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Deal With The Devil


As a child I didn't really ever have experiences with anything paranormal... That is until I was 12 years old. I totally brought this upon myself and I have been living with the consequences ever since.

I grew up in a relatively devout catholic family and always believed in God. I never had tried to dabble in anything like this previously: quite the contrary, I always knew better than to mess with anything occult. Why I did what I did that morning I will never know, except to say that I was a young child that had a momentary lapse in judgment. Ok, so here is the story...

When I was twelve my parents decided to take a week long trip to Spain and I was left to stay with my grandfather who lived way out in the country on a 1500 acre farm. Not that I think that this had anything to do with what happened, but the house was very old and creepy to me as a child. One morning I woke up very early before the sun had come up. In the room I was staying in there where blackout shades so even during the day the room stayed almost completely dark when the shade was drawn. As I was laying there awake I started thinking about this episode of the twilight zone I had seen where a terminally ill man is confronted by the devil and trades his soul for a thousand years of life and he couldn't die, etc... Well my 12 year old self started thinking, there is a lot of cool things that I wanted and maybe I could just try and see what would happen if I attempted such an endeavor. I really didn't know how to go about it, so I just sat up in bed and started talking aloud. I said "I will trade you this and that (whatever my 12 year old self wanted at the time) in exchange for my soul". Well, I sat there and nothing happened. I waited, waited... Nothing. Well that settles that I thought, feeling pretty stupid. So I lay back down and started to dose off. I was at the point right before you fall asleep (ironically, I later learned, called the twilight zone) when I felt something grab the back of my neck, hard. I bolted up, startled, and looked around. Nothing. Well, I thought, maybe I had actually made it to sleep and just dreamed it. This didn't really frighten me too much and I lay back down. This time I fell asleep.

I don't know how long I was asleep but I don't think it was too long. All I know is that I was asleep and then BAM I was instantly wide awake. Standing over me was a giant shadow being (I assume it was a shadow, just remember that it was almost pitch black in the room) and there was some force holding me to the bed. I was unable to move or scream during this whole experience which I think lasted about 15 seconds. Since I couldn't do anything else, I closed my eyes in terror. This is when the moan/scream happened. I heard this not with my ears, but it was in my head. It started as a long, low moan and transitioned itself into this blood curtling scream. Words do not do this noise justice -- it was so far from anything human. I can only imagine it is what can be heard in hell. By this point I was so scared that I think the only reason I didn't have a heart attack was that I had a healthy 12 year old heart. Finally I was able to mouth out the word "stop" and as soon as I did, everything ceased. I was trembling so hard that I thought for a second that something was actually shaking the bed. I have never prayed so hard or with so much conviction in my life. I stayed where I was probably for a full 5 minutes praying simply because I was too scared to get out of bed to get to the door. Finally I summed up the courage and basically smacked through the door. While this was the worst of my experiences, it certainly was not the only one.

For years to this day, I would be visited by this force that would come and hold me to my bed, unable to move or scream. It seemed to happen less frequently as the years went by, and rarely happens anymore which brings me to another point that I would like to touch on.

In reading some other stories on here people talk about the sleep paralysis, and some of the responses people give is that it is a matter of simple sleep paralysis. I know for a fact that what happens to me is no natural occurrence because it would happen quite often while I was awake. I could feel the presence of something on certain nights and know that it was going to happen. I would lie there in the dark, scared and alone and wait. It would always start as a tingle that started at the base of my spine and work its way up. When it reached my neck and head I would instantly be held to the bed. I learned after a while that I could tense up when I felt the sensation start and I could hold it down to the base of my spine, but inevitably I couldn't do it all night and out of exhaustion I would give in. Although I never saw the shadow figure again, I would from time to time experience EXTREMELY loud buzzing sounds or intense instant feelings of extreme panic. I would have nightmares that were like no other dreams that I had ever had... They were so vivid and real, and entirely evil. I know in my heart that they were associated with the terror that I brought upon myself. Needless to say, I was fairly traumatized by this throughout my teenage years.

Something that has always made me wonder since this happened is why didn't God protect me from these repeated attacks. Certainly these experiences had brought me closer to God - I prayed to him constantly at night for protection (among other things of course) and it never seemed to do any good. I would call into the darkness, rebuking it in the name of Jesus to no avail. Some might say that I am forever damned for what I did, and that the reason I was beyond protection was that I placed myself entirely in Satan's power. But I do not believe this. Am I to be forever held accountable for the sin that I committed as a child? No, God's power and forgiveness saves all and nothing is above that. I have made my peace with what I have done and lived with the consequences. Hopefully my torment has been my penance.

I would love to hear about any questions or comments on this because I get so little constructive feedback. I hope my story helps people believe that there is a battle between good and evil out there and it helps people believe.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, C-lancy, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

H2olily (5 stories) (157 posts)
10 years ago (2012-12-15)
You gave evil entities the legal right to disturb you and you have to rescind and revoke that right. They are like evil lawyers who can lie and don't have to hold their end up.
Kiika-88 (1 posts)
10 years ago (2012-03-13)
This happened to me.
In Mexico they say "El muerto se Te subio"
Which means the dead tried to take over your body.

I find it weird how every detail about not being able to speak... And it would happen while you where awake, the same thing would happen to me. Except my mother taught me to say gods name out loud and the spirit would leave you alone.
Kryodrache (3 stories) (108 posts)
10 years ago (2012-01-28)
D: Really? That's a huge shame:C I keep seeing comments from Whitebuffalo around here (I'm basically just leafing through entries old and new) and it didn't occur to me to look at the date. What a downer!
Javelina (4 stories) (3749 posts)
10 years ago (2012-01-28)
This was two years ago.
Whitebuffalo left a year ago.

Kryodrache (3 stories) (108 posts)
10 years ago (2012-01-28)
Whitebuffalo... You've really given me something to think about. I was only half-paying attention as I was looking through the comments, listening to music, and then I read your first comment... And just stopped. I do think you rather just gave me a revelation. I have much to ponder about, I believe...
C-lancy (1 stories) (1 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-25)
thanks so much for all your comments... It is reassuring to hear what I have mostly been thinking anyways. I do believe that I have been in the process of spirtually healing cause, like I said, it doesn't happen very much anymore and I have done my fair share of repenting. And eyes wide open -- it is good to hear that someone else had seen that episode of the twilight zone, no one else I have told that knew what I was talking about.
sorry it took me a few days to get back on here, but thanks everybody and I will check again soon and maybe share some more stories of crazy things I have seen in my life. PEACE
Jitow (362 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-25)
You are correct. There is nothing that we can do that God will not forgive us of. Once He forgives us, it is gone and He forgets it. The problem is that the world does not forget and yes we have to pay the earthly consequnces of our sin. We are saved, forgiven, but still must suffer the backlash from our sin and normally that backlash is as severe as the sin that we committ. As long as you keep God at the top of the list and you live a daily walk with Jesus Christ, those burdens and that backlash will fade. It is difficult to follow Christ, no one ever said that it would be easy and many times the more we live for Him the more we are tempted. Just remember the words from the Bible, there is nothing that you are going through in this world, right now, that another brother and sister somewhere in the world are going through at the same time, He will not let the temptation be more than you can handle and He will always make a way for your escape from it. The Bible has all the information that anyone would ever need to live a full and happy life-knowing that eternity is taken care of and that your soul will never die-absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. Once you know this, nothing in this world can take it from you.
aussiedaz (18 stories) (1523 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-24)
Hello c-lancy,I know there is a lot of excellent advice already given, so I try and get to the point, I had a similar experience a long time ago I know how frightening it can be. Praying to the lord will help of coarse and I will pray for you, but you must not show him any fear easy said I know, but I promise you it will work.
God bless
ZiShu (281 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-24)
It is true that what you did became a consequences. However God is still with you because you are still alive.
I'll go straight into it. It is not sleep paralysis to those whom say it is. I experience the same things you had. The shadow being is some type of demon. It is a shadow because it cannot manifest enough energy to take it's true form. It holds you down and attack you to feed from your negative energy. What it tries to do is break your will so that you would allow it to give in so eventually it could possess you. You should have your priest help exorcise this demon from you. Take a crucifix and pray to it day and nightly so that the Holy Spirit will fill it up.
Pray for Christ to be at your side. Pray for your Guardian Angel to protect you. Pray for St. Michael to come fight off this demon, because he will.
You need divine intervention for this battle. Do not worry, you are not alone. I will speak with certain "sources" for you to see this demon's attachment problem and ask for other solutions.
God Bless
EyesWideOpen (63 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)

Tell us about yourself. I'd like to know. I think most of these replies are sincere efforts to persuade C-lancy in his struggle that things aren't as bad as they seem. And he isn't helpless.

What the hell are you doing? 😠

My apologies to the administrators.
EyesWideOpen (63 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
C-lancy, (please be patient, I'm sorry it's so long)

I may say things that you know too well already. Sorry. There will also be others that do the exact same thing.

Children truly can be impressionable, especially when it comes to TV. I'll give you an example. My older brother and my younger brother and I were each given a gift, I don't recall from who. We each received a yellow (plastic) cowboy rope. My older brother apparently saw a man being "hung" on some old black and white television program.

Now I had seen cowboys doing rope tricks, and that is what I was concentrating on at the moment. I'm not sure what my younger brother was doing, or even if he had enough imagination to know what to do with a rope.

My older brother decided (for reasons unknown) to hang himself. I'm not sure but I think he had his hands around the noose, which prevented him from being choked to death. Anyway, the adults finally noticed what was going on, and they got him down safely. He was out on a limb, and up pretty high. Someone climbed the tree, cut the rope and he dropped about 10 feet, and was caught by my uncle. Quite a drop, and some small miracle that I am able to recall it.

How is that for the argument that TV and Movies can influence the behaviour of children. Ha! What about video games?

The particular episode of Twilight Zone that you mentioned, I am familiar with. The Devil agreed to giving this man eternal life, and nothing could kill him. The irony was, after testing his indestructable body several times, he was no longer amused.

So he committed a crime. He was arrested and sent to jail, where he subsequently went to court for trial. It turns out that he didn't receive the death penalty, which is what he wanted (because he knew they couldn't kill him), rather he was given "life in prison with no possibility of parole." So, his gift did have strings attached. He would live in prison forever. Moral of the story? Don't deal with the Devil. You just can't win.

I'm sure that God was and is fully aware of your actions as a child. He is still here with us. The good new is, He is merciful.

My older brother decided to test "hanging" himself, and you tried to trade with the Devil. When Jesus died on the cross, he didn't just die for the people then, it was also for us, and our children, and so on..., and for some that were already dead for that matter, and I suspect maybe some of these people were already in Hell.

And now I have to confess something to you!
I was about 16, and arbitrarily decided to test the Devil. I wanted to know if he was really after me. I don't want to get into the details..., it wouldn't help you anyway.

What I discovered was the he was definitely out to get me. I don't need any more tests to answer that question again. I already know.

In closing, I'd like to be yet another person to deliver the message that Jesus purchased your salvation with His death and ressurection. No deals with the Devil are binding. Jesus' purchase was for some already dead, and much much more so for all the generations to follow.

It isn't good to be irresponsible with your words. The Bible tells us that our words have the ability to bring "things" into being, and if I'm correct, our words can administer life and death.

Satan is the Father of Lies. You can't make any deals with him. Prayer to our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ will bring us into His Kingdom. Satan has no authority there.

Ulimately, it may be you that has to get you out of this "trade" you made. God tells us we are to put on the Whole Armor of God so that we may withstand the "wiles" of the Devil, whatever that may be. Resist the Devil and he will flee! The Bible says so!

I'm 53, and while I suffered a couple of episodes in my teens, I had a sleep paralysis episode again very recently. I'm grown up, and I'm not so easily scared. I know my enemy. I know the Word, and I know God. Don't hesitate to call on the Holy Spirit.
JEJ1984 (4 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
Maybe we have heard the same sounds? The one I heard was scary, but felt it wasn't indeed hell. Maybe OUR limbo is shared by many beings throughout the universe when they die also, after what I heard that's all I can say. Maybe the underworld or limbo, some kind of "meeting spot," hahaha the train station right. Trains run late sometimes like everything does time to time, and by the sound of it no train has been there to pick anyone up in a while. Very congested, a lot of confusion and chaos. Maybe we pull our musical inspiration from this chaos and put order to it I don't know, just had a while to put thought into what I heard AND SAW. No there's not a real train, just try to understand. Let me tell the noise first.

I heard it myself listening to music oneday.
My friends and I were listening to 369 mafia albums (lol no kidding) and one song came on and my friends said I fell into some kind of trance, and I jumped up yelling after they been trying to get my attention for the last longest they tell me when I'm "back to reality."
It was like whispering, singing and yelling, but all at once. I can't really describe it myself, like unknown noises, all mixed in together. And there was this roaring whoosh noise that reminded me of what you hear inside a seashell, the ocean noise I guess. The noise made me think maybe a sound keeps everything together? I don't know what I thought that then at that second.
What I saw really did scare me, was like a glimpse I was there, but 100s of people (?) around, pulling themselves out of these black cliff things and, I just hope we really don't have to go there at some point.
I was surrounded by this weird "region."
I just really hope my mind was putting a place to look at in my trance to match along the noise by previous artwork I mighta looked at, like maybe I didn't really see anything I HOPE and my imagination played along with that noise. But I know the noise I picked up on was very very real.
I still can hear it when I think about it time to time, but since I haven't had any nightmares, just weird dreams lol Don't worry I have more psychic experiences that has dumbfounded people more than crazy ones. Not to say I'm not crazy a little bit. After everything I been through, you have to be Jesus or someone like it to not have gone a little bonkers. And that noise, more than enough to drive someone to insanity. Maybe that noise is what keeps us from communicating so easily with these energies I thought too, maybe they have it as hard as us on hearing from there.
Had a terrible headache since reading your story, hope I typed this all out in some eligible format for you to understand, a lot to say lol just I know if something came to you that easy, you probably have some capability you can excercise more so than others. Best thing is to just keep the channels off, sometimes ignorance can be bliss. Express proper communication, apparently it will listen to you. Personally if I was the shadow, I wouldn't stopped making me go all the way down there to have to see you bc you felt like getting mouthy one night. But you shouldnt pay for it the rest of your life, you were 12 anyways lol
JEJ1984 (4 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
doesn't seem you called out to anyone in particular in the beginning there. Sounds like a forced meditation. Look into kundalini.
And just do it yourself
whitebuffalo (guest)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
I have not read any of the other comments, and I am going to warn you. You are about to be talked to as I would talk to one of my own. So prepare yourself. 😊

You know, when we are kids, we do some pretty stupid things. We do them because we do not have the second thought about being invincible. We just "know" that we are.
We think we can fly, so we climb up on the roof of our garage and jump, hoping to flap our arms and be able to soar with the eagles, only to find ourselves bouncing off the picnic table that is next to the garage. We imagine ourselves to be the worlds greatest stunt driver, so we hop on our bikes and try to jump through a train car that has both sides open, only to find out that "splat" is not only a word, but a sound. We make comments (in jest, or in the sincerity of the time) that are wrong, hurtful, rude or sacrilegious.
We do things as kids that if we look at the results, we can learn from.

You floor me.
You say that God did not protect you from these attacks.
If I may...
If He did not (protect you, I mean), do you honestly think you would still be alive to this day? If God really stepped back and thought something along the lines of "Sorry, Kiddo, you screwed up. Look somewhere else for help", do you think that you would have the personal relationship with Him that you do?
You were raised Catholic.
What is the age of accountability?
Do you really think that the Good Lord would hold you to something that you did BEFORE that age was reached? You were not, and are STILL not, held accountable to something you may or may NOT have done within that time frame.
Stop beating yourself up.
I have said it before, and I will say it again: Our God is a God of second chances. And third chances. And fourth chances. If this was not the case, do you THINK He would command us to forgive seventy times seven? How could a God that expects us to do so, not do so Himself?
Maybe what I learned through Catechism is a mite different than what it is that you did, but I learned that we screw up, we ask forgiveness and it is granted. Do not get me wrong. That does NOT mean that we can do whatever we want all through the week and then fall on bended knee on Saturday night in the confessional.
But what that means, TO ME, is that God accepts that I am human and subject to mistakes. He forgives my short comings and gives me another rung on that ladder to HELP me help myself up while serving Him. While He is constructing that next rung, He is also lovingly bracing me against the ladder so that I do not fall. He GAVE us free will in which to learn.
What did you learn?
You now have a strengthened relationship with your Lord. WITH that strengthened relationship (whether you spoke those words at twelve or not, it really would not matter) you WILL encounter the Spiritual War. You WILL be persecuted for His name sake. You WILL be tested, you WILL be tempted.
Good Heavens, even Jesus Christ Himself was. And I ain't talking He was tempted to do something a little off, He was tempted to BOW to evil.
It is my own personal take, that the evil one remembers you (that is just his way. He is that way for EVERYONE, it is NOT truly personal) and in his remembrance of what happened, he just hopes that you will think just as you did way back then. Sure, it WOULD be neat to get all kinds of riches, and power and such. But you and I both know that comes with a heavy, heavy price. He is GOING to tempt you, and send others to do so as well. THAT, my friend, IS the Spiritual War, and YOU are but a soldier IN it.
Keep praying. Keep reading. Keep in YOUR faith. It is a battle. But it is one that we KNOW who will rise up as victor.
Thank you.

I know, Peanut Gallery, not quite my normal comment, but hey...
PsychicKid11 (1 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
God didn't protect, because you asked the devil to take your soul... If the devil just took your soul and you didn't want him too, then god would probably help you. Don't ever do that again! That is very dangerous...:|
totalyodel (3 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-23)
Wow. I really can't imagine how scary that must be. It did sound at first like sleep paralysis but since it comes up when you're awake, I think it may be more similar to a panic disorder. I have suffered from all sorts of things that I was sure were paranormal or that I had in some way brought upon myself. As I started doing research on anxiety and panic disorders, everything that was happening to me started to make sense. The question was always "how do I deal with this?". I had someone recommend a book to me that completely changed my life. The book is called "Emmanuell's Book II: The Choice for Love". I know it may sound a little cheesy but the insight in it is absolutely priceless. Whether or not this is something paranormal or involving a deal with the devil, this book will help you. It deals mostly with the differences between fear and love and how you have control over them. If you did make a deal with the devil, he is going to be playing off of your fears in order to maintain control of you. You need to take back your will power and say "no!" to fear. This book and the advice from the person who recommended it have helped me so much, and I hope you will find this book and read it, and I pray it will be just as helpful to you. Take care.
Moongrim (2 stories) (871 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-22)
Thanks for the sermon. I'll be sure to add it to my collection along with the others.
fatthead (1 stories) (55 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-22)
You were just a kid even though you had to know that was wrong and I think if your sorry god will forgive you so I think you can let yourself off the hook. So that shadow thing stayed with you to this day I would of had a nervous break down or went nuts stay strong and I hope it goes away. I will say prayer for you my friend
Pjod (3 stories) (978 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-22)
you are a spirit in a human body. No possible way for you, as a 12 year old boy, to change that. After you shed your human form, you will go back home, wiser for the experience of living a life on earth. Stop wasting so much energy, worried about being damned. No such thing. Do what you have to, and stop this haunting you experience every now and then. The more you try to find spirituality, the more answers will come to you on how to deal with this. First thing you must do, is stop believing something you said and did when you were 12 may haunt you for eternity. Nonsense.
Good luck with your search.
Wardo (8 stories) (171 posts)
12 years ago (2010-01-22)
I'm not sure where to start on this one, because it does seem as though a demon of sorts was playing tricks on you. I believe that you are correct about NOT being eternally damned for this act, although you did attempt to invoke the devil to give you your earthly desires. However, I believe that you were not in full control of your soul at the time, and therefore you could not give it away. Also, have you been baptized? This is the beginning of promising your soul to Jesus Christ, and though it is usually done at such a young age, it is always accepted as your first true act to God's side.

So in other words, don't worry too much about the safety of your soul, as you said you've prayed and have accepted God and rejected Satan throughout your life from that point on. This could have been an important event in your life, even though traumatic. I still believe that everything occurrence has its purpose.

Why did God let it happen to you? God gave us free will and will never tell us what to do with it. Even as a small child, you tempted the devil with the thought of getting your young soul nearly for free. God will not stop earthly events, as he let his only true son suffer on the cross for our sins. Jesus died for you and all so that sins may be forgiven. Don't worry, if you truly want forgiveness, and have some attrition for what you did, then you are already safe from the devil's grip.

One thing is certain about your experiences though, they do relate very closely with people's "sleep paralysis" occurrences. Who knows, maybe there really isn't any "science" at all behind these events. Maybe they always are purely paranormal. Although I believe that you did sort of invite this type of thing into your reality, I do not believe it to have any real hold over you or your eternal soul.

I would do some reading from the book of Psalms in the Bible first if I were you. It can provide clarity and get you some spiritual protection back on your side if these terrifying events are still occurring. I think what I heard from some users is Psalms 91 and 71? I'm sorry, but though I am Catholic, I do not have too much familiarity with the Bible. Kind of sad really as I would like to read through it one day. I do know that these are some very powerful readings though, and they have been used by priests to perform exorcisms and stop all kinds of demonic activity. Also, if you prefer, or in addition to this, you can get some sage and a few amethyst crystals to keep around. Display images of Jesus' triumph over evil and get yourself a blessed crucifix if you do not have one. Don't put it in a drawer, wear it to bed if you are able to. Or at least keep it somewhere where it can be seen by you and all who look towards it. Say a prayer in Jesus' name whenever you can or when you feel frightened. The Our Father and Hail Mary go great together and you can say them over and over again, increasing their power over your life.

One more thing you can try, though it is out of my faith to do, but I've heard it works.

You need pure salt and pure water. Pour the salt into a V shape on the floor, making sure that it is a solid line. Step into the open V and close it off with salt making a triangle that you are now standing in. Use all the salt you need in order to make a thick, solid line. Say a prayer and ask for Jesus and the Lord, all angels and saints and good spirits to be with you and ask Mother Mary to pray for you. She does anyway. Once you are completely satisfied that you have said your prayers and asked for the help you need, step out of the salt triangle trapping whatever your problems were inside. Next, wash the salt away with pure water, then you can clean it up. Say something to the effect that you are washing away the sins that have been committed and then see what happens. I'm not really recommending this procedure, but it is an alternative if you do not practice a faith.

On the other hand, what would work better is to go to confession about this. Ask the priest to bless you and keep you moving towards Jesus and away from the devil. Now leave Satan behind because nothing good can ever come with a run in from him. You will see better days my friend, just continue to pray and ask for forgiveness from the Lord. In a way, God gave us the power to confess our sins to one another and be saved in Jesus' name. In a way, you have already done this, but a priest would seal the deal. Make sure that you have thought about it long and hard before you go to confess, and that you feel some real sorrow for the sins that you want to be forgiven.

I hope this helps my friend and God bless you! I will say a prayer for you as well, and I know that Jesus still wants you! He is the one that will stop short of nothing to get your soul, not the devil! In the name of God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, you will be safe, blessed, and loved forever. Hang tight friend and keep us up to date! I sure hope you will find something helpful!

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