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What Would You Call My Ability? Requesting Help/information

 

If you have read my previous stories, you will know I am no stranger to the paranormal. I actually consider existence after death to be natural, almost like a cocoon shed by the energy of your soul. In general I don't fear death or dead people. The living are bad enough thank you. This is a hard won, years long lesson and I was not always so calm about it.

I'd like to share a... Gift? I have... Highlighted with vignettes of the gift manifesting. I don't quite know what to call it, and I hope, after you read the vignettes, someone can tell me what my gift is. Not how it works, but what the actual name for it is. I don't 'see' dead people or even talk to them. I consider the vignettes to be ghost stories because they discuss presence after death but I am not entirely sure if I am submitting this to the right board. I'm sure you'll let me know.

I don't see dead people (In general, like a medium does).

However, I 'feel' them. Let me tell you about one of my first memories. I have 4 brothers that I met, however, I had an oldest brother, Johnny (my son Johnnie was named after him.). Johnny only lived a week. I never met him and I didn't learn of him until I was almost twelve. This presence was actually a constant, like a toothache, throughout my childhood years.

My mother had locked a treasure hutch. She kept all of her precious mementos in it. Twice a week she would open the heavy ornate lock, open the glass doors, and piece by piece, take everything out and dust it. One of the pieces was a baby blanket, cable knit brushed cotton, yellow and soft as down. I had no idea it had been Johnny's but whenever I was anywhere near that hutch, I breathed in a feeling of emptiness and confusion. I knew, just from those emotions that a boy, a baby, one who felt 'void', was gone. When I learned of Johnny, it made sense.

Growing up, sometimes I would come across places that I could... Feel? I would breathe in and know something, usually age and gender of someone who had passed in that place. Apartment and house hunting could be an experience.

One of my jobs was in a hospital. During renovation they temporarily (that became permanent) located me in the basement, down the hall from the morgue. My husband was a lab tech and autopsy assistant. It actually became a bit of a game to us. I'd walk by and breathe in and I'd just know, Forty something male, very angry, unexpected death. Or full term stillborn, sad, lonely, confused. Or, older, seventies woman. Acceptance - she knew she was dying.

Not once was I wrong. This was a routine that went on for months. Hubby would try to trip me up, thinking I was cheating by stopping at the morgue, but sometimes I'd just stand at the end of the hall and breathe it in. I really can't explain it any better than that.

Again, they did not speak to me. It was like there was a scent, an air? That told me about them. It didn't feel personal, like they were directly communicating with me, but like it was just something lingering in the air. Also the biohazard/waste incinerator was down there and I never got that kind of info from a 'part'.

Okay, I hope that is enough to give you guys a clue. It never did me. Does anyone know what to call my 'gift?' Or am I just haunted?

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, MaggieMay_Not, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

MaggieMay_Not (4 stories) (15 posts)
 
2 days ago (2017-12-10)
L_Melb - Thank you - and yes I'd always thought Empaths were for the living. However, the line between life and death... Some religions believe in a rapid burial to put the soul to rest quickly, while others believe the body should be left in state for up to three days to give the spirit time to adjust. I can't really say which is right or wrong. I can say that recent deaths <week are much stronger. Some longer than that can be strong but not many. A lingering sense stays, and to be honest, I can't think of a single time that has been longer than two years to receive an impression.
MaggieMay_Not (4 stories) (15 posts)
 
2 days ago (2017-12-10)
Destinygirl - No apologies necessary. I am not even sure this counts as a ghost story so there is no real 'off topic' here. I'm glad the comments helped. I've found them a great comfort as well. It can be disconcerting to know someone you just met broke their arm when they were ten, or dream about a blown up awning, address numbers swinging from the force of an explosion, only to see the exact on the news a few months later... Finding out it was a gas leak explosion. Worse for me was when I was in the military and dreamed of a midair collision... I know the planes, new the numbers, KNEW what would happen, and all I could do was watch... So yes... Talking about this stuff HELPS. Don't hesitate to ask if you are worried or upset. My hubby is... Skeptical supportive and let's me talk to him freely. I hope you have someone like that in your life.

Maggie
MaggieMay_Not (4 stories) (15 posts)
 
2 days ago (2017-12-10)
rookdygin -Thank you for the kind comments. Sometimes people don't get why I don't go graveside or near the beloved because I death and don't explain (Crazy stigma - I usually say I don't do well with leave it at that) and that has caused some harsh comments, but I will take that over possibly having a panic attack because I cannot breathe, or breaking down from all of the emotional overload. Worse is the horrible sucking void that I have encountered a couple times, when a child (ages 4-5) close to me passes. It is an emptiness that I swear pulls at my very soul. It feels like I'm being drawn into a sucking whirlpool of ice, buffeted by icy winds. It's as if whatever soul had been there left so quickly, it left a void that is trying to be filled by anything, anyone. Okay break out the 'crazy' stamp and hit me with it. That's just what it feels like to me. Thankfully it has only happened twice, once with my son and once with a first cousin. Ah shoot, I do ramble. THANK YOU! I guess that does leave the question, does anyone else share this gift? And how do you work with it?

Maggie
MaggieMay_Not (4 stories) (15 posts)
 
2 days ago (2017-12-10)
Bart43 Thank you, and you know, outside of playing the 'game' with my husband, I've found that sometimes, just once in a great while, I'll say something to someone at the funeral/meal that seems insignificant or unconscious to me, but has a profound impact on someone else. I don't believe I am passing on messages so much as reminding them of something they already knew. For example, once, at the funeral of a young family member who died unexpectedly from cancer everyone believed she was winning, there was a sense of melancholy, loss, and yearning in the air around me, One of the other people there was going into meltdown because she had been put in charge of the music and she couldn't find anything she considered appropriate. I felt... Something... And in my minds eye I remembered them both dancing to the Macarena just a year before... It was out of my mouth before I knew what I was saying. The people around me froze, but the girl freaking out looked at me with a look of amazement, then said Yah... Oh Yeah... And the dance song filled the air. I swear, all of the loss and yearning vanished and the room felt lighter. I could BREATHE again. And the somber, loss and yearning changed to joy as everyone seemed to remember she LOVED TO DANCE and SHE HAD TOLD THEM TO BE HAPPY FOR HER WHEN SHE DIED. Again, it wasn't really mediumship, it was just knowing and sharing what the feelings were and what I thought would lighten them. I hope this explains things.
L_Melb (202 posts)
 
2 days ago (2017-12-10)
I am really no expert (I mean it, NOT expert!) however could this be a form of empathic ability?
I have always thought of those who see themselves as empaths having abilities that are triggered by the living - but as I said earlier, I am NO expert and of course I may have misunderstood (hence off on the wrong track?)
The way you describe being aware of details no one has told you of those who have passed, made me think of empaths and as we have some who visit here, I would find their view interesting.
I imagine I really need someone to tell me if empaths only relate to the living or are there "various" forms?
DestinyGirl (5 stories) (13 posts)
+3
5 days ago (2017-12-07)
Please forgive me if this post is inappropriate, and I will totally understand if it is deleted. I do not mean to "hijack" the thread, but after reading Melda's and Maggie's comments about seeing "flashes" of the future I wanted to cry. I've had dreams my whole life that would come true, but over the past few years or so I started having episodes where I thought I was almost thinking things into existence.

Very recently it occurred to me that I am probably having premonitions of some sort - and they sometimes make me feel like I'm losing my mind.

I just wanted to say that seeing your comments helped me realize that other people do have these "flashes" that circle back around in various ways. I don't feel quite so crazy anymore.:)

(Again - I am so sorry to take these comments off-topic, but I wasn't sure where else to say thank you for sharing your experiences!)
rookdygin (24 stories) (4350 posts)
+1
5 days ago (2017-12-07)
RC is right on the money it seems.

"Clairsentience, which means clear sensing, is the ability to feel the present, past or future physical and emotional states of others, without the use of the normal five senses. Psychics who are clairsentient are able to retrieve information from houses, public buildings and outside areas." (not my words)

Maggie, I am so glad you have found a way to 'handle' your Gift. There are many individuals who would prefer to just 'get rid of it'. However if you stay Faithful I believe that 'still soft voice' will guide you as you move forward in your quest for understanding the Gift that has been given to you.

Please ask any questions you may have...

Respectfully,

Rook
BART43 (2 stories) (9 posts)
 
6 days ago (2017-12-06)
You got a great gift. Treasure it. You never know. God maybe gave it to you for some reason. Maybe usefull someday, to yourslef or maybe to help others.
You can study more on developing the ability or just enjoy them. Its up to you.
MaggieMay_Not (4 stories) (15 posts)
+2
1 week ago (2017-12-05)
RCRuskin, thank you - Clairsentience is as close as I've ever found/heard. I'll just keep calling it Maggied (LOL) for less of a mouthful.

Jitow - Thank you. Yes God and I have a close relationship. I've learned to lean on the Creator for most things. I will continue to do so.:).

Jubeele! Thanks for the Link. When I get the chance I'll peruse the link.

Melda - You and I have a lot in common actually. Flashes of future events... Knowing stuff about a perfect stranger... Seeing a dream played out on the news... They are things I am familiar with, although to be honest, ever since a wiccan friend taught me to close my third eye, not as much. The knowing... That isn't changed by closing my third eye, at least not that I've found. I actually avoid funerals because of it. Being near someone (like down the hall at the morgue) is like breathing in something in the air. Actually being around the body... It's like swimming in it. Needless to say as an adult female, with a large family/extended family, my refusal to attend funerals has made for some awkward moments. I found a work around though. Believe it or not I offer to setup/cater the after viewing/after funeral meal. That way I am respectful AND helpful - and I don't drown/suffocate in that feeling of breathing in whatever it is that hits me around dead people.
Melda (9 stories) (717 posts)
 
1 week ago (2017-12-05)
Maggie - There are a number of members here who can assist you far more than I can.

I deal with the paranormal the only way I know how and this I have learnt through experience. I have seen many spirits in my lifetime and at other times feel their presence.

I also have dreams which materialise (sometimes only a year or two after the dream) and I experience "flashes" in my mind about events which are about to take place. The dreams and the flashes don't always pertain to myself or my family, or even close friends, but somewhere along the line I'll be told of such an event which happened to somebody else.

I'm only telling you the above, not to make you listen to my experiences with the paranormal but to let you know that you are not alone at all.

There are so many ways in which people experience the paranormal - I find it quite fascinating!

I honestly cannot put a name to my paranormal life either. Perhaps RCRuskin is quite correct in calling yours "clairsentience". I find your experiences at the morgue fascinating. It's as though you sense the emotions of those who have passed. That's empathy, I think. But knowing the numbers? That's something else!

I'm also looking forward to reading the comments you receive from other members.

What I would like to ask you: Would you rather be without this "gift"? If it were suddenly taken away from you, would you feel a little bit lost?

Regards, Melda
Jubeele (5 stories) (330 posts)
 
1 week ago (2017-12-04)
Dear Maggie, you have an amazing ability. As to your next step, that's up to you. It's a path we all travel, though some will tread on roads less travelled. But I believe you have the strength to keep yourself safely grounded, no matter what life (or afterlife) tosses your way.

Here's link to an article on different abilities from our sister site:
Http://www.psychic-experiences.com/psychic-articles/types-psychic-abilities.php

There may other information there that help you too. Keep us posted as to your progress. Sending you my very best wishes. ❤
Jitow (355 posts)
-3
1 week ago (2017-12-04)
My hunch is that the gift is from God and He wants you to seek His will for your use of this gift. He is the Spiritual Gift Giver, but there are also spirits out there that seek to pervert the gifts that God gives us. One thing is for sure, God tells us that He is not the giver of the spirit of fear, but the Giver of love, of power, and of a sound mind. I'd check with Him first.
RCRuskin (7 stories) (247 posts)
+1
1 week ago (2017-12-04)
Interesting. I think that is what I would call your gift. Clairsentience, or however it is spelled as it is a word I don't often use myself, seems to fit. My browser is suggesting clairvoyance, but you're not seeing anything, but knowing a thing.

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