The Victorian Doll

When I was a young girl my great Uncle had come into town to spend the week of the 4th of July with us. He loved to go to vendor markets when he came to visit seeing that he lived in the city and we live in the country side we have plenty around.

So his second day visiting my mom took us all to one of the nicer ones in Murphy, NC, which was my favorite one. I loved seeing all the old wagon wheels and going by the candle shop watching the older woman carefully dip the wicks in the colorful wax though my favorite stop was the wood carver. He would make beautiful statues out of cherry wood and big tree stumps. One of my favorite ones was a carving of an owl. I always loved the smell of his shop.

After my uncle had gone through and found two antique saws to hang in his workshop and a nice handmade dream catcher for my Aunt, it was time for lunch. We had stopped at a small cafe in the market to grab a burger and my mom noticed a new shop that had been added in right across from it so we decided to go look a little more after everyone had finished up.

As we walked in the opening (most of the shops didn't have doors) there was a huge wall of wind chimes a few stones and crystals for sale which I thought was funny because who would want to buy a rock, you can go down to a creek side and get all the rocks you wanted for free. (I was 7, so I didn't understand then) incense, books but one thing caught my attention more than anything was a small table with different dolls.

There were all kinds of them, some looked like fairies and some like old fashioned ladies, as I called them, but one stood out among the rest. She had brown curly hair with brown eyes, pale white skin, wine colored lips and a beautiful dark red dress with a gold flower pattern on the front, though I found it weird that she was still in her box.

I ran up to my mom and all but drug her to the doll and asked her why nobody would want to take such a pretty doll out of a box and that she looked sad in there. To which she said, "Its a porcelain doll and can break so the box kept her safe and she wasn't meant to be played with." So I asked her why she looked so sad in there and she told me dolls don't have emotions like we do she was made of glass, paint and fabric and to stop asking questions.

I knew she told me not to ask anymore questions but one more was boiling inside me and I had to ask her. So I put on my sweetest smile took her hand and asked if she would get me the doll. She smiled but said no, that I wasn't old enough to take care of her like I should, maybe when I was a little older. "But momma when I'm older this doll won't be here, some mean person will buy her and just leave her alone all the time making her even more sad!" My mom had heard enough."I told you dolls don't feel anything and were not buying it now go to the car."

I let go of my mom's hand ran back to the car and cried in the back seat. That doll was sad and all I wanted to do was make it better she needed me! I saw my mom, brother and Uncle walking towards the car so I dried my face and buckled up. As we pulled away I waved to the building and told the doll I was sorry. (As if she could see or hear me.) Of course my mom thought I was talking to her and said it was fine I just needed to accept the fact that I couldn't get everything that I wanted and to learn to control my emotions.

A few months rolled by and it was my birthday. We had a small family dinner and were just about to cut the cake when someone knocked on our door. It was a mail carrier with a big box. My mom signed the paper and thanked him with a confused look on her face until she saw the return address. "Its a package from your Uncle." I jumped up from my plate of chocolate cake and asked her to open it. When she did there was another box wrapped in party paper with balloons."It looks like you got another present, let\'s eat our cake and you can open it with the rest of them afterward."

I scarfed down my cake finished my milk and after helping with dishes was allowed to open my gifts. I saved my Uncle's gift for last because I knew he always got me something really nice. After opening my first two to find an American girl book and a locket with Eeyore on the face of it I was down to my final gift. There was a birthday card with five dollars and a note written inside that said "Now that your a year older, I think you can give her the love she deserves, Happy birthday we love you!"

I quickly tore back the paper to find the doll from the Vendor market. I was so excited, I carefully picked up the doll taking in every detail tears of joy streaming down my face, she was so beautiful! I put my doll up on the shelf in my room so I could see her whenever I wanted and mom let me call my uncle and thank him. I talked to my doll every night before I went to sleep and sometimes when I knew mom wasn't around I would take her down and have tea parties with her and decided to name her Samantha.

Surprisingly Samantha started a new tradition between my Uncle and I every year for my birthday or Christmas he got me a new porcelain doll, even up into my teens.

When I was 13 I moved in with my dad and of course my dolls went with me. My new room didn't have quite as much space as the one at my mom's but there was a huge shelf mounted to the wall. I had finished all my unpacking except for my dolls and a few pictures that needed to be hung up and I had school the next day so I told myself I would finish after school.

Later that night I heard what sounded like something moving in the box my dolls were in. Knowing my dad lived next to a field I thought it was a mouse, so I grabbed my flashlight, hammer in hand, slowly creeping over to the box. The closer I got to the box the more the movement stopped, I pulled back the flaps shined my light in there and didn't see anything but my dolls so I went back to bed and didn't hear anything for the rest of the night. When I got up to catch the bus the next morning I noticed that Samantha was laying on the floor next to the box.

I thought it odd but had to go so I didn't think on it much more. Later that afternoon I decided to put my dolls on the shelf across from my bed so I could make the room look nicer; it was almost the exact same from when I was little and my brother and I went to visit, down to the pink faded walls.

I decided as I was carefully putting my dolls on the high shelf that since most my dolls were out of their boxes I may as well take Sam out of hers and that by doing so it would look nicer. So I carefully cut her from the strings and mounted her on the stand straightened her dress and put her in the back since she was one of the taller ones placing the rest of the dolls around her.

As I was carrying out the boxes to the burn pile I noticed something strange about the box Samantha was in, the name Alyssa was written on the bottom of the box in black sharpie. I thought maybe that was the name of the former owner and shrugged it off though I questioned why I was just now seeing it considering I was the one who dusted her box and kept it clean.

I tossed the box in and started the fire, made a quick check and light up a smoke like usual when I burned trash I knew my dad would skin me so I had to be careful. I was watching the fire making sure it stayed in the burn ring when there was a massive POP and the fire got huge and turned a bright blue.

I ran to the shed grabbed the water bucket dad insisted I keep handy and doused it out thinking maybe I missed something at the bottom of the barrel but nothing was in there but ash and bits of soggy boxes that didn't burn all the way.

Realizing it was 4:00pm I knew my dad would be home soon so I ran inside to start dinner racking my brain trying to figure out what would cause the fire to get so big so fast but couldn't think of anything. I didn't use lighter fluid or gas so it didn't make sense...

Later that night after all my chores and a shower I decided to be guttsy sneak out and have one more smoke. As I was going out my door and I swear that I heard a female voice whisper my name. Considering that I was the only female in the house, that was a bit creepy so I grabbed my coat and dashed out.

I light my smoke and tried to clear my head, "you're just tired and besides you know how to take care of anything that could be in the house. Whatever it is just face it!" I ducked out my cigarette and went to go back inside making sure to be real quiet because the screen door squeaked and dashed into my room.

Just starting to dose off I started to hear the female voice whispering my name again. I tried to ignore it but it kept getting louder until I could hear it in my head. I sat up shielded my mind and body and asked what it wanted of me, the voice changed from soft and feminine to a dark and low "Nothing you have freed me, and now I can have anyone I desire."

I commanded the spirit to leave it was not welcome in our home, it laughed and said "A weakling trying to command me!" I felt a sting on the side of my face reached up to find that I was bleeding. Filled with anger I demanded that it show its self, As soon as I said that Samantha came flying off the shelf and hit the foot of my bed surprisingly enough the doll did not shatter. I grabbed the doll and used a purification method that I was taught though the doll shook I did not hear another word for the rest of the night.

I woke up determined to stop things before they could get worse, the next morning I asked my dad if he would take me to the thrift store so I could take my dolls that I felt they were taking up too much space and he agreed, but asked why and what had happened to my face. I couldn't tell him what really happened because he is very religious so I told him that I was just getting too old to collect them anymore, and that my cat Meowie scratched me. After I got rid of them all I swore to myself that I would never own a porcelain doll again. As to how that spirit got attached to the doll I have no clue, but I know that I never want to run into it again.