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Knocking On Heaven's Door

 

Dear Readers, I have been advised to issue a "tissue warning" for all the em-paths, out there. I shall start my tale, at the very beginning of our Angel's life!

At 5:20am, 23 July 1970, our third and last child was born... A beautiful baby girl. We named her Angelique, which was soon shortened, to...Angel. Angel was a very bright child, full of love, laughter and wit. As she grew up, she caste her beautiful magic spell over many people, bringing joy and happiness to all who knew her.

In March 2002, Angel got married, amid much jubilation. In August 2004, she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl; Shenay. This child was to become the centre of Angel's world!

In September 2008, Angel's death sentence was signed; she had the dreaded 'big C'. She had been misdiagnosed with 'groin-strain', for the past 18 months. She battled on bravely, through numerous operations; radiation and two lots of chemo therapy. She lived and breathed for her little daughter, Shenay.

On Sunday morning, 3rd June, Angel was taken to hospital, in great pain, by her friend and neighbour, (we will call her K.) Midday, Tuesday 5th June, we got a call from our eldest daughter Nicky, who was at Angel's bedside in hospital. She said, "Come quick, Mom. I don't think Angel has much longer!" We jumped up from the lunch table, where Ray (my hubby) and I had been entertaining my brother, who was visiting from New Zealand. We rushed the 50 - 60km to Alberton, taking my brother to see his niece, for the last time.

When we arrived, Ray and I were shocked to see just how much she had deteriorated since the day before. The previous day, on the way back from playing with her mother on the hospital bed, Shenay had stated, that her mommy would not be coming home this time! At the end of visiting hours, Ray had to take my brother back to our home; Nicky stoutly declared that she was not leaving her baby sister. I wisely decided to stay with her as well. We kept the long vigil at Angel's bedside, during the evening and long, gruelling night.

Nicky, very attentively, ministering to her sisters needs; wiping her forehead and giving her sips of water. At one point, Nicky asked Angel "Are you scared, to die?"Angel's answer..."No!" Angel was on oxygen - full strength, her breathing was in short gasps! I sat holding Angel's right hand. (I had sustained a bad back injury, the previous Friday and couldn't stand for long periods of time.)

Sometime around 2am, Angel stopped making the horrible, rasping noises. (I didn't know it at the time; it was the "death rattle", that had been going on, since early the previous morning.) Nicky and I jumped up, thinking that the end had come! I noticed that her eyes had rolled back; only wide slits of white were showing. When Nicky asked, "Is she sleeping?" I answered "Yes"...I wasn't sure, but I didn't want to alarm Nicky any further... She had been crying copiously, on and off during the night.

Nicky dozed on her arm, while holding her little sister's left hand. At around 4am, Nicky roused to use the adjacent bathroom. While Nicky was in the bathroom, I saw a shadow pass quickly over Angel, from her feet, to her head. My first instinct was that Nicky had opened the bathroom door; but no. I quickly looked behind me, as the only source of light was above a mirror on the far wall, behind me. Nothing was to be seen. I asked softly "Dad, is that you?" No reply! But my 'jumpy' feeling subsided swiftly.

As Nicky emerged from the bathroom, I asked the stupidest question, "Did you see that?" Of course, Nicky asked "What?" I proceeded to tell her about the shadow, she was stunned! (I had been praying that my Dad would come to 'fetch' Angel, for a few hours already.)

At around 5:30am, I went outside for a smoke. It was still very dark, the sky heavy with clouds, heralding the cold front. As I stood shivering, smoking my cigarette, a Cape Robin flew down, settling on the paving, only a few feet from me; I believe that Cape Robins are pretty shy, so this was unusual in itself. There was no sight, or even sound of other birds yet. It looked up at me, in what seemed to be an enquiring way. It proceeded to peck at unseen specks, looking at me all the while. It eventually flew away when someone arrived at the hospital gates. It left me wondering... Was that a spirit?

On my way back to the ward, I stopped off at the nurse's station. I spoke to the Night Sister, telling her that I had never watched a person die before. I asked her if it was possible that the oxygen was the only thing keeping Angel 'there'. She answered, that it was possible. She then followed me to the ward, and tried to get a response from Angel. (Nicky protested, "Let her sleep")...to no avail! Next, a nurse came into the ward, to take Angel's blood-pressure and pulse. She could get no reading. She walked out, muttering something about the machine being faulty... I knew better! I just knew that our Angel was knocking on heaven's door!

This is when my "miracle" happened!

What happened next will stay with me to the end of my days... Angel opened her eyes... Directing them to look straight into mine, as I leaned over her. It was like... A meeting of souls! I told her how much I loved her; how brave I thought she was; that I would never forget her and that she must wait for me on the other side. I probably said a whole lot of other comforting things to her as well, I don't recall everything; I was too distraught! My last words to her were, "My special Angel, rest in peace." She then took a deep breath... And exhaled... And was gone from this earthly plane. I glanced at my watch; it read 6:10am.

When "K" (Angel's friend, whom was looking after Shenay) arrived at the hospital, sometime later, she told Nicky and me how Shenay had woken her at 5:40am. Shenay told "K" that she had a terrible nightmare, her Mommy was dead. A man, dressed all in black, had 'killed' her mother and taken her away. My text message to "K", informing her of Angel's passing, only reached her, after she was already at the hospital, which was just after 7 Am.!

Two mornings later, my husband, Ray, awoke in the dark, to the sound of a voice. The voice said "Dad, don't worry, I am in a happy place!" But, the voice didn't bring him closure. He says that the voice wasn't Angel's, it sounded like his own voice! I told him that it was most probably the only way that Angel could communicate with him. He must just accept that he did, in fact, get a message from his precious Angel!

On the 18th June, was Ray's birthday. As he walked into our lounge, he heard Angel's voice say "Happy birthday, Dad!" He whipped around, expecting to see Angel... Nobody was there. Her death was still so new to him... It really sounded as if she were in the room with him. When realization dawned on him... He went to the 'shrine' in our dining room, (picture of her with flowers and a candle) to thank her.

About five weeks before Angel's death, I had a very vivid dream. I dreamt that I was standing on a hill, overlooking a seaside city. As I watched, the city disappeared like mist before the sun. I was faced with a vast shore. I looked to my left, out to sea, to see a huge tsunami forming. I looked forward again, and in the distance, I saw the form of a person. As the person drew nearer, I recognised Angel. I started to run towards Angel, as she ran towards me. I looked to my left again, to see the tsunami looming nearer. As Angel and I met, we joined hands, running together from the tsunami. I awoke before the tsunami struck!

I told Angel about this dream. Neither of us could figure out what this strange dream meant! Only since Angel's passing, have I managed to interpret my dream (I think). Death was the tsunami, crashing down on Angel, and changing my life forever! But, we were together... Till the end.

Thank you to all of you, who stood behind me in my time of grief. You will never comprehend the measure of comfort that you brought to me. You Know Who You Are!

Humbly,

Fergie

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Comments about this paranormal experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Fergie, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
 
7 years ago (2018-01-17)
Bee_Beans,

Thank you for reading this account. It is so old now, I was surprised to see the name come up on my feed.

The intense pain of our loss has lessened, but not gone completely. Your condolences are still welcome, thank you.

Angel still 'visits' every now and then, though not as often as before. She usually makes her presence known by her perfume, or the smell of fresh-cut roses. I only heard her voice on one occasion.

Thank you for your comment, I appreciate it. 😊
Bee_Beans (6 stories) (41 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2018-01-17)
Note to self: ALWAYS pay attention to the Empath warnings!

What a beautiful and sad post. My heart really goes out to you and your family. I'm glad that Angel is in a happy place.

Peace
kayraa (3 stories) (22 posts)
+1
8 years ago (2017-05-25)
Fergie,

This story is heartbreaking, I can only imagine your sadness and sense of loss.

I'm happy that you have some piece of mind in the form of Angel saying she was not afraid, in your father being there and in Angels visits to her father ❤

Best wishes,

Kayraa
Triskaideka (2 stories) (388 posts)
+1
11 years ago (2013-12-20)
Haha well I'd love to post something but my experiences were not of the ghost variety. Demons, perhaps, but not ghosts. I've only ever had two ghost-related *dreams* and I don't really feel those count. Dreams are pretty normal for anyone to have. 😊
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
11 years ago (2013-12-20)
I'm sorry about that Triskaideka, but you can't say I didn't warn you.

When are you going to post an account of your own? You seem pretty knowledgeable, and intelligent to boot. You admit to "something" happening when you were younger, so come on, join the club of loonies here. 😉
Triskaideka (2 stories) (388 posts)
+1
11 years ago (2013-12-20)
Yep, definitely needed tissues. Thank you for sharing this. ❤
JennZ (72 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-02-14)
Thank You Fergie! Yes it is hard... And what was the worst is, My Mom Beat lung cancer, and 2 months after that she got it again but in her back... It was so bad it broke her back! So it was really hard... But Thank You Very Much for your condolences. Everyday gets a little easier... I will definitely let you know when I post my experience.
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-02-14)
JennZ, thank you again.
I know, cancer is a horrible way to go... It's not easy to watch the suffering either.
My condolences on the loss of your Mom. It is never easy to say goodbye to a loved one.
I will keep an eye out for your submission. 😉

I am honored to have you favorite this one too... Thank you.
JennZ (72 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-02-13)
Again So Sorry 4 your loss... I thought I cried when I read Angels Feathers... I lost my Mom, Feb. 2 2011 from cancer... I have an experience to post, but just not ready yet... But anyway, your story Really touched me. If you don't mind, I would like to also add this story to my favorites... Thank You Fergie
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
 
12 years ago (2013-01-18)
My dear friend Trix, I am so sorry, I never realized that you had not read this account before. I remember your condolences in the past, but I thought they were on this narrative! I now realize that it was long before.
I am sorry for your tears my friend... Nothing strikes a blow, like losing a child! That is just not the order in which life Should happen!

Thank you for your lovely comment, we appreciate it. ❤
Trix (14 stories) (407 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-01-16)
Hi my friend... I thought I'll be strong with this one today but unfortunately I just graphed the tissue box. I'm so sorry for you and your family loosing Angel. My dear friend nothing will ever take that pain away by losing a child. We can only learn to live with it and go on with life here on earth even if it doesn't make sense sometimes. The only thing that comforts us is the fact that we know we will see our loved ones again and this time it will be forever and ever. They look down from Heaven upon us and sometimes come to visit us. Like we will never lose that bond with them-they will never lose that bond with us either. Thanks for sharing this with us and letting it out. Sometimes we take live for granted-your story is such an inspiration for me. You and your family will always be in my prayers. Take care Trix. ❤
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-01-13)
Thank you, Indigo Child, for your kind words. This account was difficult to write... Bur as for being brave? Umm, I'm not too sure about that! Our daughter Nicky was our 'rock'...she knew much more about her sister's 'details', than her dad or I did. Apparently Angel confided everything to Nicky... Not wanting to 'worry' her dad or myself unduly!? 😕 So, with all due respect, I think Nicky was the 'brave' one!

The big "C" is a terrible 'curse', whether it be for the sufferer, or the family! When it is advanced, (in my opinion), it is just better to pray for a swift release! I prayed for my mother-in-law's swift release too. She had cancer of the liver.

I am so sorry for your loss, and suffering. I mean that from my heart... I know what you are going through! 😐

Dreams can help us 'prepare' for the future, or to bring us comfort. I have had only a few 'prophetic' dreams in my life; but in retrospect, they were a help/comfort. Take courage and comfort your loved ones around you... Death is not the end, but a new, brighter beginning!

Thank you for reading my account, and for sharing yours. Be strong, your Mom will need your support!
Indigo_Child (3 stories) (25 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-01-13)
Fergie, thank you so much for posting this story. You are incredibly brave as I can imagine it must have been so hard to write this. I lost my nana in 2009 to the big C and my grandpa is currently battling advanced prostate cancer and I'm not sure he has much time left. Its breaking my heart to see my mom go through losing another parent and I am sad to say goodbye again but am glad that they do indeed go to a better place! Your story has helped me realise that sometimes death is a welcomed release from the struggle of cancer.

I too have premonitions in my dreams and I dreamt about 2 weeks ago that my granpas dad (whom iv never met nor do I know his name) came to me and showed me a photo. The photo when I first looked at it had my granpa, my nana (gran) and my aunt and my mom. Then when I looked at it for a second time my nana and my dapa faded away out of the picture. My granpas dad told me his name - he said "John will be there" and when I woke up I realised this dream was perhaps trying to tell me that my granpas dad will come for him and that all will be ok.

I asked my mom later that day what my granpas fathers name was and she said his friends and family all called him by his nickname: John.

My mom was so freaked out by my dream. But I didn't tell her all the details of the dream. I don't want to upset her. She's going through a hard enough time.

Sorry for sharing my story on your post... Just thought I'd share it. I dream bout my nana all the time. She was an empath like me and could see her late mom too so she was the only person in my family who ever believed my stories. I miss her but she's in peace.

Thank you once again for sharing your story. I was bawling my eyes out!

Love and light.
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-01-03)
Hi Sammie,
I thank you for your good wishes, and are returning them to you X2. May all your dreams be nice ones; and all your ghosties be kindly! ❤ Fergie
samtillie (5 stories) (242 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2013-01-02)
Still so touched by your story... Happy New year Fergie, love Sammie x x x x x x
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-12-06)
KRYS, my dear friend, thank you for your kind words. 😁 This was the most difficult account I have ever had to write. But, in the long-run, it was therapeutic!
It is so good to see you back!
Love you too girl...

[at] DragonStorm & squareface, thank you both for the condolences.

[at] rebskp, No reply is ever too late! Thank you, I agree, that is the best way to deal with a situation like that.
KRYSTALLIA (64 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-12-06)
Fergie you are one of the most sweetest and bravest people I have "met". I know how difficult this must have been to write and I would like to thank you for sharing it with us...It's going to my favourites... Love you lady...
squareface101 (1 stories) (14 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-20)
i am so sorry about your loss I apologize if me writing this makes you feel uncomfortable. 😐 😢
rebskp (15 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-17)
Sorry for the late reply.

But yes we haven't had a natural death in our family for many decades:/ We cope by letting each other know that each person who has passed on had a great life and will no longer suffer. I think that's the best way to cope with it:) Lets just say they are probably happier wherever they are.

Thanks again for the great story,
Rebskp
DragonStorm80 (1 stories) (440 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-16)
You always think you can make it past a tissue warning... I'm so sorry for your loss but so glad your angel left in peace and may now possibly be your angel and guiding light in future things to come fergie.

Thank you for this story.
MizMiMi02 (8 stories) (56 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-16)
Likewise Fergie, I always enjoy your accounts. 50 50 50 characters 😊
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
 
12 years ago (2012-11-16)
MizM, it's so good to hear from you again. 😁
I thank you for your words of praise, I can only tell things from MY perspective. Nicky may have a very different account!
I agree, Angel IS just that now.

Thank you so much for taking the time to comment, I appreciate it. 😊 (For the warning? You are welcome.)
MizMiMi02 (8 stories) (56 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-16)
There is nothing to say Fergie, this was a WONDERFUL account. You had such an excellent relationship with Angel, and she is just that now. And thanks for the tissue warning, I was prepared.:)
triden07 (70 stories) (279 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-14)
Fergie
Thanks for your kind words. We have survived it and are stronger for it (my relationship with my boys is something I treasure above all else, cannot say the same about their father).

I would not wish this kind of pain on any parent
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-14)
Oops Triden, it was the wrong penny, that dropped! 😕
I only saw the tissue warning, AFTER I read what you sent me. Luckily, I do have a box of tissues right here by my PC, for just in case. I have been caught unawares on previous occasions, so now I am prepared in advance!

I am so very sorry that you and your family had to endure such trauma. 😢 My heart goes out to you. ❤
triden07 (70 stories) (279 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-13)
Fergie
It is sent. Waiting to hear from you. 😉 Just keep tissues handy, please.
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
 
12 years ago (2012-11-13)
Shure triden, any time you like. My PC is in my home, so there are no 'restrictions'!
triden07 (70 stories) (279 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-13)
Fergie
May I send you an e-mail? It'll give you a wider scope of my story (insider information) 😜
triden07 (70 stories) (279 posts)
+1
12 years ago (2012-11-13)
Fergie
My story, atleast, had a bit of a happier outcome, but when you are in the throes of tragedy of this nature, the world around you becomes insignificant. I'll give you a shout when my story is published.
Fergie (40 stories) (1159 posts)
 
12 years ago (2012-11-13)
OMG triden, the penny has just 'dropped'! I am so, SO sorry. 😢
I agree, it is a life changing experience - one that I would not wish on anyone! 😐

Thank you for the great compliment. You are amongst my favorite posters already.

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