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Fido The Unfriendly... Ghost?


This may not be the place to put this, as I am not entirely sure this is about a ghost. And there may be parts of it that are definitely astral. Almost certainly some of it is spiritual. But nevertheless it happened, and it wasn't fun, and so I will pop it here and let the mods decide if it needs moving. I don't tend to tell these stories much because, quite frankly, I am not sure I believe in ghosts. Don't get me wrong - I grew up in a family without scepticism. Ghost tours on holiday, plenty of things of note in the historical properties in which we lived over the years, and plenty of things I have experienced myself - but I still don't know that I know what causes them. However what I am going to relate definitely happened, and my son (Despite being now grown up, hairy, and pragmatic) will attest to them, and sometimes still won't sleep in the dark.

So I was 19 and my son 2.5 when we got housed in an awful 22 floor tower block in an awful part of London. Like the Grenfell Tower which just burned down, and London council estate like you would see in an English movie or cop show. It sucked.

Layout was that you entered from the lift lobby to face a storage cupboard and had to dog-leg left to go down the main hallway. Then it was (to the left) bedroom, bedroom, bathroom (right) toilet (right) and straight into the kitchen/ lounge.

Not long after moving in I started feeling uneasy about that hallway corner, between the entrance and the rest of the flat. And I began to very much get the sense of a dark mass in that area. Of course, I brushed it off, got on with the general business of being a very young unmarried mum, and certainly didn't ask or tell anyone.

However, my little boy, who had the first bedroom as you entered the flat, soon began to wake in the night screaming his head off. Of course I would rush in and calm him, and we bought him a dream catcher, but it happened quite regularly. And then one night I began to get woken. First time it happened I woke to a black, formless shape at the end of my bed which was 'speaking' to me. Not in words or any recognisable noise - more like a nonsense rumble of communication going straight to my brain.

I had some background with learning about the occult, spiritualism and such, and so I knew how to banish and how to white light, and so of course I pretty much white-flared it away. Then, every time my boy would wake screaming I pretty much knew what I was dealing with. I would leap up, march in there like some warrior queen and fling white fire and blue pentacles into the room. (But heavily tinged with love, because it's almost impossible for dark energy to fight against 'I love you, I wish you well, Now LEAVE!' if mentally thrown with force. At least in my experience)

And my son began to have fewer bad dreams. But I began to have many more experiences.

I would wake in the night frequently to find Fido in my room.

I once woke up because my stereo was on, and the song playing woke me. However when I blearily reached over to press the button to turn it off it lit up - it hadn't been on at all. NOW it lit up, but and now the music became minor key, discordant, and I realised that Fido was there again, closer than usual, almost within reach.

I had awful nightmares. I was a lucid dreamer, so dreams often felt like reality (I could pinch myself and just say 'ow!') and I would often wake from a dream into a dream into a dream... Always violent and always with a the black shapeless presence looming.

A few times I woke as clear as anything, got out of bed, went to the kitchen to get a glass of water (or the loo to go to the toilet), turned on the tap, poured a drink, took a cold wet sip (or shut the door, sat and peed), turned toward a window and saw the sky was all wrong outside - and Bang! Woke up in bed with Fido in the corner of the room.

This went on and on. Periodically defending my son, frequently defending myself.

My cat inexplicably decided to jump out of a hard to access window one day, plummeting 8 floors to its death.

My new best friend moved in for a few months. On one of her first nights with me we had been laughing about something when she went to the toilet. She came back in white as a sheet, looking horrified. 'Babe, I went to wash my hands and when I looked up there was this black shape behind me in the mirror.' I explained then, about Fido.

To be honest, it was definitely malevolent, but I always felt definitely stronger. If it could have actually harmed me it would have, I am certain, but it couldn't. Just scare the crap out of me and keep trying to get access for a few years. (I should say I went on to become a Wiccan in later years, and was a fairly strong White witch for a number of years until I moved to Australia and lost my connection with the land)

Other people reported feeling uneasy, many people claimed (although it was during parties, usually, and we were all young, in London, in the 90s, so most people weren't exactly unintoxicated) to see a shape jump from the window, or pass them in the hall. My best mate would always sit with her back to the wall and never went along the corridor alone at night. It wasn't a nice flatmate.

I can't be certain what Fido was, but I don't think it had ever been a person, so I wouldn't call it a ghost. I did once speak to someone who knew a number of astral travellers in London who, by all accounts, all knew very well to fly wide of the bridge - which was the landmark outside my window. And it can't be argued that all kinds of human misery and deprivation had happened over the years in the walls of those buildings so whether it was cause or effect I wouldn't like to say.

Anyway, I got rid of him in the end. And I have never experienced the like again. So that's good.:) And when my Son moves into a new place if he gets any odd feelings he rings me and says 'Muuum, do you think I need some sage? I mean, its no Fido...'

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, expathistorical, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Bibliothecarius (9 stories) (1091 posts)
5 years ago (2019-03-25)
Thanks, RC!

Feel free to provide Biblio-to-colloquial English subtitles as you see fit... 😆

RSAChick (115 posts)
5 years ago (2019-03-25)
Biblio, it was beautiful to read about your own journey of belonging and "living this country and its landscape".

I have such a yearning to feel this same way about my country of birth and certainly think it is possible in beautiful South Africa. It is something that I would like to explore this year.

Thank you for your kind and genuine advice to expat. It has given me some food for thought.
RCRuskin (9 stories) (834 posts)
5 years ago (2019-03-25)
I think I understand what you're getting at, Biblio. I'll let my hubris out and see if I can simplify your idea?

Having been born in England, as was our OP expathistorical, you know the land: its obvious to anyone who is not blind features, plus all those little details. One hill is like any other hill, yet it also has its own features: nooks, crannies, very tiny undulations that change how the wind and the water, and life, flows on this hill as opposed to that one.

When you moved to a new place, you took some time to feel, sense, and learn how its geography is, and how this energy flows. So, while you may not be as 'home' here in the US as in England, you can still 'be' present in it.

I lived in Ohio for a while; a state very different from the place I call home, Pennsylvania, though New York State is my home. I don't want to be in NY; did not want to be in Ohio, but that was my location at the time, so I realized had better exist there. Now that I have moved out of Ohio, I need to exist where I am.
Bibliothecarius (9 stories) (1091 posts)
5 years ago (2019-03-24)
Greetings, expathistorical, and welcome to YGS.

You are fortunate; your conviction gave you the strength to resist whatever "Fido" was attempting. All too often, people give in to the fear first, then have no way of dealing with the problem. Normally, I'd advise against giving a shadow entity or disgruntled spirit a name, but this is a situation from your past, not your present.

I'm concerned about your statement that you were, "a fairly strong White witch for a number of years until I moved to Australia and lost my connection with the land." I know that England, for the right kind of person, is more than a land; it's a sense of belonging that curls around your joints and wraps around your bones. I notice it when I'm back; not so much in the concrete chaos of Heathrow or Gatwick airports, obviously, but out in the green of the Midlands and the West Country. I can even feel it in greater metropolitan London, as the Thames churns through the city bringing raw nature along; I've felt it in some of the deeper Tube stations, too. (I do hope this makes sense to you, as I suspect it makes me sound *really* strange...)

I now live in the Eastern United States. I'm very happy here. It took me about 8 years to get used to living this country and its landscape, but I did learn. I adapted. I learned to feel the American landscape; perhaps not as strongly as my innate childhood embrace of Albion's rich soil, slate, and clay, but the American continent has power all its own. It took me time and effort to accomplish, but I did get used to living --and understanding-- in this environment.

Your move to Australia seems to have been a traumatic experience for you on a spiritual level. Have you tried to connect with the Australian environment? Opening up and expecting the same senses you felt in England will not work; the mechanism is the same, but the materials will be different textures, new scents, resonating with a life that is there, should you try to meet it on its own terms.

I'm not saying that this is going to happen instantly or easily (I've yet to come to terms with American fir trees, but most of the deciduous ones are fine). I am saying that you've distanced yourself *physically* from England, but *spiritually* from Australia; you've not lost your ability to connect to the land, you've failed to translate the language of the landscape into an understanding. This is not supposed to be a rebuke or critique, merely a suggestion that you can reclaim what you had through learning where you are.


P.S.: If I misunderstood your point and I've offended you, I apologize. Sometimes I write out peculiar sentence that confuse people; this time I'm afraid it is peculiar *paragraphs*!
RCRuskin (9 stories) (834 posts)
5 years ago (2019-03-23)
Hi, expathistorical. I don't have much to say about Fido, but two observations on your experience.

1. If your building was brutalist architecture,, I'd be grouchy about living in it too.

2. "I would leap up, march in there like some warrior queen and fling white fire and blue pentacles into the room." I love the image this creates!

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