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Living On A Possible Indian Burial Ground

 

My family and I live in an apartment, but every family has their own front and back doors, and everyone pretty much stays to themselves. Everyone has two floors. We have lived in this neighborhood since 1999, but only three years in this particular apartment. The other apartment we lived in is right across the yard from this one. It was just as bad as this one, but not as dangerous.

When living in the apartment before this one, I remember a man dying in this apartment almost a year before we moved into it. Since I was expecting another baby, and we already had a couple of kids, we needed more space, and since we had little money, this was the only option: to move into this apartment.

I had some reservations about moving here, but what to do? I had to move. So, here we are. Almost immediately, the problems began. My health has started to deteriorate since we moved in here. I was not sick before, and believe me, I have been sick for three whole years! In and out of emergency rooms, only to be told there is nothing they can find, but yet, I am still sick. I have had all sorts of tests, and nothing but minor things revealed. I miscarried last year, and I strongly believe these "things" killed my unborn child. They do not want us here. They do not want anyone here.

Some of the spirits I have seen have all been Native American in nature. There is a little boy who looks to be about eight or nine years old. He is mostly benign, and just watches us. There is a very bad woman with long black hair and a ghostly white face in the downstairs half bathroom. She usually appears in the mirror behind you. There is some spirit of unknown gender upstairs, but it is a very, very evil thing. It harasses me in the bathroom and upstairs hallway, and has been known to come into my bedroom and walk around by the wall across the room. There is some ghost which crosses the hall and goes directly into the bathroom but never comes out.

What I sense about them is that they feel we are all trespassing on their property and maybe they can't rest. My husband, who happens to be from India, slept in a separate room one night because he snores, woke up the next morning and told me that he had a very real dream about finding himself surrounded by Native American Indians, and they felt some sort of kinship toward him. They were basically discussing their feelings with him in the dream, about how this land belongs to them, and they don't want anyone living on it. In the dream, they were taking him around the neighborhood and showing him the land, and telling him it belongs to them, and that they want it back!

Back in 2006, probably in October or November, I thought I was cracking up. I was in the bathroom upstairs, and saw a spirit form in my older daughter's room across the hall. I saw me looking at it, but I tried to ignore it. Well, when I went back into my own room and started to read a book, that same spirit came and attacked me! It's like it jumped onto my head, and went down into my stomach. I started having the worst abdominal pains in all my life, and I've had a lot of kids! This was the worst! At the same time, I felt dizzy, and like something was trying to take over my mind. I had to fight all night to not be overtaken by this thing. How did I fight back? I prayed! Prayed like I have never prayed before. I was literally fighting for my life and my sanity. I instantly became a recluse, hardly ever going out. It's like I wasn't "allowed" to do anything anymore. I became severely depressed. When doctors prescribed me medicines to help me, they would make me violently ill. But, how to explain all these things to a doctor?

There is also the little matter or poisonous spiders somehow showing up in our bedrooms. The weird sicknesses which are experienced, but no doctor can diagnose. When you are at the top of the stairs, it's like you can literally see yourself falling down the stairs, and laying dead at the bottom! There are ghostly voices, too, but they don't talk to you; you hear them talking amongst themselves. At night, they all congregate in the living room downstairs where it is dark. If you come downstairs at that time, something tries to scare you and hurry you along. I dread coming down at night. The daytime is tolerable though down here. When you are in the kitchen at night, something watches you.

One night a few weeks ago, I was downstairs cooking, and I saw a small boy run past me from the living room and disappear by the backdoor. I thought it was my son, but he had not been in the kitchen. We used to hear a sound like bedroom slippers shifting along across the kitchen floor. Sometimes, I have smelled smoke, and neither of my neighbors smoke! It's like pipe or cigarette smoke. Sometimes there are pleasant scents as well, but not very often.

Presently, I am wishing to move out, but no money to move, so what to do? Also, I am still currently having ill health, and still running back and forth to doctors, and all to no avail. I have thought to have this area investigated, but I don't know the stories of my neighbors as to whether they have had any troubles or not. I would really like to find out.

If you want to know more, email me, cause this is getting kind of long. Thanks for listening.

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Comments about this paranormal experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, adelvita, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Crystalm (1 posts)
 
5 years ago (2012-10-04)
Wow sounds like a Horrible experience. Although what you have does seem like a demon I do believe it could be angry spirits. I had something in my home that felt extreamly evil and angry. I was going through some of the same feelings and issues you have. When I smugged my home with sage and told it to leave things seemed to be at ease for a few days but came back soon after with a vengeance! It smashed into my bed at night, the children in my basment suite woke up screaming 5mins later, my dog was freaked out and staring ears up at the corner, I could feel the hate! I was terrified! The next day I had someone very spiritual and in tune with the dealings of demons and spirits look into it. She found the energies in my home were native and the issue was the land! They felt disrespected! Thus the emence dark energy I dealt with when I told them to leave land that was theirs. I give them offerings of food, herbs and water and will be putting a cross in my back yard for them. Do some research, find out which natives resided on your land and what to offer them. Talk to them out loud (yes I know it feels crazy) explain you are sorry, you did not know it was their land, explain your situation to them and let them know you respect them and their land. Ask if you can help them finish their buisenss so they can cross over happy. Good luck hon
charlemaine (1 posts)
 
5 years ago (2012-07-01)
Adelvita
I saw where you said that you found out you had a lump on your thyroid gland. I just, just, (3 days ago) had my both of my glands removed. If they have only recently found it then this could be where some of your illness
Has been coming from. When your thyroid is off it can
Cause all kinds of havoc on your body.
Argette (guest)
+2
6 years ago (2012-02-11)
Thank you, Nysa.

I could not say it any better. But some people are not worth arguing with...
Nysa (4 stories) (685 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2012-02-11)
I find your comments extremely offensive & your attitude deeply disturbing. The idea that I live in the same country as people like you makes me ill. Judging people by what kind of movies they watch is despicable. Saying that people suffer terminal illness because they "sin" is abhorrent. Telling someone your god will deal with them is nonsensical. Not tolerating people who hold different beliefs than you is detestable.
GBust333 (6 posts)
-1
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
Nysa, I apologize for stepping out of line and my descriptions that upset you, was responding to your rants and expletives. We both need to not be so reactive. Most people in the south would never respond that way but then I have to remember that you and others could be from anywhere.

I won't relate so much info unless it is directly related, thought much of it was related to what the discussion poster was asking for. He has worrisome health issues and fears the spirits that he lives with to the point of wanting to move out. If others here share the same opinions and beliefs as Nysa then I'll probably focus more individual responses, if they are welcomed. Others here seem a bit quiet here, might be afraid to speak.

The methods I employ are thoroughly tested and proven, even from Biblical references. I have my own way to verify results which demonstrates my effect. I have no interest in communicating with spirits or documenting their characteristics. Once I confirm that they are present, I only want to eliminate them and counsel those affected to overcome their fears.

I admit I'm not open minded to others when they are using the occult or other means outside of Christianity. I would not have faith in God if I were more open to other world beliefs. There is no grey area with God, you are either for him or against him. He does not tolerate other spiritual beliefs.
Nysa (4 stories) (685 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
Fine. I don't think my response was any more inappropriate than Gbust333's but I will try to put it in more appropriate language. Gbust333 apparently you don't know, but there is a difference between offended & not pleased. I am offended by your ignorance & your attempts to spread that ignorance, not by which gods you choose to worship. As your god has no power over me I am not the least bit concerned with being dealt with as you childishly put it.
Miracles51031 (36 stories) (4802 posts) mod
 
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
GBust333 - religion tends to spark a fire that leads to pages and pages of, let's just call them "mild" disagreements, shall we? I'd say about 90% of the time, all these disagreements accomplish is a distraction from the original story. And this is a story that is almost 4 years old, so who knows whether or not this o/p is even hanging around reading the stories or if they will ever see these comments.

Simply, the religious "advice," well-meaning though it might be, can come across the wrong way sometimes.
GBust333 (6 posts)
 
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
Miracles51031, I have quoted other sources regarding my input and my own experiences. As you asked, I will try to refrain from preaching but simply quote my information and experience. There may be others like Nysa that clearly object to my participating but it is a valid method that I have experienced measureable results from.

I have other info to offer like in detecting a ghost presence and what happens after they were cast out. There is a substantial library of works available that demonstrate and support my methods and procedure beyond the biblical scriptures themselves.

I can keep my tendency to preach in check and just relate my knowledge, experience, and literary references to specific issues.
Miracles51031 (36 stories) (4802 posts) mod
+2
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
GBust333 - please read the following. It's taken from "Your Ghost Stories Guidelines for Commenting on a Story."

"This site offers discussions on the topic of ghost experiences, with people coming from various cultures, so please avoid proselytizing or preaching, unless the author of a story specifically asks to receive feedback from that religious perspective. This site is not about religious beliefs, it is about actual personal paranormal experiences and exploring reality with an open and investigative mind so we can actually learn more about the paranormal, with the same empirical mind set that made science so successful in other fields. Religions have a lot of wisdom to offer in terms of personal spirituality, but they can also limit our knowledge of the world with old superstitions and unproven dogmas. It's fine to share what your religion has to offer as a possible explanation, but everyone has their own, they certainly don't come here to be converted, so please, don't push it on others as irrefutable fact.
GBust333 (6 posts)
-2
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
Nysa, this website nor the Bible or God are exclusively here to please you. If you are opposed as a Christian, show me where the scriptures are opposed. If my Christian beliefs and scripture are what irks you, then only God can deal with you.
Nysa (4 stories) (685 posts)
 
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
You have GOT to be kidding! I am offended on so many levels by those comments, I don't know where to start. Maybe I can come back to express my horror after I am done throwing up.
GBust333 (6 posts)
-3
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
Adelvita, demons also commonly can aggrevate a medical condition, especially conditions like MCS, fibromyalgia, addictions (especially drugs or p0rn) and are also a spiritual component of common diseases like cancer, AIDS, diabetes, etc. Getting your soul cleansed of any and all demons would bring greater healing progress to any health issue. There is a clear connection between sin and disease, just read Deuteronomy Chap 28, note the many plagues and sickness suffered by those that ignore God's laws and statutes. I know that from Romans, Christians are judged by Grace instead of the law. I learned that when we fall out of covenant with God, THEN we are judged by the law. When you look up "God's covenant" in the Strong's Concordance, you find the 10 commandments linked as a definition. We are judged by grace until we violate our covenant with God, then we are judged by the law, then Deuteronomy chap 28 is relevant, then sickness can be a result of violating God's covenant.

A great book on the subject regarding the connection of sin to disease is "A More Excellent Way" by pastor Henry Wright, also see www.beinhealth.com

Http://amzn.to/yqJzvJ

Also, Pastor Wright has a ministry and week bootcamp that will help your health called For My Life:
Http://www.beinhealth.com/public/FMLOverview

God's desire for our health is not that we receive a miraculous healing, but that we never get sick in the first place!
GBust333 (6 posts)
 
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
My house was haunted with ghosts for 15 years until I learned how to deal with them. My neighborhood is on top of a Cherokee Indian burial ground. Some raw land next to my neighborhood has indian burial mounds which our burial zone is a part of. State archelologists confirmed it is a mound builder indian burial site well over 1000 years old, no telling how many bodies are around here. My rear property line borders undeveloped land that may have indian graves.

My ghosts did get physical with me. I work at home, had typical signs like doors closing or slamming, items flying off the table, then later they actually grabbed me on three occasions. I knew Biblically they could not hurt me so they never got what they were looking for. On 2 occasions they woke me when I dozed off at my PC, took my arms and shook me violently. I simply thanked them and got back to work. Weeks later I was wide awake on my PC when they grabbed my chair and shook it violently. I replied, "Oh man that felt good, can you keep doing that"? Needless to say, that ended their spook attempts.

I'm learning that indian burial grounds are more common than most people think. In my prayers, God wants me to look for other homes that might be living in fear of such ghosts. Georgia has more known haunted houses and graveyards than any state. Add to that the unknown indian burial sites and you have one spooky state. SEE:
Http://theshadowlands.net/places/georgia.htm

I'm looking in my neighborhood plus putting out fliers in other areas I know have a mound builder site close by or are near big civil war cemeteries.
GBust333 (6 posts)
-1
6 years ago (2012-02-10)
The ghost removal businesses I've seen in Georgia are either using a psychic or other pagan means like Tibet Munks to remove unwelcome spirits. I've been studying spiritual warfare using the strictly Christian method, solely by the authority of Jesus Christ. The process is basically the same as removing demons from a human. My rule regarding someone's home is the same as a non-believer. Where the power and authority of Jesus is concerned, a demon can not be effectively removed unless the Holy Spirit is also resident in their soul. Contrary to many other mistaken beliefs, Christians can not be possessed but they can be "oppressed" by a demon because of a unresolved sin issue which gives that demon permission to latch onto them. Members of that house family should all be baptized before any cleaning of the house itself.

Watching horror movies is a great example, seems harmless to others but it is an actual sin like watching p0rn, gives that demon permission to enter your soul and slowly tear you down.

I know many churches disagree with my belief that in order to be saved one must BOTH give a sworn statement of faith in Christ as their Lord and Savior to a church pastor AND also being baptized in water by that pastor or other ordained minister. See Mark 16:16 and John 3:5 for further clarification on the Baptism requirement.

I'm basically treating a ghost like a demon. If non believers are present when a demon is cast out, they are in danger of that demon entering them since the holy spirit is not present in their souls. I believe there is no valid reason to assume a ghost is not a demon, better safe than sorry. If the family of that house is truly saved, then after cleansing that house, both the family and that house could also be truly blessed inside and out.
J3Z (6 posts)
 
8 years ago (2010-03-07)
Lol everywhere is an indian burial ground, the europeans killed most of us raped all the woman and girls then took our land gave us shiatty little specs of land and took our children from us to be punished in residential schools for being aboriginal. Messing up their heads and since they are so messed up they mess up their children and drink their life away trying to make it better because they don't know what to think. I mean how cruel can you be to not even care about a human race so much that you can bear to build a city onto our loved ones who passed away...

Sorry to spazz out but I'm so sick of people getting angry at us for these things. Everything above IS TRUE. This is a giant piece of history left out JUST because they didn't want to seem mean. The Canadian Holocaust.
adelvita (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-22)
I used to live just across the yard in the other building. There were still spirits, but no health problems, no sicknesses. I have now just found out that I have a lump on my thyroid gland. 😢 Who knows when that got there, how big it is, or if it cancerous. 😢
adelvita (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-22)
I do not maintain a dialogue with spirits of any kind. I don't wish to. Yes, the illnesses could be environmental, but it is not likely since no one else is sick in this neighborhood.
adelvita (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-22)
To Commentors:

My apartment is in Bloomington, Illinois. My front door and most used door faces west.
whitebuffalo (guest)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-13)
Hello again, adelvita, is it possible to know what city this apartment is in in Illinois? I was researching another story, and was trying to find an Indian mound in Illinois also.
The reason that I am asking is that the various tribes performed their burial rites in a variety of manners. SOME of them use a "protection prayer" for those that have passed on. It is believed that if they are disturbed, the prayer is "broken", but CAN be mended with the correct "counter prayer".
I would have to know the tribe, though, and in your giving me the city, I could check and see which ones were in that area and research to see if THEY used that practice.
Thank you.
Flutterofwings (13 stories) (428 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-13)
Wow this is has gotten out of hand. Not by the people who make the comments, but the story itsself.
First of all everyone does believe in their own God no matter what the name goes by. Sometimes if enties don't want someone around they can hassle you like this. Have you tried to talk to them? Many enties only want to be known. They are like children if you don't pay attention to children they will do something to get your attention.
Entities may in this case just like you to know they are here. And with pushing them away just makes them stronger the next time.
Trying to have the house or apartment blessed don't always work, in fact may cause what is going on worst trouble. I feel there are more then one entity there who are trying to get your attention for some reason. Just remember the weaker you are to these entities the stronger they become off your energy.
racemustang (guest)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-12)
If it is possible, I understand that finances are tight, could you get ahold of a piece of Cedar Wood? Just a piece big enough to sprinkle the dust above the doorways and along the windowsills. May I ask in which direction your most used entrance door is facing?
Bellissima (12 stories) (792 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-12)
Hi adelvita. Most importantly, your story, your troubles. It seems you certainly have your share at the moment. I am in no way discrediting any of your accounts, but when you spoke of the constant illness, my mind, like Kecoughtan's, wondered about the possibility of environmental factors. I think if there was any way for you to move from there, it would be a good idea. For your physical and mental health, it definitely can't be easy to face and worry about. You said your previous apartment was as bad as this one but not as dangerous, ideally I think you should try to get out of the complex. As for having an investigation done, with a little digging you could probably find a team who would be willing to investigate your situation.You've prayed, continue to do so. Use symbols that represent your beliefs to give you strength around your home. Do a blessing or a smudging ceremony (there are instructions on this site for smudging). Try stating freely that you want the spirits that are there to move on to where they should be, with loved ones waiting to be reunited with them. Tell them they disturb you and your family and they're not welcome to do so anymore.I'm sorry for your failing health, that is such a terrible thing, an intrusion into your life. Good luck, please keep us updated if anything changes.
I enjoyed reading the debates, not really appropriate here but sometimes... My comment is -new ideas flow in for consideration and flow out with fresh thoughts when we have an open mind, whereas new ideas flow into a closed mind, hit the wall and bounce back out but nothing fresh falls out either.
faerielike (15 stories) (268 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-12)
My goodness it looks like a religious war on this page!
Demonbinder, I just wanted to say the offering are a good idea. I thought what you might want to try is that time when they gather in the living room, maybe you can sympathize with them and let them know you will be going as soon as you can, but until then, please live in peace with you. I know tobacco is supposed to be a peace offering, especially to evil spirits, but maybe at that time you can make an offering of some sort for peace. Just let them know you hear them and feel their pain. Sometimes it just takes some understanding and acknowledgment.
Good luck and keep us posted on how it goes! ❤ 😊
ChrisB (6 stories) (1515 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-12)
I have to say that everyone believes in what they want to. No point in trying to say which religion is better or whos God is stronger. But the most important thing is in what WE believe. If you believe in Christ that's good if you believe in Choclate cookies that's great too! But we must respect in what others believe. And I think that is written in everyones book. To debate about this is realy no point. Just have faith. Believe in what YOU want to believe. I hope to hear from you soon and take care
whitebuffalo (guest)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
Please excuse the intrusion, once again, adelvita.

Demonbinder, I refuse to debate my religion with anyone. I KNOW the facts of what I believe, and I have already stated them.
It is NOT a "Common fact". A FACT is indisputable. It is "A real occurrence; an event. Knowledge or information based on real occurrences."
My belief is compiled of years and years of research, living it, thinking on it, praying on it, and in studying various OTHER religious ideas. I am not an innocent person who is living the religion of my parents. This is MY religion, and that is one thing in my life that NO ONE messed with. Under ANY circumstance.
MY religion is compiled of separate other religions that compliment and contradict one another. MY religion is MINE, and NOT something that I have read, looked up on the Internet, or borrowed from someone else.
You MAY read in various places that WORSHIP is what is done, but I can assure you, that is NOT the case. Perhaps it was hundreds of years ago, maybe even as recent as fifty, but presently, it is NOT the case. Why do you not speak to people OF THE religion you choose to quote so freely?
Honestly, it is QUITE like the Holy Bible. There is an Old Testament as well as a New Testament. And the directions in the two sides seem to conflict, BUT the time line was vastly different. One is BEFORE the crucification of Jesus, and one is AFTER. JUST as in any other religion, things happened to cause a CHANGE.
I do not push my ideas on anyone. I do not try to force others to believe the way in which I do. My path is not an easy one, but it IS the one I choose. Religious intolerance is one of the biggest reasons for conflict in the world, and I will not willingly contribute to anything that COULD harm another being.
I am an open minded person, but flagrant disregard to others religion is NOT tolerated well by me.
Peace, and Good Will to you.
Martin (575 posts) mod
-1
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
Demonbinder, don't put words in my mouth I haven't said. "A religious book among many others in this world" doesn't translate into "a farce, full of made up fairy tales". Does it have to always be absolutes? It's either the only truth or it's a fantasy? No, all religious teaching have some value, and they're all tailored to the society and culture of the time they were created.

As for the entities using christian references, it happens when those harmful entities are souls that passed on from a christian culture or are using those references when dealing with christians victims. If you do some reading, you'll find out that ghosts from other cultures actually make references from these other cultures, and exorcisms rituals from other cultures (indian, asian, etc) are also effective.

But that entails that you actually do read and open up to other cultures, which christian conservatives are not actually known to do.

Sorry all about this off topic diatribe, narrow mindness and dogmatism are a bit of a pet peeve of mine, as you can see. 4 out of 5 dentists recommend reading, traveling and meeting different people (offline or online) to alleviate symptoms.
ladyannne (11 stories) (91 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
Wow, so many thoughts. Reading the stories and comments here have opened up so many thoughts, not to mention new questions and musings. Just when I thought it was safe to believe what I do, someone brings up something new, and a truly possible concept. Back to the drawing board.
Whether we are Christians or not, Indians or not, I think I can safely guess we won't have all the answers until we enter the next world, be it the Big Hunting Grounds, Heaven or Hell. From what we have all seen, something exists, period. There has to be an after life of some kind, some place, or we would not be here sharing these tales from beyond the grave. What it is, where it is, remains to be seen, and those of faith, no matter the denomination of faith, hold it dear to ourselves. It doesn't mean my type of faith is right, it is right for ME. We all have to find our own paths, and I can think of a few other places to search, including these pages and people.
Evil, menacing spirits, negativity and scary events are not right for me, and I would go to any length to prevent experiencing them again. I also consider myself blessed in that I have never encountered anything that tried to harm me, in any way. These are truly beyond my experience.
Meanwhile, I only ask to be allowed to have my beliefs, without forcing them on others, judging others for theirs, or anyone putting mine down, and love meeting open minded people who are of the same mind, also too few and far betweenst. There are so many things we do not understand, no matter our religion or beliefs.
I pray for those who are having any kind of demon or negative force in their lives find a workable solution, soon. Prayers and best wishes, Adelvita!
Demonbinder (66 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
whitebuffalo, if I may say that in a better way, then yes. Common fact has it that a lot of tribes worship spirits. That is not unique to Indians, as it is done a lot in many other 3rd world countries, Africa being another major scene of this. Are you Indian? It's been my understanding that some tribes live in fear of some of the attacking spirits, and give them offerings to attain there temporary appeasement. I'll go back and search for more detailed facts on the specific tribes if you want.

Martin, if the book is a farce, full of made up fairy tales, then can you give me a few good reasons why theses entities continuously curse the name of Jesus, and are adamantly against him?
Kecoughtan (1 stories) (211 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
When you lived in the previous apartment did any of these experiences or misfortunes occur, adelvita? Is it possible there are environmental factors influencing your health and general well-being? Some poeople are especially vulnerable to these. Molds, gases like radon, and chemicals used in construction materials can really mess up one's health. My aunt and uncle once moved because of their physical reaction to the materials used in the remodeling of their apartment. I'm not suggesting that you did not experience the incidents you shared with us, but I am wondering if the spirits may not be causing the harm--that that the negativity and poor health is a result of your physical apartment. I once lived in an apartment for less than a year. During that time I had the worst run of luck, sleepliness, and negativity. My plants were dying and I was breaking glasses and plates almost every week. As soon as I moved (into the building next door) everything was back to normal. I know it is difficult for you to consider moving at this time, but your health and disposition are vital. Maybe something affordable will open up in the same complex and spare you the expense and effort of a big move.
Tonith (1136 posts)
 
9 years ago (2008-09-11)
Could it be that you are overworked and under rested? Only you know this. Not saying there are not spirits in the place but you don't have to let them drain you. Take charge and tell them to let you alone. If you feed into fear it's not a wonder you are in the emergency room all the time. Sorry but this sounds like a case of I'm really tired and no one seems to be listening.

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