How Do I Get My Normal Life Back?

This happened to me when I used to live in Varanasi. As I had mentioned in my previous posts I live with my husband and son. My husband is in a transferable job so every 2-5 years we shift to a new city. We came to Varanasi in 2017 and were living in a government allotted bungalow. Everything was fine with that house. I never felt anything scary even when I was alone in the house with my son for 2-3 days when my husband was out on a tour.

It all started in 2021. Some incidences occurred which I will discuss one by one. The post is going to be long so kindly be patient.

At the end of 2020, my MIL got brain stroke and half of her body was paralyzed for months before she succumbed in 2021 Feb after suffering a lot. In March, my son who was completely healthy otherwise, woke up from sleep and was sitting on bed in the morning when suddenly he fell on the mattress with facial paralysis kind of condition on one side of the face (resembling my MIL's condition but only the face). He had urinated on bed (he was 11 years old then and had never wet his bed after he was like 2 years old) and tears were rolling down his face. This condition lasted for maybe 20-25 seconds and he was ok afterwards. Nevertheless we took him to the hospital where they admitted him for observation purpose. They conducted blood tests, EEG, MRI and everything came normal. He was discharged later. Later we took him to Kaal Bhairav Mandir for Puja. He is completely ok now and this wasn't repeated.

Same year in August, my FIL, my SIL and her two daughters came to visit us. Let's call her elder daughter X and younger Y. X was 2 years and Y 11 months old. X was diagnosed borderline autistic and the main purpose of their visit was her treatment. X used to be engrossed in herself not making eye contact with anyone and not responding to anyone except rarely to her mother. It was also difficult to make X sleep and on certain nights she would look at different corners of the room and would laugh and smile as if playing with someone. My SIL felt uneasy to sleep alone so me and my son also slept in the same room (my husband was transferred and had joined duty in another city).

One night, X started looking at the walls again, laughing and all. My SIL held her tight inside her lap not allowing her to look there. But no matter how many times she tried, X would somehow manage to free herself and start doing the same thing. I ran out of my patience and started playing Hanuman Chalisa (prayer to hindu god Hanumanji which is renowned to scare away ghosts) on my phone. This calmed her a bit but then she went back to do the same thing. Then I remembered that I had holy water and oil from a priest. I brought it from another room and put it on X's forehead.

X seemed amazed for a few seconds but this calmed her down. Now she was sitting in her mother's lap, calm. I sprinkled the water and oil in the room, and also put it on the forehead of everyone in the room. While I was leaving the room to put the holy water and oil back to its place I looked back to see X looking at me in my eyes eerily.

When I came back I saw my SIL had laid X on the bed beside her. My son and Y were both asleep. It was around 4AM. I lied down next to X. My SIL was on one side of the bed, and me on the other side with X between us. I saw X who was calm but still looking at me. I felt a bit uneasy as she never used to make eye contact with anyone. Now I changed my position with my back towards her and turned off the light (night light was still on).

I felt tired and was about to sleep when I experienced typical sleep paralysis symptoms. I was not able to move, speak. It felt like somebody had grabbed me from back side. I was trying to call for help but all I could say was- uhh uhh.

I was really terrified, it didn't came to my mind that I should recite Hanuman chalisa or some other holy name, I don't know why. After sometime, my SIL called, " Bhabhi what happened?" And immediately I was ok. I put on the light and told her what happened, she told me that she was also listening to the sounds I made but was too afraid to call me. But when I continued doing so she gathered courage and called me. X was still awake but calm looking at us. I was so afraid that I couldn't sleep at all. My SIL and X slept after a while. I was shocked and terrified. I told this to my FIL when he woke up who didn't believe any supernatural angle to this incident and just laughed at us.

From the next day, we slept with lights on. But from then onwards my life changed. I started having scary nightmares. I was afraid of sleeping in the dark, whenever I switched off the light while sleeping I would feel somebody grabbing me from behind. I had similar dreams too.

My SIL and FIL returned to their native place 2 months later and we shifted to a new city. Although the city, home everything changed, my life has continued to be miserable- I lost my father, I and my son continued getting nightmares, I had fights with almost everyone close to me without any serious reason, even some of them casually stopped talking to me without any reason. I started feeling sad and lonely all the time although I am a loner and enjoy being alone. I and my husband had taken some advices and did remedial measures. They work but as soon as we stop doing it, my situation becomes the same although my son is better now.

I am sorry to say this but I sometimes feel that could it be my MIL affecting my life as I had a love-hate relationship with her or is there a possibility that she herself was attacked by some spirit which is affecting every family member since her death? Just before she had the stroke, she had purchased a land in her name which is said to be cursed and affects the owner of the land but my FIL and MIL didn't believe it. After my MILs death, I came to know later that my FIL had done some Puja secretly after getting the soil of that land checked by someone when he was in Varanasi but neither me nor my husband knows anything about it in detail and my FIL refuses to talk about it.

I seriously need advice as to what should I do to get back my normal life. Although I'm better now, I can't keep on doing cleansing rituals throughout my life. What should I do to free myself of this situation forever?

Is it even paranormal or am I just thinking too much?