The Shadow Man That Haunted My Childhood

My name is Emilio Jimenez. I am an 18 year old and I'm in high school. I have always meant to tell this story but never got around to it. When I was younger (in elementary school) I was -- in other people's words -- evil. I can remember most of everything that I did as a child except for the "evil" things I did that got me into trouble, but what I do remember from those days are what happened to me.

When I was a kid I used to stay up late and watch TV like all kids would. The only difference is that when I was ever alone in a room I would see things. I always saw a dark human figure quickly run past my family room window and my sliding glass door. It was a full silhouette of black. This continued happening and on multiple occasions my family would check to see what or who it was. We would never find anything.

One night when I was watching TV (still all alone in the darkness) I looked to my right out of my family room window and I saw a man standing there. But he wasn't a normal man if a man at all. He was a black silhouette that was standing upside down outside of the window. It was as if he was standing on a non-existent ceiling outside my house. But that wasn't the worst part, the worst part was that he was staring at me. It felt as if he was staring into my being. We locked eyes for what seemed like forever before I flung the blanket I was wearing over my head. I don't remember how long I kept my blanket over my head but when I took it off the shadow man was gone.

I kept seeing the shadow man even after that event, all the while getting into trouble after trouble at school. But after a certain point I stopped seeing him. With the stoppage of sightings came the stoppage of my getting into trouble (at least as much trouble as I used to get into). Finally it seemed to be over.

After elementary school things seemed to be normal in a way. But around my late 8th grade year and the beginning of my high school life I felt like I was being watched whenever I stepped out of my house into the darkness. In the beginning of my high school life I could have two different opinions about things; such as, at one point I could love humanity and at another point I could absolutely hate it for no reason, nowadays it's a grey area for me.

It all seemed weird to me but I didn't give it all much thought then. When I got further into my high school life my ideas of things got worse; like if everyone around me died I would be better off. Things like that would go through my mind. Also at times I couldn't feel certain things, love, happiness, and other feelings depending on the day. I at one point got a love for knives and had the idea in my head of what the "right" knife would feel like. I honestly have no idea what it looks like but I know what it would have felt like in my hands.

Around my Sophomore and Junior years, I remember having a reoccurring dream. I remember it perfectly. I remember being in a cave, there was a red glow around me covering everything lightly. To my right were three pillars of metal and on the pillars (which didn't connect to the ceiling of the cave) were spikes, chains, and what looked like tortured people. I remember one man was chained near the top of one of the pillars and had a spike or two going through him; he was bleeding all over the place and was missing his lower legs and lower arms.

In my junior year there were major times when I couldn't feel anything at all. No emotion would come to me during certain periods of time, I could be in an argument with people I cared about and still would feel nothing. No love, no hate, no anger, no compassion, nothing.

Now when I go into the darkness I feel at peace, I feel calm. I used to feel like the shadow man was still deep inside of me sleeping, or stalking me through the night waiting for a day that I become weak so he may return. But nowadays I feel at peace with the world, I still hate most people but my feelings are starting to return, my love is coming back, I feel free from him. If he does return however, I will be ready for him.

Please tell me what you guys and girls think this thing was, and why it let me go. I know it was a dark entity and have sometimes called it a shadow demon but I honestly don't know what it is. Again, I would love to hear what you think this thing is, and why it let me go or if I got away somehow.