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Wife Possessed By Mother's Ghost?


First a little background on my wife's family: My wife moved from Korea to Hawaii with her dad and sister about 5 years ago, soon after her mom died of cancer (she was in her 40's/50's). It wasn't a peaceful death - the mom seemed to have lots of regrets concerning her daughters. Her parents loved each other but both had affairs during their time together (including around the time of death), and the daughters (my wife and her sister) were considered the most important and always taken care of the best. There are some other issues that within the family, like depression, anger, alcohol problems, etc. That mainly occurred afterwards and have seemed fixed themselves after a few years, but I don't think they matter in this case.

Since her mom died my wife has seen ghosts, had strange dreams, and flickering/powering off of electronics in her home. Including one time she was lifted in her sleep and felt a warm feeling all over her body shortly after a suicide attempt, which she quit mid-way because she thought of her sister.

Anyway. This is what happened to us a few days ago.

We've been married about 7 months, and during that time we've had some fights - some severe and some not. Things have mostly settled down and we are beginning to really enjoy married life now, but one day she started calmly telling me something that she felt hurt about (with no reason, it just popped into her head).

After listening to her concerns for about an hour, she slowly started to get more and more aggravated while I remained calm until finally her voice changed slightly and she started yelling at me saying that she was her mom, and that I better treat her daughter right, or she's going to do something (I didn't quit understand what because her voice was ridiculous). Anyway, suddenly my wife stopped and asked if she just did something crazy, then just started crying uncontrollably.

From that point on, for the next 5-10 minutes or so, my wife kept seeing shadowy figures in the room (not humanoid). These included some stringy things dangling from the ceiling, a face staring at her from right behind me (like right over my shoulder) and a strange hand next to her face (on the right of her).

I was surprised to hear that this isn't the first case my wife has had with something like this (her mom supposedly possessing her body and communicating). She also said on her sister's birthday she was looking at a clock and suddenly lost her memory. According to her sister, she suddenly hugged her (they're sisters, but usually don't hug - so she was startled) and started saying their mom was so proud of her, then she came back to her normal self again. She doesn't remember what happened during that period of time though.

She also has had many occasions where her mom appears in her dream, but cannot talk.

Is this really my wife's mom possessing my wife? I'm worried that her mom or whatever it is will interfere with our relationship. Obviously the way a mom feels about her daughter's relationship with her son-in-law and how my wife feels about our relationship will be different. The mom is obviously also going to be very protective and/or overprotective.

What do you guys think the cause of this is? Is it my wife's mother's ghost that possessed her for a moment? What should I do? I'm not totally familiar with Korean traditional ancestor worship, but is there some sort of way I should be honoring her mother?

I just don't know what's going on at the moment, but for now, we've started going to church regularly, praying together, and trying to work through these times.

Thank you.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, hunterfx21, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

Babalawoodemata (guest)
10 years ago (2013-04-18)
Hunterfx21 go to 6 year old story and follow what left her in the comment it will go away and everything will stop if you need stronger help let me know.
zzsgranny (18 stories) (3327 posts) mod
10 years ago (2012-08-28)
hunterfx21: I was gonn'a say something, but everybody here knows I'm not one to correct anybody else's math... LOL 😆 😆
hunterfx21 (1 stories) (3 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-28)
FYI - that last post is supposed to be 95% and 5%.

Sorry about that! 😕
hunterfx21 (1 stories) (3 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-28)
Pjod [at] She had a rough time dealing with it. But has gotten over much of the pain. However, she still feels sad when she starts missing her.

Lakota73 [at] Thank you for your input. Praying in the name of Jesus has been the best solution for it so far - but we still are under attack by something. We get over it through prayer though.

Aproxyte [at] My wife's mom was always wavering between being a Buddhist and Christian. She said her mom felt like she was under attack by a spirit which is why she started going to church and eventually became a struggling Christian (but going to church helped her mom stop the spiritual attacks).

NOTE: One of my wife's friends also said she had a similar experience seeing dark cloudy shapes. She also said that these sightings decreased the more she became active in church.
hunterfx21 (1 stories) (3 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-28)
Well, I'm confident my wife is in the right state of mind - she's fine about 95% of the time. And the remaining 10% of the time when something like this happens, or she starts getting agitated we pray and it goes away.

I forgot to mention as well that the night this happened we prayed together in the name of Jesus and as we prayed she said she felt something move through her body - from her feet to her head and she said it felt like it left through the top of her. My wife occasionally hears whispers and feels like she's getting pinched in these occasions.

Also to note, as I was praying I felt a very oppressive feeling all around me - I definitely felt something spiritual.

Thank you for your concerns for my wife's mental health - although she's had a rough childhood, I am 100% convinced this is not a mental thing.

There is or at least was something in our house.
Aproxyte (10 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-26) in all Asian cultures (I'm an Asian btw) filial piety is a core virtue that is heavily imbed in most Asians. I hope the site helps you and from my point of view, she's deffinitely haunted by her mum and "just telling it to leave you both alone" will cause more harm then good. Perhaps by understanding her culture more and getting a priest from her own people (IF you can that is, seeing that you both live in Hawaii it's understandable if you are not able to find one, I'd rope in her family members to help or suggest) to help her. Just my ten cents worth. I rarely comment:)
Jesus_soldier (guest)
10 years ago (2012-08-26)
I agree with the other posters. You need to gett your wife checked out before we try to solve anything in the paranormal field. Please keep us updated, and you two are in my prayers.

JS aka Brandon
JavaJenn (1 stories) (4 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-25)
I'd suggest you take your wife to a psychiatrist and rule out any psychological probs she may have before considering this a paranormal occurrence.

Lakota73 (5 stories) (108 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-25)

Are you deliberately trying to get slung off this site?

I don't know you, but some of your comments are bit too straight to the point.
Miracles51031 (39 stories) (4999 posts) mod
10 years ago (2012-08-24)
hunterfx - my thoughts are along the same line as Pjod's. Is your wife taking any medications? Some medications have side effects which may be causing your wife to react the way she is. Whatever is going on, please check into the normal, every day things before thinking it's something paranormal.
Lakota73 (5 stories) (108 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-24)

I don't doubt something is happening to your wife, but maybe Pjod is right in saying a doctor should be visited to eliminate any underlying health issues.

People from different cultures have different beliefs sbout the spirit world and maybe your wife acts out what she truly believes to be the case herself and not the opinions of a spirit.

If it is paranormal then it is a serious issue for you and your wife and I would ask the possessing spirit to calmly leave. Now it may be your mother-in-
Law or another harmless spirit, but the fact is you don't want it to interrupt your marriage and lives.

Nevertheless, do seek medical advice for your wife first before you go investigating paranormal causes. All other causes have to be considered.

Hope my views have helped.

Lakota73 😊
Pjod (3 stories) (978 posts)
10 years ago (2012-08-24)
One question- other than your wife's behavior, have you seen or heard anything unusual? This all sounds to me like your wife may have some mental issues. Attempted suicide- might have been a call for help/attention, as well as the mother's spirit "taking over" -Has she been having a rough time dealing with her mom's passing?
I'd really start looking for a doctor to check her out before anything else.

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