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Being Called A Liar


This is hard for me to even start because I was always told I was a liar when came to this subject. As far as I can remember it all started when I was five. I just started going to Victory Baptist Church with my neighbour Barbra. My Mom and Dad never truly believed in the same things I did when it came to going to church. Before I go any further I need to tell you a little bit about my family's background.

My Grandfather Ben was diagnosed with schizophrenia when he was 23. Mom was always told to look for signs of the illness when having children because it's genetic. When I started having my trouble around five I was avoided and told I was a liar and was sick like my Grandfather. I felt helpless and alone most of my childhood.

The first time I had an issue was when I was learning how to pray and I was saying my bedtime prayers before bed. I turned off my bedroom light and fell right to sleep and maybe within hour something woke me up. When I turned my head I saw a being in a black cloak standing right next to my bed with a knife raised up. I was so scared unable to scream or even move. I couldn't believe what I was seeing was even real.

As I was lying there in fear looking at it and it was looking back at me I felt numb. Then all of a sudden it stabbed me with the knife it didn't hurt but I felt it go threw me. I screamed as loud as I could for my Mom and Dad shaking and realized I wet the bed. My Mom rushed in turned on the lights and asked what happened? When I told her she had a weird look like whatever and said it was just a dream now go back to bed. Once she realized I wet my bed she yelled at me asking if I was trying to be a baby all over again. I was so scared crying and confused of what just happened. All I needed was to be told it would be all right but that never did that come out.

After my Mom changed my sheets and I was all dry I was sent back to bed with all lights off. I begged for the lights to be left on and I was told to stop being stupid. So I lay there for what seemed like hours just looking around and saw nothing else for the night. I didn't seem to have any problems for a couple of nights until I went back to church that Sunday.

That night I felt my bed shaking and It woke me up of course I screamed and my Mom once again comes running in and asked what now. I'm crying trying to tell her what happened but she was mad and wouldn't listen saying I needed to be put in the mental hospital like my Grandfather that I was sick and crazy. I felt bad about myself unable to understand what was going on but knew what I saw and felt. I still felt it shaking as my Mom was yelling at me it wasn't like the movie the Exorcist by any means I guess to describe it would be like a massage bed that vibrated but maybe not that strong all I know is it woke me up and I felt it. I asked her to sit on the bed and when she did she couldn't feel it. Then she checked under my bed and in my closet said Jesse enough is enough now get some sleep. Once again forced to sleep in the dark but now hearing my floors making weird noises. I just keep my eyes closed this time not caring, I just didn't want to see or hear anything else. I asked God to help me to make it all stop and go away but it never did.

I never slept at night and was unable to focus when I started school. I was different then everyone else I didn't belong. I was scared and wanted to tell someone about what was going on but was to scared they would think I was sick just like my Mom always told me I was. When I had bad nights I was always in trouble the next morning. I remember my Mom once told me I'm trying to mess up my Mom and Dad and I'm trying to tear them apart and she didn't stop there. I was a liar and the famous one was I was sick.

One night I had my best friend spend the night with me and I kind of told her about what has happened to me but didn't tell her everything because I didn't want her to look at me the same way my Mom did. That night she woke up scared I remember her saying she saw a net coming at her I never saw it myself but just new I felt safe with her there. I told her it was just a dream and she's okay. We went back to sleep the next day I told her everything because she now shares what I see. I wasn't crazy I felt so happy and when I told my mom that Amanda saw it also she blamed me for making her say that and I scared her and that's why... Once again I felt alone and scared.

Amanda came over a lot and was my shoulder through I hell I was put threw. My house though I must say was a big hit on Halloween my Mom let me have a big sleep over with all the girls from my classes and of course my best friend Amanda was there. She would tell about the things she saw and for once I felt okay to tell them what I truly saw because I was able to say its just ghost stories what's wrong with you.

One of my last sleep over parties on Halloween was when I was ten years old. Finally one of the girls said well let's see what happens when the lights go out so all us girls jumped on the bed and the one closest to the light had to turn the lights off and sure enough I saw the net coming towards all of us and everyone even myself was screaming. My Mom comes rushing and yelling what in the world are you girls doing at the same time flipping on the lights and all the girls were scared and told my Mom the same story that Amanda told her years back and said that they wanted to go home and half of them did. I think at that point my Mom started believing me... It wasn't until I was eighteen my Mom told me she saw stuff to but because of my Grandfather illness she was scared to ever say anything. Although I feel a little bit better on what had happened it still don't take away the shame and emptiness this has caused me.

My Mom is now a spiritualist and believes in energy and all this stuff I think is crazy. She tells me I'm blessed to be able to sometimes see the things I do. I feel its hell, a curse I felt helpless and alone never do I ever want to feel that again. She said I closed off my gift. No I protect myself because I know longer want to see or feel, even though I sometimes still do.

I have a son now of my own and I listen to him if he said he saw something I try ask as much as I can and try to help him understand whatever it is he sees. Of course after he tells me I wait until the next day when he is back in school and say as loud as I can that who ever is here keeping my son up at night that they are unwelcome and they need to leave my space.

I envision a white glow wrapped around my son and I guess that's how I always protected myself as a child through Jesus and his white glow. I didn't have time to go threw this and proof read my mistakes I have to go to work and unsure how to save this so I can fix it later. I guess I'll have to give it to you guys this way.

I'm sorry for the mistakes but thank you for your time. I just hope that maybe I helped someone else that feels alone like I did.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Jessalynn, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

sarah84 (2 stories) (18 posts)
10 years ago (2012-09-23)
wow. This is a really touching story. I feel for you enitrely. I can not even begin to understand what it must have been like for you. My mum always understood when I told her my stories. I remember, when I was about 8 I lived in a house on old WW11 grounds and that is where I saw my first spirit. I still remember his face vividly, I know not many people do remember the details but I do and I think about him alot. Anyways I tell my mum everything I see and she is always there to support me through it. I am glad that you are doing this with your son. Stay strong
Blessed be ❤
angelsunwell (3 posts)
10 years ago (2012-09-23)
When I read your story my heart cried for you, I grew up with many strange things and goings on but never made to feel like I was crazy, when I experienced anything supernatural I could talk to my mom, my dad, or my stepmom and they listened, God bless and keep you, you are so not crazy
scrapmetalkitten (306 posts)
13 years ago (2009-12-06)

I'm sorry you had to go through that. I can talk to my dad about the ghost stuff because he has had many experiences like me, but my mom says to stop talking about it because I sound like a crazy person. I understand how you feel even though my mom has experienced some weird things it is too taboo for her to talk about. I can tell it makes her really uncomfortable so I never bring it up with her. It hurts to not be believed but fortunately I could go to my dad and other family members and talk to them about my experiences and they would listen to me. I'm glad you had your friend to fall back on for support it makes all the difference in the world to have someone to talk to.

-Sydney ❤ 😊 ❤
jazzeyjay (3 stories) (215 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-21)
I just came across your story and want to thank you for sharing it with you. There are many people in hospitals and on medications because they have been misdiagnosed with this illness and others. Some of these people are truly seeing the things they say they are seeing and truly have a gift. It is so unfortunate that your mother wasn't there for you the way she should have been. I pray you have found peace now in the Lord. He is good all the time. The white light you see around your son is the white light of the Holy Spirit.

God bless you and your son.
vulcan10 (5 stories) (332 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-06)
schizophrenia is such a taboo that the mere mention of it will no doubt result for many in the same thing you experienced. It's terribly sad to have a parent doubt you and say things like that when your a child. I don't know that I could have survived emotionally in that type of environment. I hope that you have been seen by a proffesional in the field to determine the extent if any you are effected by schizophrenia or just the environment you were raised in. Both is sure to have long lasting effects. I'm sure your much more understanding to your child though, now, because of it. I don't understand the "net" thing though. I wonder if it was some type of projection you might have been putting out to others in dealing with the issues present in your life at the time?
L0VEPiNK07 (1 stories) (47 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-05)
what was the net? Like a fishing net or what? Did you continue to have experiences through high school and up until now? What about your friend amanda. I think it's great that you listen to your son, too, so he feels more safe and secure than you did. I think that's what being a parent is about.
ChildOfTheLotus (10 stories) (133 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-05)
Not trying to be rude at all, but your parents seem very insensitive. That is just plain mean and ignorant to tell a child that they are "being stupid" or "acting like a baby" when the child is obviously scared stiff.
I do not think that this is a case of schizophrenia. I have known a schizophrenic person, and your story, just in the details seems much different than that kind of encounter. I believe you really did have a real experience and you saw something that frightened you.
I'm glad you didn't follow in your parents' footsteps, and when your son sees something, you show compassion and talk to him about it. That's a wonderful thing and your boy is very lucky to have a parent that understands.
skywire (1 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-05)
I know you are not a lier. From that story a few things like that happened to me too. 😠
Tunka (15 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-04)
I think it was great that your mom finally believed you at that point when nearly ALL your friends saw it. But I guess that is why children see ghosts more than adults. I would probably say that the ghost was a... Well one of those Mobsters if you know what I mean. Well, I am sorry for your schizophrenia, I agree with renfestgirl, I think you didn't have it because others sae it. I come from Phillipines, and even I have ALOT of weird stories maybe even related to that! People even say that Vampires live in Phillipines, (Whatever) but I should submit some stories soon!

Tunka ❤
renfestgirl (7 posts)
13 years ago (2009-10-04)
I don't think you have any schizophrenia because other people saw it. I hope that you and your family are safe. 😁
zzsgranny (18 stories) (3327 posts) mod
13 years ago (2009-10-04)
I have often wondered how many sensitives have been diagnosed with schizophrenia...I understand that there are people who have serious mental problems, but do their problems stem from being misunderstood?...does anyone know if this has been researched?...I find it a fascinating subject as we have a friend whose son tried to commit suicide and failed...his mother died 4 or 5 years ago and he still talks to her...he had been diagnosed as schizophrenic prior to the failed for thought...

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