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Mama's Helper


My Mama is a strong woman. She has gone through so much in her life that she has examples and warnings for just about every situation that anyone goes through. She just doesn't like to share all of her experiences. She says that some people just have to learn through the experience, and not from someone else's.

She always tries to help out us kids. All five of us. I have two step sisters (and one nephew) and one step brother. She loves them as much as she loves my brother and me, even if they don't live with us. She has fought for them, even when their Mama didn't see the need to.

Mama hardly ever asks for help, but here recently she did. While we were having dinner one night she explained that she would be working long hours and would like it if we could help with some of the housework for a few weeks. Of course we all said we would, but when it came down to it, she would come home and still have a lot of the work to do. We can't do the job as well as Mama, guess that's why she's the Mama.

Mama had to go through a few boxes that were left after my Papa passed away in November. She kept putting it off saying that she didn't want his ending to be final. Maybe she thought if the boxes were still there, so would Papa.

She sent us into the family room to watch television, telling me that she just needed some time to go through some things. That was strange as she never sends us to watch television. She would rather us read books, or play games. I needed something so I went to her bedroom door.

She was sitting on her bed with a box on her left and crying. That scared me, cause she never cries. I know she had a hard time with my Papa's death, she was holding his hand when he went and even passed out when the guys with the bag came in the house to get him. So I stayed where I was and watched her. I did not know what to do. She tilted her head to the right and kind of whispered "what?" and I watched the right corner of her bed sink in. All I really remember hearing her say was that she needed help, and she could not do this all on her own.

Mama sat on her bed and talked to someone for a while and then she tilted her chin up, and took a deep breath just like she always tells us to do when we need to regroup. She wiped her tears away, smiled and said "Thank you, I needed you" and put the box away.

I ran away from the door. I didn't want her to know I saw anything. I think she sees and hears things that she does not want us to know about, and gets a lot of help from the other side.

I just wish she would tell me from who.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, essiej, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Sundaydrive (49 posts)
14 years ago (2010-02-20)
Oh, Essie. Honey, your Papa was a special man, and one that your Mama learned a lot from. He taught her patience (think of his personality), love, kindness and how to be still. That is very important in all of your lives, right? While your Dad is right there by her side, losing your Papa was like her losing one of her kids. Near the end, she had to do everything FOR him, including carry him in to the bathroom.
Sweetie, I know you read here still, so listen up. Your Mama IS a very strong woman. Think back on all of the things that you witnessed her going through, the confrontations, having to prove herself, just everything. People take ONE look at her and misgauge who she is, by her looks. A person HAS to be strong to overcome that.
While Papa's death was still very fresh in her heart, the fact that she KNOWS where he is fills that spot.
I am blessed. I just got done reading through your Dad's story and now yours. Your Mama is a wonderfully gifted woman and she is so very honored by the Spirits in having the family she has.
Auntie Anne
ghostreader1000 (34 posts)
15 years ago (2009-02-01)
Life is unfair and will always be mommas are strong and when the husband passes away then they have to be stronger. Your mom is a strong woman and will always be the fact that she talks when no one is there I truely believe that your dad is there giving her some comfort. Seems like to me he is trying to ease your mothers pain and to try to go on with life she will explain in full detail to you when she is ready and when she thinks that you are ready to undersatnd it not saying that you are not ready now but she has to feel that you are ready. I pray that your mom finds peace and I am truely sorry for your families loss. May God Bless you and your family. Talk to your mom and see if she will call someone who deals with spirits and see if they can help.

Pass this along to your mom:

When life is troubled and confusing Lay your worries on the shoulders of God and ask for peace and understanding for what confuses you the most. Seek the refuge and the peace that will give you rest and help you to undersatnd what happens in life that is unfair.

I know that your father is in a better place he just wants your mother and all of you to be at peace
Wildone (guest)
16 years ago (2008-10-20)
I think you are right and that your Mama sees things that she does not share. I knew her ages ago when she was younger than you, and even there she seemed to have a quality about her that just... Shined.
I read through the rest of the comments and it sounds like most of the others know her pretty well too. Once, when we were young, she was strong and independent. She needed to be challenged daily and where there was no real challenge she seemed to go out looking for one.
At this time, when someone looses someone as close to them as it sounds like your papa was, it takes time to make you want to talk to others about the experience. Maybe she is holding onto the memory as something only they can share. Maybe she will share it with you. I think she will eventually.
racemustang (guest)
16 years ago (2008-05-12)
Your Mama is a strong woman. She has had to go through some things that a lesser person would have crumbled under the weight of. What she has also done, though, is to build protective barriers. She gives of herself so completely, that when she gives a friendship, she has given away a part of her heart. She needs to be careful, and to protect herself from the things that she is not positive will be hidden in the future. She is not trying to hurt or confuse you. She is gathering facts. You know her, without her research, she has nothing to fight with. Without her research she will not fight. She needs to be sure this is not something she needs to fight.
essiej (guest)
16 years ago (2008-04-01)
I just wanted to say I talked to Mama and she explaned some things for me. She is working with some friends to try and figure out what new things she is going through cause she doesn't understand it all yet. Believe this, if Mama doesn't know something she keeps looking until she finds it out. Thanks eveybody.
AllieRN (1 stories) (26 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-23)
What a beautiful heartfelt story! I really enjoyed it! Just be patient like everyone else has said and remember that every womans heart is full of many secrets! Some we share and some we never will. You just need to respect that in your mama and know she loves you very much. There is nothing that can ever take away a mother's love!

rhodes68 (14 stories) (1596 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-22)
essiej, pardon my interruption 😳.

I just wanted to give a warm welcome to mrsfrawin and tell her that I'm so very glad to have her among us 😊.Also, I would like to say, thank you for this post as it has answered a few of my questions concerning my own life and a person I dearly love.

Welcome once again.
mrsfrawin (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-22)
hi essie,
thanks for a wonderful story. I don't think your mama is trying to shut you out or anything like that but sometimes the little talks we have with those who have gone on before are just too private. We can share parts of it but not all. As for myself a lot of my interaction with those beings are emotions and it's hard to try to explain when you are forced to feel what someone else has felt before they died. However I don't think that is the problem your mama has right now. And I don't think you need to worry about your papa. If you ever need him I think he will be there for you too. I do know he loved you a lot.

good luck
FRAWIN (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-21)
Hello Essie. I don't think you have to worry about your Mama. Because she doesn't talk about it doesn't mean she hiding anything from you. Before anyone can tell you what's going on with them, they have to have things straight in their own minds. Give her time to get everything sorted out and sit down and talk to her. Explain why it's important to you that she share this with you. Tell her that it's out of your love for her, not just curiosity, that you need to know.
As far as who it is she's talking to, I think you already know-you just need confirmation. When she tells you who it is, don't expect her to tell you EVERYTHING they talk about-as I've said before some conversations are private. As you may or may not know my wife is an non-practicing empathic medium and "talks" to the other side. Some of her conversations she shares with me, some she don't because they are private. I have learned not to feel shut out when she chooses to remain silent. We have learned to be each others ANCHORS - to hold each other fast when one of us starts drifting.
As for her not putting it on this site, well some experiences you need to be selfish with.
Take care essie and be patient- All in good time.

whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-21)
You saw all of that?
Did you see who was sitting on Mama's bed, or hear the responding voice? Can you think who it would be that Mama would NEED who is not present in your home?
I like how you added Mama's grandchild to the story 😊.
In your first paragraph you wrote something that keeps running through my head, to be honest, this whole story is running through my head, but you point out one thing that is almost like a neon light, you just have to flip the switch, Princess.
You wrote "She just doesn't like to share all of her experiences..." Do YOU know why? It sounds like you do.
Here is a bit of thought on all of this.
First: Talk to Mama. Tell her WHY this is appearing to weigh heavily on your mind. With all of the things that you have seen and heard, I would think that you would understand why Mama's first experience with a Spirit that communicates with her is a bit... Guarded. Mama has to get used to the idea that she is NOT talking to herself...
I was just reading through your last comment, and I know you did not ask me these questions, but I thought to answer them from my point of view 😊.
As for the question to Kim (by the way, I believe she is the right person to have asked that question of). Yes, Job lost everything. He lost absolutely ALL of his material possessions, and the only way of life that he knew as a means of support for himself and his family. What he DID NOT loose was his sight of the most IMPORTANT thing, his relationship with his Higher Power. In the grand scheme of things, that is all that matters. We may loose everything that we THINK is important, but one thing stands true. We MUST have faith.
For the question to "Mr FRAWIN", I am not sure I can answer that one as it is a personal opinion that you request. But for the part that I CAN, Maybe Mama is not HIDING anything from you, maybe it never occurred to her that you might have seen any of that. And- 😉- not ALL of the things that people experience are put on this site.
In short (yeah, RIGHT), I believe you have NOTHING to worry about. Mama will NEVER think that ghosts are more important than her children. NONE of them. That almost four month old baby grandson will keep her grounded if things start to tip the scale.
Thank you. Journalism sure is doing wonders for you!
essiej (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-21)
I will try to do this like Mama does.
ChrisB thank you for your comment. You make a lot of sence. She does help out a lot of people, sometimes I do not think she realizes that. It is just something she does. I must just feel left out cause she was the one who came here to help us, and now she is the one who sees to. Sounds like you know her to.
Thank you Jennifer for your comment.
Hi KimSouthO. WHen Job was learning patience back in the Bible times, everything was taken away from him. Even his family. I am scared that the same will happen here. She helps so many people, maybe she will think the ghosts are more important.
My favorite Mr FRAWIN. You know Mama. Do you think I need to worry about her? I know she came back out to us, and acts like this didn't happen. She doesn't even talk about it. I expected her to put the story on here, but she never did. Mama doesn't hide anything from us.
killingkilgore thank you.
killingkilgore (3 stories) (35 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
This one's going in the favorites. What a touching story. I loved it and thank you so much for sharing what seems like a very personal story.
FRAWIN (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
Hello Essie. We have a saying in my neck of the woods-"All in good time..."When the time is right she will share with you, if not then it's one of the things you'll have to learn to accept. Take it from someone that lives with someone that has the ability to "talk to the other side" -some things you just have to get use to. Don't take this the wrong way but sometimes a private conversation needs to be kept private, even if one of the participants is "living impaired".
Take care and God bless you.

KimSouthO (27 stories) (1960 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
I am so very sorry for the loss of your grand father. You have written such a touching and heart felt story here, it brought tears to my eyes. The love you feel for your mama, and for your whole family is admirable.

As far as who your mama is talking to or communicatting with, I would ask that you just be patient. Sometimes mamas need some secrets or some private matters just as others do. I am certain she is not keeping things from you to be hurtful or prideful, it is just her personal connection. She may choose to share it with you as you get older, she may not. Accept her for this as you have for all of her strengths.

Thank you so much for sharng this story with us!
God Bless!
Jennifer40 (20 stories) (202 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
I'm so sorry for your loss! 😢

Thank you for sharing your story with us.

Jennifer ❤
ChrisB (6 stories) (1515 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
Essiej that was a very touching story. It must have been hard for all of you to let your granpa cross over. I believe your mother is a very strong person. She has helped many people through here life. Even on this website. But everybody needs somebody. You and your family are the biggest excitement and love she could ever ask for. And knowing that she has a family that she can rely on makes life easier. But on that day I think there was nobody on this planet who could comfort her. Except her father. And that is why I think he came to her and said everything will be ok. Fathers love daughters and I bet she knew that. Your papa is somewhere up there watching all of you. And loves you all so very much. I hope to hear from you soon and take care
essiej (guest)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
I am sorry Papa is what we called my dad's dad. Thank you both for support, even tho I didn't explain that out.
rhodes68 (14 stories) (1596 posts)
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
Thanks for an incredibly moving story essiej! I'm so sorry about you dad's passing and about the sorrow it has brought to your family.

I'm honestly impressed by the description of your mother;rarely do you see parents allowing their kids the freedom to have their own experiences and lessons from them. It takes a lot of love and courage, at the same time, to give so much space to others.

I think your mum is very hurt and vulnerable at the moment and she will need all the love and help she can get from all of you to cope with this new situation but I also think that she is lucky to have such loving children around her to help and support her.

Give her the time she needs to grieve but make sure she also feels the love you have for her every single minute of the day.

Obviously that day she wasn't alone. Her beloved half was sitting next to her on the bed.

Tammy ❤
Martin (602 posts) mod
16 years ago (2008-03-20)
I thought that was an incredibly touching story essiej, very innocent, and I'm sorry about your father 😢 Must be hard. Thanks for sharing.

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