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32 Years Of Fear... Is It Me Or The Land Of The Home?


So let me start by just saying this... I have ALWAYS been afraid of the dark! As far back as I can remember being at my parents' house scared the heck out of me. To this day I can't walk through a room in their house... The house I grew up in... Without turning on a light. I feel like there is someone or thing watching me or even worse trying to harm me. It centres in certain places in the house too.

For starters, "Hi...I'm a 32 year old woman who just moved back home temporarily with my parents, as well as my little Cheweenie (Chihuahua/wiener) named Chloe. Now as a small child I dismissed all these, "occurrences" as just being afraid of the dark as my mother called it. But as I grew older little things got more noticeable. Such as at 14 screaming in terror in my bedroom because I swore that there were spirits in my room trying to attack me... So scared to the point that I curled up in a ball and cried. Okay so then two years later I had to call the police because I was getting silent prank calls which appeared to be coming from within the home. I know what you must be thinking... This girl grew up with one too many horror movies! I would probably be thinking the same thing. But it gets deeper. I almost forgot to tell you that when I was in third grade I recall waking up from a dream but still being in that foggy part and seeing a little girl... Her name was Rachael. She would usually be standing in the doorway trying to get me to follow her. I'd see her in the mornings.

After that years went by I was now living in a 3bedroom home in Pasadena, Ca... Very close to my parents' home. My friend parents owned the home but lived in Washington. She had told me about some events that had taken place there, but after I had moved in. To start, her brother would tell about the kitchen and how he'd clean up and then go to the bathroom and then walk back in and in and everything would be opened up and out of the cupboards. WIERD RIGHT? Then also while I was living there we had multiple friends that would sleep in the lanai'i room where there was an old rocking chair; that we were told that in the morning the thought they had seen an old woman sitting in the chair singing an old patriotic song. So we naively decided to get an old Ouija (not sure I spelled that right!) out and decided to ask who and how many inhabited the house. Little did we know that we were starting to play with fire by opening up a doorway that we weren't sure where it led to? When we asked how many were in the room it went from 4 to 83 within five minutes. We then started to get more and more curious and got more educated with Wicca. I found it very interesting. I seemed to be the magic key in the bunch. For I have always been able to make a wish and will it to happen. So when it came time to find out the name of the demon that haunted our roommate I was expected to do most of the research. Now when I say demon...I'll explain.

She had the room next to mine. After our dabbles of the board and reading more into our new spells and all... She had started having disturbances in the night. She described it as such," I was lying in bed with the lights dimmed and I saw this dark cloud over my bed! I heard this deep voice and then pressure on top of me..." the story went on more but you get the idea. About a week or so later was the incident involving the living room. A friend of mine had come over without calling, and came in through the kitchen so when me and my one roommate got home we were shocked! 2am and I had to try to get him to leave... Mind you no one had been there to start a fire in the living room and we came home to a smoke free house. All of a sudden when we came back inside of the house the living room was completely filled with dark black smoke. So that's when I did the reading on the characteristics on the occurrences and that's when I found the name of what it was.

There was one more event that was truly horrifying for me. However quite informative for myself personally and possibly an explanation to what has been following me my entire life and possibly still haunting me every time I am back at my parents' home.

One morning as I slept in my bed I was woken up to what I thought was my quite tiny, thin 20something year old roommate. The girl appeared to be in my room standing by my dresser. I looked at her and was surprised that she was in my room and had been watching me sleep and then had the nerve to wake me up. I asked her what she was doing in my room, " Kristy what are you doing?" She responded with an odd response, "I have a sister" (Which was completely odd because she didn't have a sister. She had only one brother) then she started to slowly come closer to my bed from across the room. I asked her, " Kristy what are you talking about?" She came back with, "I'm not Kristy!" So now I had my eyes in focus and was scared to death! I was actually that person that you read about that is about to get attacked from an angry ghost. The entity was almost to my bed and her anger in her voice had risen. She was now saying," You watch us... You see us". Years ago I had a theory that I was seeing the ghost of a young girl that had lived there with her sister and was possibly molested or murdered. I dropped my investigation and then decided best to move. But the tone in her voice I'll never forget.

Now on to San Jose was happily free from any of my afraid of the dark issues with ghosts and demons now starting with a new apartment and new roommates. I felt fine with waking up frequently at 3am almost every night. And yes I read a few opinions on the 3am thing. My former bible study teacher gave me the information that it is Satan's perverse joke on the Holy Trinity. That Jesus was to be believed to have died at 3pm and that the demons use that as a time for play a time to feed on the weak of faith.

So it started off that I could easily sleep with the lights off now, and go into the kitchen for water without turning on the lights. Then it got bad to the point where I had to have a light on every night to sleep. I also had to sleep with very soft music or noise. Otherwise I would hear and feel things. In the dark for as long as I can remember trying to go to sleep in the dark turned into a paralyzing fear which I am currently still faced with.

One night over the summer my roommate told me how she had not been sleeping well. She was 4months pregnant too. She told me that the night before she woke up in the middle of the night and thought she saw what she claimed to be as the devil with these 2 red fiery eyes staring at her and then it told her something in Spanish. Wellbeing the catholic that she is she saw that as a warning and took it as a meaning to clean and organize the room. She told me of the whole thing... Cleanliness is the way of God. Chaos brings in the devil. My other roommate Eric heard us talking and said," Wait don't start up with this...don't try to scare me..." I asked him why and what was going on with him. He had then told me about for months he would always wake up in the middle of the night and swore that he could smell smoke. I asked him about what time each night. He told me every night 3am. I then asked him to stop messing with me if he was joking! I sat that day and prayed with roommates. About a month later while I was in bed trying to go to sleep around 12am I woke up and the light was out. The bulb had died. I was a little panicked and rationalized that I was ok... But I think whatever had been surrounding me had fed off my fear and grew stronger. My little dog started to bark a couple of times into the air at what I thought was nothing. At that point I swore that I had seen a dark shadow or something up by the closet and the ceiling which I could feel watching me. I screamed so loud for help... But couldn't move, but somehow found a way to run to their room in tears from fear. I sat with them for a while with my dog and we all prayed in every language we knew. They found me a light bulb and I went to sleep. Now the only other things I can say for that apartment are the usual. Could not be alone in the bathroom with the lights off... I am convinced that there is some sort of entity that will try to pull and get me, even if I'm walking out of the bathroom. I can feel something right there, but I can't see it.

So now back to where it all stems from... My parents' home... The one I grew up in. I can say this... I know for a fact that the plot of land our home is on is formerly part of the Gainsborough estate. My land specifically was the carriage house and the place where the caretaker lived as well as the horse and carriages. The wall out front is the original stone and goes down half of the block. The trees out front are well over 100 years old. Prior to that I know it was all orange groves.

Now about 10years ago I had a rabbit that died. I buried it in the back yard. Sometime after that I woke up in the middle of the night I looked to the left and saw smoke in the room and then a light. I then saw a man from a long time ago. He looked like an old Spanish farmer. White dress shirt, tan vest, dark hair and a thick moustache that curled at the ends, and corduroy tan pants. He looked like he had fresh dirt on him as well. In his arms he was holding my rabbit as if he was showing me. He didn't speak to me and I was not frightened. I was sort or telepathically communicating with him. He wanted me to know that he and the others were now going to take care of the rabbit; that the rabbit was now with them.

The next morning I told my mother and she dismissed the idea of the ghost that I had seen. So I have a feeling that there was some sort of death that occurred here... Probably many spirits live here. And hopefully that explains a lot. As for feeling like I'm being watched by something here at the house it's more like I feel like something has been "hunting" me for over 20 years. The funny thing is that it's only here where I have that crippling fear of being outside in the dark. Anywhere else and I'm fine with being outside in the dark. I asked a friend to help me with figuring it out a couple of years ago. He walked back to the orchard, which is where a lot of the energy comes from, and when he came back he told me he could feel it too! He told me he sensed that it was the spirit of a small boy one that had been playing with me. Only he had been playing on my fear and that I was making him stronger. He said that I needed to increase my faith with God. I pray every day and I feel that I have a strong faith... But that honestly scares the crap out of me. What does this thing want? And if I'm supposed to help it how do I? Then there's the other side of the yard... Close to my parents' bedroom... That side is much darker in a spiritual sense. I get the feeling that it is an entirely different kind of entity. My dog barks at random things in the middle of the night; sometimes her hair goes up in fear when she's looking at the places that frighten me.

So readers if there are any of you in fact reading this... Please help! I've tried every type of prayer and commanding of them to all leave me alone. But I think its due time that I not be haunted like this anymore. Or if I'm some sort of psychic that spirits can reach to because I have a better sense of spirituality then please help me to not live in fear anymore.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, amy4ta, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

ParanormalGhostThingy2000 (3 posts)
10 years ago (2013-12-22)
Look up on google how to get rid of unwelcome spirits. I tryed it before and it worked you need a bible and olive oil. You need to put the olive oil on every door to a high activity room. I forgot what part of the bible you need to read. Look it up on google. If that doesn't work then your just seeing things
MizMiMi02 (guest)
12 years ago (2012-09-23)
So it's ok if you come to an old story, and be the grammar police while making no sense of your own? You cared enough to pick apart an old thread, so don't be a hypocrite. Good grief where's the troll repellant.
jitters (guest)
12 years ago (2012-09-22)
Mizmimi Don't let your mind wonder on your own. Be very collective and ill get back to you in no time BTW who cares
MizMiMi02 (guest)
12 years ago (2012-09-21)
Well Jitters, that makes 2 of us, because I had to read your comment twice. I understood the story just fine, as did many others apparently. Pot, meet kettle. BTW, this story is 10 months old, way to troll. Take it easy.
jitters (guest)
12 years ago (2012-09-21)
wait for another 32years, come back and tell your tale. To be honest I stopped on the half way and had to say this, I didn't understood a bit of you
AwesomeGal47 (1 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-23)
I suggest trying to spray holy water around your room and pray with all your might that He will watch over you and you confess you are a sinner. I know your know but someone does something wrong at least one time. If you confess, He will save you. I hope this helps.:)
taz890 (12 stories) (1380 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-23)
ahh 3 am again! Sorry to pick up on this one single thing in your story but I can find no refference to 3am/demon acctivity/bible anywhere!
Even online forums for the religious minded (im not) has questions about 3am and these people read the bible!
I am not in anyway bashing the bible, anyone with a religious background/upbringing or whatever, just saying if people that have and do read the bible have to ask where it is in there about 3am then maybe just maybe its not exactly true!
geetha50 (15 stories) (986 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-23)
Like isis80 said, this is story is all over the place but I got the jest of the story. My suggestion would be to continue praying and mediating. Envision a white around you and spread to every corner of the house.

You mentioned that your parents did not believe you when you were younger. What about now? Have you talked to them about what has been happening in your life? Have they experienced anything that they did not tell you because they knew that you would be to scared?
Moongrim (2 stories) (871 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-22)
Rough Guess- I'd say you're a Psychic Attention Sampler.

Oftentimes the best way to make something go away is to try ignoring it.

Such works with the Ravenous Bug Blatter Beast of Traal.
LouSlips (10 stories) (979 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-22)
Is Gainsborough estates now Gainsborough Drive, because I could not find anything related to it in Pasadena?

To be honest, and I hope you take this as a positive; I don't sense a lifelong haunting here. You may have experienced some sporadic paranormal events, and may have some sensitivity to spirits. But if you eliminate the connecting threads of your childhood fear of the dark, which would naturally be revisited in adulthood at your childhood home. Take away the multiple instances of what appears to be sleep paralysis. Take away the vivid dreaming occurrences. What was once considered a haunted existance could very well be broken down to just the events of seeing shadows and unknown dark forms, which in and of themselves could indeed be paranormal, but not the tormented life portrayed.

I'm not trying to discredit you, I just do not see 32 years of haunting in this story.

isis80 (3 stories) (51 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-22)
This story was all over the place and difficult to follow, but I think I understood as much as possible but you didn't finish anything before jumping on to the next thing and got me so confused and then you went back and forth in time as well.
DeviousAngel (11 stories) (1910 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-22)
Still gathering my thoughts at this point... I think I will wait for others to officially comment, because there are a few things wrong with this in my opinion, but I want to see if others have different perspectives before I go that route.
jeffosirius (1 stories) (7 posts)
13 years ago (2011-11-22)
I know this sounds bad but I enjoyed your story, probably because of the light in every room thing, I do that turning on lights like a ritual because of dreaded feelings I get in my house.
I only sleep in daylight now, I do believe there is stages that take place in haunted houses, like first the spirit picks you maybe because your open minded, then you see minor events contained mist, orbs and objects moving, then the fear increases images become clearer become vivid, then regular happenings occur.
Eg. Seeing the dark shadows getting stronger and more aggressive towards you,
Then the spirits get vocal, a 15 year old girl who threw herself in front of a train at the end of my back garden moved around me in my kitchen and whispered one word to me "heya" which terrified me because it was so clear, then well then I was attacked
Read Golden Rain my story on this website.
So I don't know if I can help you but just say be strong and create positive energy fields around yourself.
And maybe the old trees you mentioned in your story need holy water to cleanse the bad energy's surrounding them.
Take care

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