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Asking To See Others


lthough this is not a scary story, I need some help.

I have always heard that if someone has passed that before you go to sleep at night you can ask God to let you dream of them. There is a reason for me asking help from the contributors of this sight as I have read a lot of posts that some of you have written. If someone on here doesn't know then I am lost.

My Granny that I wrote about in my story "A Husbands Last Promise" died almost 2 years ago and my Papa died almost 9 years ago. I have never dreamt of my Papa and I have only dreamt of my Granny once.

About two months after she died, my kids and I were leaving from my parent's house. It was about 9 pm and it only takes me about 15 minutes to get home. When I was about 2 miles from home, I was going through a traffic light and was almost hit by a transfer truck. The driver had run the red light and luckily, he was able to stop about a foot from my vehicle. This scared me to death and I was shaking for the rest of the way home. When I got home, I called my parents to let them know that we had made it home and about what had happened.

I don't know if it was because of the trauma that had happened earlier but that night was the only time I have ever had a dream involving my Granny. In my dream, she was dead and she was lying in her bed at the house. There was a golden broach that was pinned on her dress. I didn't like the placement of the broach so I moved it. When I did, my Granny opened her eyes and started gasping for air. This freaked me out and my mother closed her eyes and kept repeating, "I'm not seeing this, this isn't happening". My Granny kept telling me to come and touch her, that she wasn't cold anymore. I told her no and got in my car and left.

When I got about 2 miles down the road, I looked and Granny was sitting in the passenger seat of my car. She told me that she wanted to come home with me because now everyone thought that she was dead and she couldn't go back home. I told her that I was sorry and that she couldn't come home with me. I dropped her off at a little diner and just drove off.

I want to dream about her and to let her know that she is welcome to come to my house. I want to be able to dream about her, even if it is about things that happened years ago. I just want to be able to see her again.

Any help that anyone has would be greatly appreciated!

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, bette31, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

bette31 (9 stories) (127 posts)
16 years ago (2008-08-28)
lilblackpom-thank you so much for sharing your experiences with me concerning your brother Chris. I talk to my granny about every day just to let her know that I still love her and miss her tremendously. My children still bring her up on a daily basis and we talk about photos that I find with her in them. I tell them stories about things that we did when I was little and places that her and Papa would take me. I was able to bring all the home movies to my house and we will occationally watch them in the living room. It is amazing, the bond that you and your brother still have. No one is ever gone, they will always be close to our hearts!
lilblackpom (13 stories) (218 posts)
16 years ago (2008-08-28)
Yes bette. I also believe what Rebelboy says. I am a firm believer that if you are still in the grieving process, going to the cemetary for a visit will help you. When you said that it is just their shell, you really reminded me of Chris! He was adamant about that and would never go to see Grandma or Dad at the cemetary. He would always pray for them on his own. He told me this.

Thank you bette for talking with her as I seen for your post above. It really does make you feel better. Take care of yourself ❤
lilblackpom (13 stories) (218 posts)
16 years ago (2008-08-28)
Hello bette. Sorry this is long. I am reading a number of your stories tonight because I find them to be well... Very interesting to me. This one in particular is. I have only had 2 dreams with my brother and they are posted on this site as you know. I don't have any more experiences like these with Chris. I never asked for those dreams to happen, they just did. When I pray at night, I talk with him, my dad, my grandmother. Of course I miss them dearly. These are the only 2 vivid dreams that I can recall with my brother. I wanted to hear my brother's voice because I missed him so much and missed talking with him and the dream in England came upon. I wanted to see his face again and give him a hug and the disguise came about with the CN Tower. I know for a fact that these two dreams I had were with Chris because (1) He came back to haunt me in England and he ended up visiting there on a trip and (2) He knew that I would never go the CN Tower in Toronto, Ontario. He was not a demon or anything like that. I don't even believe in demons. I believe there are evil spirits/ghosts from evil people here on earth. This is what I believe. These dreams were not scary and Chris was very peaceful talking to me, the same Chris voice but a little more peaceful. Other people might not believe this but I am a true believer in this. You will know if it is not your true loved one.

I recall when both of these dreams happened, they weren't close together and actually were months apart. They took place the following year after he passed so they were very close to the date of his death. The whole year following his death was so hard for all of us. I cried tremendously but only before I fell asleep. He gave me comfort with these 2 dreams and wanted me to have a laugh also. I knew my brother well enough to know it was definitely him. But I have never had this happen before until these two dreams. Bette, I haven't had any others, only these two. And that's okay.

I have never had a dream about my grandmother only little odd things like a song on the radio playing in my car every time I turned to one station. Same song would play and remind me of her. Bells ringing also because of what happened at her funeral. Every member of my grandma's family experienced something. You will know though.

With my Dad, I have never seen him in a dream and we were very close. I did experience seeing a man dressed like him walking in Florida (where he wanted to move) and I was with my husband and aunt and uncle. They seen him too and then he disappeared.

So, these two dreams with my brother happened when I was most tired. After Chris passed, I really didn't sleep good and I was always a heavy sleeper. But just talking to your deceased loved one after your prayers or during the day while you are walking around your home is so comforting. I do this all of the time. My husband is used to it now and he knows it makes me feel better doing so. I think about them every day and will for the rest of my life here on earth. But I try to be positive because otherwise, it can affect you healthwise.

I feel you miss your grandma. So try just talking to her daily, even if you are cleaning the house. Then ask her for a sign to know that she is okay. The sign could be a butterfly flying around you outside unexpectedly, a bird singing unexpectedly, something on this order. I have done this many a time with my Dad and my brother and always receive a beautiful sign from God. You will know though and then you will smile and know it is your loved one. I hope I am helpful to you. God Bless You Bette. ❤
Rebelboy1987 (9 stories) (186 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-24)
There is no shame in grieving. I mourned the passing of friends and family. And it STILL hurts to think about them not being here to experience life. It is much easier on the ones that have passed than the ones living. I just try to remember that its good for them since they never have to experience pain ever again... Well those that go to heaven anyways. Thanks again for your story!

bette31 (9 stories) (127 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-23)
Rebelboy1987- Thanks for the comments. My grandparents are buried up in the mountains and we (my whole family) were up there a couple of weeks ago for "Decoration". My Papa's family has their reunion and the next day they go to the cemetery and decorate the graves, hence the name Decoration. I cry everytime I go visit the graves. I know I shouldn't because that is not them that are buried there, that is just a shell of what they used to be. Then again, I guess grieve is just a human emotion.

I am glad that you now have a sense of peace with the passing of your own grandmother. I have always been taught that you start to die the day you are born, but it still hurts when it is someone you are so close to.
Rebelboy1987 (9 stories) (186 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-23)
I just realized you have already gotten the peace you needed. Graveside visits will put you at ease if you ever feel the need to talk to her though. Talking to her like she is there is always the best advice. I'm glad you don't ask to dream about her anymore. Sometimes the wrong "person" will hear you ask that and give you a dream about her that you really don't want. Glad you're doing better though

Rebelboy1987 (9 stories) (186 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-23)
DUnknown just gave you the best advice. I always had resentments after my grandma died. I thought it was my fault because I didn't pray hard enough before her sugery. I knew everyone else was praying for her, and I felt so selfish that I hadn't prayed but once. I just figured it was nothing and that everything would be ok.
It was just a simple procedure to take out some pollups on her ovaries. She ended up getting a blood clot after the surgery and died right then. I felt so bad about this. Thinking "this is what I get for not praying". And it ruined my thoughts for a long time. I would pray for forgiveness but it never made me feel any better.
One day almost a year later. I finally got up the courage to visit her grave. I got to talk to her, and it finally put me at ease. I no longer felt bad for what I did or didn't do. She assured me that she was ok and it was just her time. It was the most peaceful I have ever felt. You should definately try it. Thanks for sharing.

Charmed (1 stories) (7 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-18)
I cried when reading your experience, I feel the same as you regarding my grandma. She has been gone 10yrs and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her. I just sent in my experience I had with my granmda. Keep your grandma at heart and let her know your thinking about her. By the way I also called my "grandpa" papa 😊
DUnknown (4 stories) (65 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-11)
bette31, my advice is visit her grave, give respect and prayers. Bring your family if you want, this will really help a lot. Try talking to her through your mind. Tell her everything you wanted to say, and add her to your prayers as well as your others diseased loved ones. Don't forget to give thanks for every each day you're breathing. Prayer is really adviced-whatever your religion is.
IBelieve (3 stories) (31 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-11)
My mother died when I was 13 and I have somewhat of a past with the supernatural, so when she died I told her that I loved her but didn't think I could handle seeing her. And I never have 16 years later (while awake) But at very stressful times or life changing events I dream of her. The last dream I had she was in a rocking chair holding a baby in a blue blanket. Nine months later I had a little boy. At the time of the dream I had no idea I was pregnant and didn't even think I could get pregnant. I don't know if this will help but atleast you know your not the only one 😊
JohorMsia (16 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-10)
I am touched, I believe your Granny understands that she had to leave. I know you feel sad but please forgive youself.
bette31 (9 stories) (127 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-09)
Once again, thanks for all of the wonderful advice! I took some time last night to "talk" to her. I let her know how missed and loved she was. I also let her know that even though she was missed very much here, that I am sure that the love she has received over there has been wonderful. She is finally with the ones she has loved and missed for all of these years. For reasons known to many on this sight, I have chosen not to ask to dream of her. But to talk to her as if she were here in the physical form. I can honestly say that I feel like a weight has been lifted from my heart by doing this.

Thank all of you for helping me to realize that all of the sadness and grief is only for us in the human body. As she has no more grief and sadness within her...
keekee404 (1 stories) (23 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-09)
Dreams are basically events and images held in our minds that we replay, sometims with twists and different perspectives. But, I also believe that when we sleep, our spirit leaves our body and can go into the "spirit world" until we realise where we are, then for some reason we wake up.
Anyways, I believe that this dream was not one of those that you made up in your head, but one where your spirit has traveled somewhere.

"She told me that she wanted to come home with me because now everyone thought that she was dead and she couldn't go back home..."

I think that she wanted to go back home to her family, that she didn't want to be dead, but she was dead and she couldn't return to her family. If you said yes, her spirit may had went to your house, and the results could vary. Since you've said that she couldn't and dropped her off somewhere, her spirit isn't in your house (I'm not saying she isn't watching over you, but not being a poltergeist)

Whew... That was alot! But, like I was saying, I think that in your dream your spirit visited your Grandmother and she was debating on whether to return home to her family or not, probably because she was dead and didn't want to be.
Any future dreams may be just your mind, unless she wanted to make contact again for some reason. All we can do is hope!
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-06-09)
I should also mention that it is MY belief that once you Cross Over, there is a certain level of mind reading ability that goes along with you. Whether you say the words aloud, or in your head, the message WILL get across to her. Provided she is in the position to receive such information.
Thanks again.
whitebuffalo (guest)
16 years ago (2008-06-09)
Oh Honey, I have to say again what KimSouthO already posted. Please be careful what you wish for.
While in the dream state, our minds take over. Sometimes the dreams are prophetic, and tell you, or warn you about things. Other times they are simply fabrications of our thoughts and should be viewed as only a fictitious tale that you have come up with while your body rests. At other times it can be either a one way communication, or even a two way communication between two spirits. These communications are also called visits.
You can have the same kind of visit while wide awake, however. To keep yourself safe (there are those who masquerade themselves as our loved ones in order to gain our trust) I would suggest speaking either verbally or mentally with your Grandmother while you are awake. Just go about your usual routine, and interject a few comments directed towards her. In this way, you will be alert, and able to function in the appropriate way, should you need to back out of the situation.
As always, and with ANY form you use t communicate with Spirits, wrap yourself in the cocoon of White Light for protection. Never try to communicate with anyone without that in place.
Thank you for your story.
wanderer (6 stories) (71 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-09)
You shouldn't feel guilty about things you dodn't say to your Grandma. You can still say what you need to say to her even if she is not physically with youMaybe the dream of her in the car with you was her way of showing that she was with your family when you were in danger.
bette31 (9 stories) (127 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-08)
Thanks for all of the advice. I am going to try to talk to her tonight. I have been doing a lot of searching within myself and I am now finally at a point where I can let go of all the guilt that I have been bottling inside.
Tonith (1136 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-08)
If we are at peace with someone's passing I think we tend to have good dreams about them. If not then it can lead to bizaare dreaming. I rarely dream about dead people but have on occasion. If a dream is vivid and not hazy I think that is a direct communication from beyond. Sometimes it's hard to interpret the meaning being that we carry our own emotional baggage and therefore confuse their objective with our own limited understanding. Many people would give anything to see a dead loved one again in their dreams or in their house. Others just freak out and are not good candidates for that kind of communication. I agree with saying out loud what you have wanted to say to your grandmother and giving her permission to come to you in your dreamstate. It can be very comforting but can also be disturbing which I think depends on your emotional state when requesting a visitation.
faerielike (15 stories) (268 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-07)
First off I totally agree with Rhodes.
Also I find the dreaming trick you spoke of does work. There have been times I have done it, where I know I dreamed of my Pap Pap, but I just cannot remember the dream. There are times I do remember, and times I partially remember.
Keep trying, I am sure one day it will work. Or you never know, maybe when you stop trying that will be the time it works! 😆
Sabrina12993 (2 stories) (56 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-06)
Your grandma may miss being with you.
When you have the time pray for her, tell her how much you love her and that she is welcome to come in your home anytime.
She may feel like your not happy about her death, well nobody's happy about death but maybe she has her doubts that you may think shes not with god.
I could be wrong but I'm Just trying to help out. 😉
bette31 (9 stories) (127 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-06)
Thanks for the advice. I guess I have had so much guilt within myself that I don't want to let her go. I feel like I have missed my chance at telling her that I am sorry for all the things that I feel sorry for. Thanks again!
KimSouthO (27 stories) (1960 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-06)
Please be careful what you wish for and to what lengths you will go to have that granted. Proceed with caution and faith.

God Bless!
rhodes68 (14 stories) (1596 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-06)
bette31 hi.

The way I interprete your dream is that your grandmother's statement that she is no longer cold was a way of telling you that she has transcended from the physical realm. In our world when a person dies, the bodily functions die out, blood stops circulating, causing the temperature to fall but in the spiritual world the spirit or ghost doesn't have a physical body to use;a body which in reality is an imperfect tool and is subject to decay.

If it was just your accident in relation to the dream of your granny sitting in the passenger's seat, I'd say she wanted to protect you, to let you know that she was there when you were nearly hit and used her powers to stop you from getting hurt.

But there's something about her request to follow you and her sadness for the rejection of others that sounds a bit different to me. Just my opinion, but maybe what the dream really means is not that you are not the only one who has a hard time accepting her death. What if she's held back from accepting her own death as well? Have you considered that your own feelings are somehow preventing her from crossing over?

Try to speak to her-even if you think she can't hear, I bet you she is. Tell her all that's in your heart, how much you miss her and how much you wish you had more time together. But then, also tell her that she needs to stop worrying about you since you know that once she crosses, she would still be paying you visits to check up on you, and make sure you're safe.

Remember that death is not strong enough to seperate us from those we love. They are still part of us, part of our inheritance, and we are part of them, part of who they were in life and even after it.
pinkroses (1 stories) (33 posts)
16 years ago (2008-06-06)
Not to sound so vague, but verbally ask your grandma before you go to sleep to appear to you in a dream, tell her that you want to see her in your dream and be able to talk with her like when she was alive. Also tell her you miss her and that she is welcome in your home anytime. Say all this to her verbally when you are alone and not to loudly but in a gentle voice. Hope this helps. After my grandma passed away, two weeks later I had a vivid dream that I was in her house in the back looking out the window and she was in her garden bending down working, she then stopped and looked up at me with a big smile on her face and look so glowing and happy. I knew she was saying goodbye to me.

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