I'm currently 24 years old but since I can remember I have always had bad luck and strange things happening to me. I would just like to say my mother told me she had to get a priest to bless her because of a incident with a Ouija board when she was younger. Maybe this thing she conjured has latched onto me somehow? I also just learnt she is seeing this same figure as me.
Anyways I'd like to start with my childhood. I was raised in a violent and abusive environment, which included a lot of trauma on my behalf. My father and best friend committed suicide when I was very young. I believe this thing disguised itself as my father once and showed itself to me also. I do believe these demons or whatever are attracted to broken people and the such... So I have read.
When I was around 12 or so I was very much into occult things and had a lot of the occult symbols all over my room and I practiced a few rituals stupidly enough. One night I was awoke by a dark shadow figure standing at the bottom of my bed and it was trying to pull away my blanket. I couldn't do anything about it, I felt completely powerless to it. This has been happening to me ever since. It has appeared as a couple and it has appeared just at my door reaching around from behind it opening it slowly. I also heard unexplainable scratching in my built in wardrobe. When I checked there was scratch marks all over the inside of the door, like claw marks or fingernails and they were deep.
Ever since that night I have struggled with addictions and a voice in my head that takes over sometimes urging me to do bad things. It has been really bad these past few weeks. I have become on and off depressed also.
This figure has never left. Every so often it will appear again over the years here and there but not until around this time last year. I had a bad breakup with my partner of 8 years, I got depressed again and got into the occult once more, I stupidly was present when someone summoned a demon and during this I was in an extremely bad place. Then all of sudden this same shadow I seen when I was younger would appear every single night.
I was sleeping on the sofa for a good month and it would appear over the top of me on the wall, it would appear on the walls opposite me, even when I got to lie down on the bed it would still be there standing over me. The feeling that someone was there was really immense I would stay up all night. The strange noises would come back and electrical appliances would turn off and on. They wouldn't even be plugged in, I couldn't explain it whatsoever.
Ever since this I've had lots of bad luck, ie I've lost nearly every job I've had due to circumstances I can't control leading to financial issues. I've been extremely depressed and even have had suicidal thoughts which have been very prominent this past while. I've lost loved ones, my addictions are really bad now. I have gotten injured lots and I have changed from a nice outgoing guy to a very quiet kind of loner type and I've become a very angry person inside. I've had bad thoughts about my sexuality also... And I know that I am straight because I am only attracted to females and always have been.
I've signed myself in for some counseling because whatever this thing it, it is winning and it's making my life unbearable. I do believe it has been with me on and off since I was a child. I just think it makes itself extremely known when I'm at my weakest moments.
I thought I would put this up and see what other people say and think. Thanks for reading I appreciate it.