I'm sorry, this is a long story, it has been happening from as long as I can remember. I don't know what else to do.
Basically, from as young as I can remember I have always been able to see spirits faintly. But as I got about the age of 6/7 I was living in Portsmouth with my mother, father and two brothers, I had always felt as though someone was watching me. I began to be able to see a man, but only as a faint figure. I began to be able to see him standing at the end of my bed, it seemed as though he was watching me. And I would always get a scared but very angry feeling when he was around.
I had one night frowned at him whilst laying in bed, the head of my bed was under a window ledge where my dad had put my old curtain poll, long, thin metal one, after I frowned I saw him walking toward the head of my bed, being young I got scared and put my head under the covers and, perfectly timed, I poked my head up and the curtain poll was dropped onto my head and he was gone.
My parents had always said that they tried to get rid of him, they also could hear his heavy footsteps coming from my room.
My parents broke up and after a few years of living with my mum and my little brother, I moved with my dad. The same things were happening, I could feel him watching me but I couldn't see him at all anymore, he'd always be walking around my room when I was downstairs and we could all hear it.
We then moved to Essex, in a 3 bedroom house. I could feel him around me more and more as I got older, but for years I could never see him, it felt like he was watching me more, it got to the point where (sounds weird) but I didn't want to get dressed unless I had something to cover myself with. The walking around my room became more frequent and louder, I have never been able to hear him, but I started hearing my name be called repeatedly. The first time I had ever seen him was when I was in PE (during school) and we all had laid down. I had my eyes closed (we had to do yoga as part of our exam) I felt as though someone was staring at me, I opened my eyes and a tall man, with short dark hair was leaning over me, I couldn't see his face. I obviously panicked and sat upright but there was nobody around me standing. That was the first and last time I could see him.
At 17 my father had kicked me out and I had nowhere to go, I had moved in with different friends and everywhere I went it seemed to follow me. I then stayed with a very good friend and her mother and I stayed there for about 6 months; but during these 6 months the sound of walking around was louder. Whichever bed I stayed in, whether it was in the same room as my friend or in a spare room, it sounded as though he was jumping off of the bed I had slept on.
I moved into a shared accommodation and I had constantly felt him around me, everywhere I went, he was there, constantly feeling angry and quite scared at the same time. I had my best friend stay at mine whilst I was away on holiday for a week, but he didn't follow me for that week, he stayed there. I never told my best friend about it because people would think I'm being silly, but she had called me up saying that there felt like someone was standing at the end of my bed (where he usually stood with me).
After 7/8 years of not seeing my mother, I had got in contact and moved back down to Portsmouth, obviously he followed me. I stayed with family. There had been a few nights in a row when a lot was happening to the point where it began upsetting me. I could hear something tapping on the doors, windows, tables anything that was around me. I felt like someone was stroking my face and holding my hands. The dog wouldn't leave my side the whole time this was happening, I couldn't even use the toilet without him forcing his way with me, he would growl and bark for no reason but everyone else was asleep upstairs. I felt a lot round me, and it didn't feel nice at all. The tv kept muting itself (I don't know if that's related but it was happening that night)
He is still to this day with me, I can definitely feel him around me. I have gone to see all kinds of people about it, I wouldn't tell them anything about me but they seemed to know everything, some of the most personal things to me. I had a lady bring it up to me while I was having my aura photographed, she had mentioned the tapping, saying something was trying to get my attention. And someone had also said that he isn't my spirit guide, but he's not going to hurt me. They described him as an angry man that had some kind of military background. I don't feel scared around him anymore, I just feel as though he is watching me, maybe taking care of me I'm unsure.
I really would like to find out who he is and why he is following me, if there's anything I need to know or do. I tried doing meditation and allowing him in the room with me but it felt like I wasn't supposed to talk unless he wanted me to, the meditation was first time in a while that I've been scared of him because I saw him but more detailed than the first time, an angry man that doesn't want to hurt me.
Is there any possible way I can find out why he is attached (if that's possible to know) whether he wants to tell me something or not? Do I know him, maybe a family member that I haven't met? I'm unsure whether he is actually an attachment but I have been told he is. I would like to know why he's with me and maybe get someone to help him to the other side. I'm sorry that it's long, I just don't know what else to do