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Accept The White Light


In my absence from this site, I have had a few mind and life altering experiences. For those of you who are not familiar with my line of work, I am/was in the medical field, but only in name. I have no real medical training, only the bits I picked up from the tid-bits of training, personal research, and being in the right place to eavesdrop on the appropriate people while caring for my clients. Most of my clients are the elderly, and I have had a few Spiritual experiences through or with them.

On the day of the experience that I am about to share with you, I was with one of my middle aged clients. We were visiting and enjoying each others' company when he suddenly began showing signs of a heart attack. As he is deaf, he could not let me know all of his symptoms, as BOTH of his hands and arms would not allow him to talk to me. In sign language there are many words that require both hands for communication. I called the paramedics and we were off to the hospital (I had to follow in my personal vehicle, with flashing light, as I was not a family member and it is against regulations that I ride in the ambulance with him).

As we were flying down State Road 119 in between the cities of Nappanee and Wakarusa we were approaching a busy intersection. As we slowed (again, I was following the ambulance with no siren, only the flashing light a-fixed to the cars roof) the ambulance attendant radioed me a short warning of a motorcyclist that seemed a bit impatient as he had started forward, stopped and again started forward. I watched in horror as he tried to run through the intersection between the ambulance and myself.

I swerved to the left while applying the brakes in a vain attempt to avoid hitting the young man. Leaving out many details, as I was following an ambulance, help was soon, on the scene. When they arrived I succumbed to the concussion that I received and slipped into unconsciousness beside the young man.

When I finally came to, I had apparently been in and out of consciousness for a few days. The hospital staff treated me as a highly contagious patient, even though I worked with them regularly and knew almost all of them by name. I thought this a bit odd, but then; now I was a patient, and not a work associate.

What I was filled in on, is that while suffering several broken and fractured bones and a concussion that should have put me in a comatose state, I had somehow travelled the forty feet to this young man who was thrown out into the road. I was trying to help him despite the obvious incapacitation due to my position, but my attempts were for naught. As the group of EMT's rushed to us, one of them overheard me say, what she thought was, "Accept the White Light" while lightly holding onto the young man's arm.

While staying in the hospital, according to my records, I have suffered severe hallucinations and (what are termed as) mal-visions of those in my life who have passed. I carried on complete conversations with them, and the last words recorded that I said while being in and out of THIS timeframe were "I know I have to rest. I still have work to do..."

A day later, my concussion released its strongest hold and I woke up to the battery of questions that everyone coming out of consciousness are subjected to.

I am still receiving medical care, but will soon be released to assume my convalescence at home.

In the meantime, I still have many unseen friends and relatives visiting with me. My son tells me to tell them all to wait, that they are preventing me from returning home. My roommate tells me she sees their shadows, but nothing more, and knows that I am not crazy. That in itself allows me the knowledge that this is not simply a hallucination. The hospital staff is being very patient and trying to re-explain to me the workings of a concussion while imploring me to take different forms of medication.

What this experience has taught me is that we all have our views of what is really going on in the world that surrounds us. We all think we know what the fabric of the air holds. Until we truly test that knowledge, we never really see what is there in the wrinkles or shadows of what is ALWAYS there. I only wish that I had all of the equipment necessary to document at least a few of these experiences.

By the way, I KNOW that what I told the young motorcyclist was actually "Accept the White Light", even though I do not recall uttering the words.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, whitebuffalo, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

NaturalScience (3 posts)
14 years ago (2010-10-06)
Hi Whitebuffalo, I signed up on this site here because of you whom I recognize as a Native American with authentic knowledge of your indigenous spiritual tradition. I got a friend who lives in Canada half of year and in Germany other half. She is in close contact with Native Americans and brought me once into contact with a Lakota she-shaman, Christine Crow Dog. From her I know the Name of God the Native Americans use, WaakanTanka, Great Mystery, which seems to me the most honest name that Man ever gave to the Great Formless One.
For all the wisdom you spread on this site I say with all my heart:
rhodes68 (14 stories) (1596 posts)
15 years ago (2009-02-01)
Kirie toeleossou iston eona taerga tonhironsou mipatridis. Proshes istin voithianmou Kirie tissotiriasmou.
whitebuffalo (guest)
15 years ago (2009-02-01)
In the Name of The Great Spirit,
And by the power of His Blood and His Mercy,
We bind all spirits in the air, and the fire and the water,
In the ground and the underground and the nether world,
And we bind any satanic forces of nature.
We bind all curses, hexes, or spells, or any occult activity previously used.
We bind the interaction and interplay of spirits.
And we claim the protection
Of the Great Spirit
Over this house and grounds, and over every person here.
We call upon the ancestors of the land
And the company of angels to surround this place,
Making it both safe and sacred.
And we call out to you, O Great Spirit.
Come now and fill this place, never to leave!
We pray in the name of the Great Spirit, Amen.
autumnsmommy (4 stories) (98 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-30)
It does only matter what's in your heart. It was every well put by that 14 year. The singing, can you pin point the tune? What feeling are you having, is it sad, hurt, mad, angry, happy? When the singing starts embrace the music. Embrace what it the melody is, understand the feeling of the music and then you will be able to understand why you are having the emotions that you are having. If the melody and tone of the music is sad that could explain the saddness. I fyou listen to it then maybe that will help you understand why it came to you. Either someone that you once knew that has passed is trying to communicate with you through this song or some other spirit is trying to communicate with you. All you have to do is look inside yourself when the music starts. That might help you understand more things about it.

The "connection" or "something" that makes you have that great friendship is a feeling that only you know. You may not understand why it is there, but it is meant to be if you are feeling it. Trust the next time you feel it.
Wildone (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-30)
I think the thing that saves me from loosing friendships over this, autumnsmommy, is that I have been a traveler for so long. I do not make friends easily, and when I do, it seems like they are expecting something from me. Something I can not provide. BUT, When I do find a "connection", it is usually steadfast.
I have not the faintest idea of what that "something" might be. I have tried to come up with a concrete answer, but nothing is written in stone, no matter where I look.
I knew a girl once, who was so different than anyone I ever knew before her. We hit off a friendship like gangbusters. She was out of my league (and still is) BUT she did not care where I came FROM, she always said it did not matter. What mattered was what was in your heart. THAT from a 14 year old!
Do you KNOW how many people like that you can meet in a lifetime?
The singing...
What can I do to see it more clearly? What can I do to ACCEPT it? So many people on this site are just so matter of fact, where is the emotion I am FEELING when all this happens? Does it GET to the point when it will not matter, and I can be matter of fact too?
autumnsmommy (4 stories) (98 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-30)
I understand where you are coming from Wildone. The same has happened to me and I have lost a lot friendships over it. Then there are people that embrace what gift I have been given. I agree with Whitebuffalo totally. How you deal with whatever situtation you are put against and how you handle it is what everyone notices. Everyone is drawn to someone in some way or another. May it be by a name or by the advice that they give someone. Trust whitebuffalo. I promise everything will work out alright.

I ask myself questions like that all the time. About my grandfather, people that I once knew. You are a great person and I can tell that just by the advice that you have given me and the way that you have helped many others on this site. You may always ask yourself these questions and you may always have those nightmares. Everything will eventually calm down and you will realize that no matter how you look at the situation it was in some way supposed to happen like that.

Best of Luck and many wishes
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-30)
I find it interesting Wildone, that you used one of the same phrases in your comment to me as I used in my second to last comment to autumnsmommy. You said you are drawn to certain personalities (I said I was drawn to her name).
IF your feeling of being drawn to people is the same as mine, and there is no telling if that is true or not, there is MOST GENERALLY a reason for that "pull".
I am a bit confused as to your question, however. Are you asking me how to make people more comfortable around you? Or are you asking me how to deal with the unseen and unheard by others?
If you are asking the first, I believe that we are all created from an energy source that does determine certain attributes of our personality. I further believe that the choices we make, the thought patterns we have, the way we relate to others MAKES up our personality. There are some VERY friendly and fun loving people out there that simply can not break out of their shell, and are considered unreachable.
It is how we look at ourselves that others pick up on. If we think we are "weird" we tend to stay away from situations that would put us out in front where we are noticed. If we think we are "the bomb" we tend to be on this committee and that, IN the limelight.
People notice that.
As for the second thought on your question.
Boy, I tell you in all honesty, how YOU deal with what others perceive you as is a purely PERSONAL thing. I personally do not let it bother me if I am standing in the local NAPA store and someone sees that I have turned to a sound they did not notice.
Big Whoop.
I am not too very concerned of what others think of ME. That is not why the Great Spirit blessed me with life. What WOULD concern me (only in that you have written it) is WHY is this singing only heard by YOU? IS this a ghost who is trying to get your attention? WHY did the experience follow you when you moved?
Without knowing enough of the tale (you only gave so many words of it) it would be hard to determine what is going on there. Perhaps you could try submitting it, in it's entirety to be read through fully?
I WOULD look forward to reading it. And would LOVE to help you out with it, if it is within my abilities.
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-30)
Exactly. But to tell you the truth, he DOES still "haunt" my dreams. I still hear the sound of crashing metal, and hear the scream of the sirens. But I KNOW that is but a dream. That is all my own making, as I feel that there MAY have been something further that I could have done to avoid hitting him.
I swerved left. Should I have gone to the right and off the road?
I slammed on the breaks. Should I have kept going at the speed I was and hoped that I could miss him at the last second like in a game of chicken?
I WILL never know those answers, as I refuse to even THINK of reliving it all and starting over.
Thank you so much. You are so very kind.
autumnsmommy (4 stories) (98 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-29)
I think in some way he will be better off. I understand where you were coming from when you didn't want me to wander on the street that he had made that ba decision on. It was beacuse of that decision that he is no longer with us. Because you were there you made it easier for him to leave this earth without any regrets to his own actions.

That is a very powerful thing. Not everyone would be more concerned for someone else's well being over their own. Even though you had no idea at the time that you had done it, you were still in the state of mind that meant the most, for that I commend you greatly on. If it wasn't for this then that young man's mistake in judgement would haunt you to this day.
Best of luck and best wishes
Wildone (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-29)
I really have something that I need help working through. I have been drawn to your name, and while looking through your profile, you MAY be the person I am looking for that I feel can really help.
There have been several times in my life when I have felt out of place. Like I am SUPPOSED to be somewhere else, or doing something else. I figured I was just a restless type of guy, so I traveled around a lot trying to find my niche in life. Working here and there making just enough to live on, and then moving on.
I am drawn to certain personalities. I do not know when it will happen, it just does, and when it does, it is usually a super glue type of friendship. Interesting, but not imperative.
Recently I was with a group of people, and I was the only one who could hear a soft singing. I kept looking for the source, but could not find it. I have moved from that place, but still the soft singing is heard by me, and me alone.
People think the worse of me when they notice that I am tuning into something that they can not hear. People shy away from me when they notice that I can see some things that they can't, or know things before they happen.
What is the best way to approach this? You have such a firm handle on just about every situation that you write about. Does that only work with what you write, or do you KNOW things?
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-26)
You know Kim, you have been around here quite a while, as well. I have been known for saying "I am here in this time, this space, and this exact moment for a reason." I guess there was a time when I was needed some place other than where I was comfortable.
I can not choose where the Great Spirit will use me, I can only pray that I am ready when He calls my name to service. I was very fortunate that I was the one He hand picked to hold this young man's arm when he was so frightened. I have been blessed by the experience, though it was and still is extremely saddening.
Thank you for your support, and your prayers as well, as I know you added me to them. ๐Ÿ˜Š

Thank you, autumnsmommy. I feel drawn to your name, as Autumn is the one I go by ๐Ÿ˜Š. My biggest fear, at that moment, was that this poor young man would be forced to wander the street that he made such a rash and irreversable mistake on. I could not have that.
We all make mistakes. To spend the time when you are life impaired aimlessly walking, or riding, where it is obvious you are not meant to be, would have been punishment far beyond what a bad decision would warrent.
My injuries were nothing. His cost him everything.
Thank you for reading, and lending your support.
autumnsmommy (4 stories) (98 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-26)

I am soooo sorry to hear about your accident. These story is truly amazing. Among seeing the others, you were trying to help the young motorcyclist long. Almost knowing that he would not have made it. I'm glad that you are doing better and I wish you all the best luck. Much best wishes!
KimSouthO (27 stories) (1960 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-26)
Wow! I have been a bit delayed in reading some of these stories and I am very glad I came back to this one!

I had no idea you had been injured! We are so lucky and blessed that you are still with us! Not quite as lucky as the young man on the motorcycle that it was YOU who was there and not someone else. When you knew it was time for him to cross, you were able to help direct him even with a myriad of injuries! He is truly blessed that it was you that were there.

If I can state my humble opinion, when you were lying there having your visits, it is possible that the family and friends were there trying to guide you to the light, but as your prophetic words state, you still have a lot of work to do.

I admire your stength and wisom!

I do hope that physically and emotionally you are doing better now,

God Bless!
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-26)
Thank you, livvy_poolekirkby. I greatly appreciate all of the support I have received from all directions that I have been getting it.
Please DO check out the rest of my life in writing. I hope you will be able to see a growth in me, as I came to accept what it is that I did not understand.
livvy_poolekirkby (1 stories) (12 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-26)
Hi Whitebuffalo
I have just read this story, and like many others I am going to read the rest of your stories.
I really am deeply sorry for the accident you had, and I will pray for you to get better.
God Bless
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-20)
Hello Staci13, and thank you for getting around to seeing one of my experiences. I could have pointed out one a bit less heart wrenching for the first one, though ๐Ÿ˜Š.
We ALL have it in us to do what needs to be done. We just have to shut out the outside influences that tell us not to. We have to stop listening to the news reports telling us of another good Samaritan that has been sued as someone's family member obtained additional injuries due to their assistance (not all people are that greedy, or just plain rude), we have to stop thinking of the ailments that could befall US.
I did nothing that I would not wish someone to do for one of my own children. I did nothing special, only what I COULD.
Thank you for reading.
staci13 (2 stories) (5 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-19)
Hi, this is the only post of yours that I've read, and I must admit that it made me cry. People like you keep that balance on earth, you give all of us a good name. I hope you feel better very soon.
Staci x x
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-19)
Thank you Vicki.
You can come to any of my pages, any time, stay as long as you like, no matter HOW "old" they are ๐Ÿ˜Š. I still go through all of my stories in my mind trying to decide if I merely have a chemical imbalance (that I have passed on to my children) that has caused these instances.
I welcome any thoughts as to what was going on, as it helps me interject a different thought into my recollection of the time.
I feel blessed to have had this final conversation with this young man, and sometime, I may actually write the story of what was experienced between the time I first touched his arm to when I felt the last beat of his pulse.
But THAT still tugs at my heart and makes me weep.
Thanks again.
Brownie09 (6 stories) (293 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-18)
Hi WB, sorry I just ran across this this story. I think it was your way of helping him to accept, that he would be safe and protected in a better place where he wouldn't have to suffer, by telling him to follow the white light.

Thanks for the story. ๐Ÿ˜Š
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-18)
Thank you, sylviessweeties.
I guess you could say that I have a soft heart for the human condition. I can not take all of the credit for that. The Great Spirit created me the way I am, and I only try to get a bit closer to the way He REALLY wants me to be.
To be honest, it came as second nature. There was no thought process, I just did it. Sometimes we just have those moments when our heart wins over our brain and we are able to fool it into thinking that there is nothing wrong with US, we just have to care for someone else.
Thank you for reading my story.
sylviessweeties (135 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-18)
your awesome to help out someone like you did what a kind compassionate soul you are!
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-14)
Hi Wingrin1,
Unfortunately, after e-mailing you back, I think you MAY have "blinked out" on me. If you are still around, feel free to e-mail me.
Thank you.
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-09-14)
Hi lilblackpom. I LOVE your name. Every time I see it, I have to take a second look to make certain that last letter really IS an "m". ๐Ÿ˜Š
Thank you for your prayers. This site is so wonderful with all of the people who have sent me healing e-mails and cheery messages, it is getting much easier to get up in the morning. Therapy days are disastrous, of course, but who REALLY likes for someone to stretch more than what their body thinks it can at that time?
Thank you, again.
Wingrin1 (1 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-02)
Hi Autumn

My friend Holly has asked me to contact you, and that you are expecting to hear from me. You sound like you've had many and varied experiences. I've had a few myself, and understand how draining some of yours must be.

All the best
lilblackpom (13 stories) (218 posts)
16 years ago (2008-09-01)
Hello whitebuffalo. Going through more stories tonight, I came upon this one. Sorry about this incident. My thoughts and prayers are with you. This probably explains why you aren't feeling well lately, I didn't read this story. Get well! โค
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-08-29)
Please resend it. I was starting to think that work has been a bit rough on you, so I was giving you time to "heal". ๐Ÿ˜Š I will anxiously wait for it!
Peace and Thank you my friend.
FRAWIN (guest)
16 years ago (2008-08-28)
Autumn, did you get my last message I sent you on frappr, I gave you the info you asked for-should I resend it.
ChrisB (6 stories) (1515 posts)
16 years ago (2008-08-04)
Hi Automn. It is nice to hear that your home and with your family ๐Ÿ˜.I guess it will take time to catch up but you were here with us all the time. We never forget about carring people ๐Ÿ˜‰.But don't spend too much time on the computer because they can heart your eyes ๐Ÿ˜†! IU hope I'm not sounding like a parent but I hope this would cheer you up:) I hop to hear from you soon and take care
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-07-31)
Thank you, Annie. I may be up to my old "devils advocate" self in a few, but for now, I guess I will sit and lick my wounds while trying to catch up. I have already been accussed of being less than sensitive in calling someone less than truthful, so...

I guess I AM back.
Annie (202 posts)
16 years ago (2008-07-30)
I'm so glad to hear you're home. Rest. Take care of yourself, and let others take care of you. I's hard to do. So, just try to let it happen. We'll look forward to hearing from you as you "veg" in front of your computer. Bless you! โค

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