'natural/normal' must be ruled out before the paranormal can be considered.

As far as what Milenko_Necromancer has stated concerning Shadow People... They have merely offered one theory among many.

Shadow People can be anything from a 'spirit' that has only enough energy to show itself as a shadow to a menacing presence that has chosen, as a scare tactic, to show itself as a shadow. They are not just "a demon of some sort" as Milenko has suggested.

Having said all of that its obvious something has you worried so I offer this, better safe than sorry. Please keep us updated.

Recipe for a Home Cleansing/Shielding... (allow for two or 3 days to complete)

Day one: Open all curtains window and doors with screens installed, let fresh air and sunshine into the home. Have all closets, cabinets and other 'dark spaces' open so that as much natural light as possible can enter those spaces. After 2-3 hours take a broom and 'sweep' out each room (this is symbolic and you do not have to really sweep) focus your thoughts on sweeping (pushing) out all negative energies / entities /thoughts. Close home up after completing each room of your home... Please do not forget your garage if you have one. (Optional) Light incense (sandalwood or Dragons-blood works well for me) and let aroma fill the home, and/or play a tape that contains your favorite Church/Positive, Upbeat (songs that give you good thoughts) songs before you begin sweeping.

Day two (or three): Once again open all curtains, windows and doors. Take a White candle (Optional) to the center most point of the home, sit on the floor and place candle in front of you. Light the candle (visualize a white ball of light) and then focus on the flame... Visualize the flame (white light) filled with positive thoughts, energy. (Say a prayer at this time if you so desire... Ask for cleansing positive energy to fill the candles flame/white light). Hold this 'image' in your mind and then visualize the flame (light) slowly expanding outward, visualize it filling the room your in, every corner and 'dark space'. Continue to visualize it's outer edges pushing away (burning away) any and all negative energies/entities out and away from each room in your home. Once you have visualized this flame (light) filling your entire home, picture it expanding to your property lines. Hold this image in your mind for a few moments then visualize 'anchoring' this flame (light) where you are sitting which is the center most point of your home. Once you have done this. Take a deep breath, relax a few moments and then blow out the candle. (If you didn't use a candle just let yourself relax a moment or two.) "

Now you can create a shield for yourself using the 'home shield' technique but instead of focusing on your home visualize the 'flame' simply surrounding you instead of your home... Best time to do this is after a nice shower using a rosemary scented soap (rosemary is good for purification and protection.)


Sceptic-Ari (2 stories) (611 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-23)
Dear rippedvanilla!

Your story seems very uncanny! Very similar to things I have read in fiction... Especially the ending 🤔

Are you trying to get us to trip? 😉

TheJokesonu (guest)
10 years ago (2012-11-23)
don't cry. Be strong. People have been through worse. Crying and worrying doesn change anything
milenko_necromancer (11 posts)
10 years ago (2012-11-22)
Thanks for posting this story, honored to be the first one to comment, and all that.
I am 14 years old. However, I have more knowledge and experience with the paranormal than most people twice my age, so please don't ignore or disregard my advice or comment. This said, I am willing to bet that the being you described (the shadow, the voice) is more than likely known as a "Shadow Person" or a demon of some sort. These beings have been known to stalk people, instilling fear into their victims. They often do things very similar to what you have experienced: talking to them when the victim is young and naive in a calm voice (so they don't alarm the child), then later becoming hostile and eventually can cause insanity and try to convince you to do something that would probably mean death (as your "shadow"/"voice" did. More so than usual because you touched the crucifix), then "disappearing" for a while. They actually don't leave, they just follow you without conveying any contact so that you think they aren't there anymore. Then, one day, they return to contacting you. Another characteristic of the shadow people is the black shadow (hence the name) and the ability to cause lucid dreaming. In most cases they simply stay until you fear them just as much or more than you did as a kid. This may happen many times until you die, be it from natural causes like old age or disease, or from the creature taking your soul (the very essence of your life). Let's hope for the old age or disease.

Sorry if this is a little unsettling, but the being saying "It's almost time" tells me that it either plans on taking your soul soon and therefore taking your life or it is foretelling that you will probably die soon. Then again, maybe not. Perhaps it has simply returned to instill the fear in you again.

Hope my information has helped,

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