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Sleep Paralysis Over The Years

 

It has been some time since I had stopped having nightmares every night. Like the past few years, I can count on the tip of my fingers about the instances where I had seen such dark dreams that I used to get emotional the whole morning after waking up.

Maybe it has to do with a lot of things I had suffered throughout my childhood. Bullying in fact lots of bullying until 9th grade, getting diagnosed with PCOS patterns at 14 years old, negative body image, obesity, a lot of weight issues, in fact, migraine, and not-so-healthy familial relations. Maybe this post won't get published because this is not exactly a "paranormal story".

I have this vague recollection of being touched and a larger weight pressing upon my shoulder and chest for a longer period and felt someone was lifting me by my waist. I still remember being unable to move even a finger, and that I was awake yet unable to open my eyes. I don't have any recollection of whatsoever that happened after that. My mother told me that I woke up and told her the giant king is trying to take me. Then I went back to sleep.

Please be with me and bear some patience because going down this memory lane is taking a lot from me.

I had this incident again at a very tender age, where I went to this maternal relative's home in Kolkata. I don't remember the man's face or anything. All I remember are the touches. The man touched me in places he shouldn't have.

Now even though I left the city after that, I never had that urge to visit that city anymore. I went to the city every year during my summer break but it used to give me a headache to be around male relatives. I started having sleep issues.

Now coming to the topic of sleep paralysis. I don't know when was the first incident or how it started. But I remember having this nightmare during my 9th grade when I saw or rather felt pressure right against my chest. The pressure kept increasing to a point where it reached behind my neck and I couldn't move to come out of that state. After that night, I firmly told my father that I won't come back to the city anymore. I never told him my reasons for not liking Kolkata. Also somewhere down being the youngest of all paternal cousins, I used to get attention from all male and female cousins. I started hating that attention and being babied where getting touched even on my cheeks annoyed me.

Some of the sleep hag incidences occurred in Canada as well during my stay over there for four years. It always happened somehow whenever I was going through a ton of stress. I remember going through one of the most toxic relationships with a man who was almost 15 years elder than me. I always ignored the red flags in the beginning and ended up having anxiety and nightmares every day where I always was getting chased by dark shadows. Now to think of, somewhere down due to this and poor diet, I ended up having GERD. Nightmares every day, and sleep paralysis just got to another level This time, I started seeing actual forms of demons in my nightmares.

I remember during the time I was staying in Victoria in Canada, despite being a warm night, I was shivering the more I walked down the street of Verdier Avenue in Brentwood Bay. I was going to a resort where I did the night shift. I am sorry if I am not being descriptive right now and unable to tell you what exactly what I was going through. I only remember getting this feeling where I was getting followed on such a dark street. I kid you not, but I was indeed getting followed by something. I still don't know if it was a human or spirit or what. But there was this pit bull that used to always go mental at night and bark at people who walked across a stretch of the street near to the porch of the house where the dog's kennel was made. One cannot avoid that part of the street at all and not get the dog annoyed. He started barking at this shadow form which was walking first behind me and then it went ahead of me to avoid the dog. The dog got even more territorial and started barking. It ran across the road and came towards the shadow figure ahead of me. I thought the person is now going to get it. But no... The form disappeared out of nowhere right in front of me and the dog came to a standstill becoming as if confused. He kept looking in that particular direction and then saw me. I was getting annoyed by this time, but thankfully, a woman came in front of me and shooed away the Pitbull. I was scared by the sudden presence of the dog, and the vanishing act of that figure in front of my eyes.

After this incident, I still remember being so scared that when I was coming back in the morning, for the first time ever from being an insomniac, I became a person who mostly spends her time only sleeping. I slept for straight on 35 hours once on my two days off during this time when I was doing this job in Brentwood Bay. Blame it on the stress or job or whatever, I saw a green slimy demon with two big horns and malice in its eyes once in my dream. I still remember the dream even today as if I just had woken up and seen it. I saw a basement under a large Victorian era house, where one has to go through tons of stairs and then some hidden cellars to get into this underground level. The door was iron padlocked and someone opened it. Then I was pushed inside and saw this green slimy demon with big boils and blisters all over its body and it was covered with scales. I saw its black eyes and it just kept looking at me with such curiosity. I can never forget that gaze. It felt as if he is looking inside my soul, including my thoughts as well. I had this fear for the first time ever I had felt in a dream.

I had seen lots of nightmares and had sleep hag incidences as well, but the fear wasn't to this level. I felt a danger to my physical health as well. That fear went to such a level that when I woke up, I was frozen to a state where I was screaming for my brother who was in the other room. But no sound came out of my mouth. I realized after some time, that I am still screaming but it's going inside my mind. I, for the first time, felt tears rolling down my eyes in a dream. It never happened to me before.

Then the last sleep paralysis incident happened last afternoon. I was going through emotional turmoil for the past few weeks, maybe this is the reason I felt this way. I fell asleep in between my assignment. With my glasses still on my eyes, during my small afternoon nap of maybe 20 minutes, I felt someone sitting beside me. It was rather a female form and it was touching me on my chest and then its hand went back to my neck and down my spine. I wasn't able to wake up but I can still remember the touches because they happened just yesterday with me. I remember waking up with a bang sound which I can still hear and my heartbeats were racing.

That's all from my side! For some reason, I feel better. I cannot recount all sleep hag incidences that occurred to me and I know this is more to do with my mental health. I had dropped a lot of unhealthy habits and had paid attention to my diet in the past few years. It has helped a lot and even started doing exercises to make myself calm.

But the nightmares don't stop. They don't occur every night but when they do... Those are cruel. Sleep Paralysis yes, that had stopped. Maybe last evening was just a warning to take care of myself even more but what to do with the bad dreams...? I am tired of it. I seriously don't think this post will get posted but if it does, thanks to the moderators and the YGS readers. Sorry for my grammatical errors if there are still any, despite my editing. I wrote it the moment when I was going upheaval of different emotions, to uplift myself and unburden some of the negative emotions I was going through that time.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, TheSweetDevil23, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Hima (1 posts)
+2
1 week ago (2021-09-15)
Hi TheSweetDevil23. I have suffered from sleep paralysis myself many times during my 12th standard to graduation. It's really scary. Hope you are doing well now.
The_Lost_Voyage_11 (2 stories) (87 posts)
+2
2 weeks ago (2021-09-05)
Hello TheSweetDevil23, good to hear from you again. The answer to your first question about a guardian lies in a post I made on your other story, the one, where you experienced the entity pacing outside your room and the one that appeared inside your room near you and you felt its anger. To try and give the short response here, if I understood your experience right, it seemed as if the one that appeared in your room was the more harmful entity, and the one you left behind that was also unable to follow you to the room you moved to after your experience. The one pacing in the hall and living room seemed more docile and when you mentioned it came to the entrance of your room and stood there when the other entity inside the room interacted with you, sparked my interest. The pacing kind of reminds me of someone on guard duty. I believe its presence also kept the more malicious entity from following you to the new room.

You mentioned that you felt the presence that had been pacing when it came inside the second room and touched your mattress, had a soothing effect on you, it was more peaceful than the encounter you had inside the other room and the other entity couldn't enter this new space. This is where I get the impression of a guardian or protector. You can go back and reread the initial post I made and it may be more clear.

I think this entity was a kind of protector, whether a previous resident, a deceased relative, or a guardian angel, it knew of the more malicious entities presence and seemed to be watching out for you. I believe it kept it at bay in the first room you were in and shielded you from its presence when you moved to the other room. I just get the image of the restless pacing as being akin to a security guard on patrol and in its response which was very quick to the other entity when it invaded your space in the first room and tried to hug you. Hopefully that makes sense but I will be glad to elaborate if you need me to.

To your second question, the presence you feel. When you sense it what do you feel? You're sensitive to the supernatural, that much is clear, so you could be coming across spirits any time any place they are, that is a gift that will be with you always. It's also possible depending on what you feel when you sense this presence or presences that it could be the protector/guardian I mentioned, letting you know now and again that its still there. It is also possible it could be the entity/entities you've experienced before, waiting for a moment when you may relapse so it can feed from that negative energy again. It is possible it could have attached to you. However if this is the case, I believe if you continue taking care of yourself it will lose interest on its own. I'd have to know more about the circumstances of when you encounter this presence, is it familiar to you, how does it make you feel? That would be a better indicator of what it could be. More importantly what does your intuition tell you it could be? It's always good to look for the logical solution for sure, to reason it out, but I find my intuition/gut instinct is always correct and that usually defies any logic. The more you trust your gifts, the more you can work with them and much of what you encounter will make more sense. Take care and good luck!
TheSweetDevil23 (5 stories) (22 posts)
 
3 weeks ago (2021-09-04)
Hi Rajine and The_Lost_Voyage 11. To address first query from Rajine, yes I know where n when n why this problem of mine started. I had already pointed out various things in my post. Some are already mentioned as also again pointed out by Lost Voyage as well in the above comment. Spiritually I believe it lies somewhere down to my being agnostic as well... Till now I tend to question a lot about my beliefs and the experiences I had years ago... Some of it baffles me to date even now. It was already tough for me to believe in spirits and energies but as I mentioned before in a reply to one of the previous post that it creeped and bugged me that whatever I had felt, experienced and gone through during my early 20s had been validated through other people's experiences. It's different to expereince paranormal but its even more difficult to have sleep paralysis and study about it years down the lane and learn that it has something to do with my own paranormal experiences... 😨
Now coming to Last Voyage... Something about your comment intrigued me.
Your comment about me being protected by the presence of a guardian or guardians made me curious. Can u let me know how you came to that thought or deduced something like that? 🤔
Also yes... You are right... When I became more positive about my health... I realised those entities had loosen their grip on me. Also I have a question... After I had those experiences in Agra in 2011, I had felt a presence sometimes randomly n rare like once or twice a year in some random places... Is it just my imagination or can it be possible that something is attached to me or maybe I can feel a vibe here and there once a while? See I am asking this because despite facing so many things in my life, paranormal, abnormal or even normal stuff, I had realised it's better to question rather than just believe in something randomly... It had helped me a lot this way and made my life easier... Waiting eagerly for your responses...
The_Lost_Voyage_11 (2 stories) (87 posts)
+2
4 weeks ago (2021-08-28)
Hi TheSweetDevil23, good to hear from you again. Thanks for sharing your experience, I know it cannot be easy for everything you are going through, but you are a brave one. I know you mentioned you had dropped some of your bad habits, watched your diet, exercise, etc, and you also mentioned some mental health issues, I assume from some of the experiences you had as a child and your overall self esteem/self view. Have you done anything to address this, it sounds like trauma for sure, from different experiences. I'm not a medical professional and will not proclaim this as medical advice but from what you've said, it sounds like these entities are drawn to your suffering and seem to be feeding from it.

The demon you saw, whatever it was that seemed to be looking into your soul, reading your thoughts is a good example of this. This also dovetails with the story of the entity that scared you and your friend that night, scratching on the walls, banging on the door etc. It was purposely trying to elicit fear in you to feed from.

From what I've gathered and read, 'sleep paralysis' always accompanies the sightings of entities. This is dismissed as part of the experience, from the body not waking up as fast as the mind. I believe the paralysis is caused due to these 'entities' interference in your body's electrical field as they draw energy from you. It inspires the nightmares as your mind/body tries to alert you to the problem. When a person awakes, paralyzed as it were and seeing these entities around them, they actually are catching them in the act of drawing a persons energy, their emotions from them. After some effort the person usually regains control of their body and the entities usually vanish at the same time.

I would venture that these entities that are drawn to you and attach are after your pain and suffering, they feed off it and do what they can to inspire more of it in you.

Your solution if that is the case, would be to address the trauma, and the other issues, to heal them. If you are no longer in suffering, no longer plagued by emotional distress, you cut off their food supply so to speak. They will lose interest in you. Cleansing and clearing will only go so far, as long as you have these unresolved issues, they will keep coming back.

As a side note, it sounds as if you also have some kind of guardian or guardians who are also trying to look out for you as well.

You are strong and seem to be quite resilient, I am confident you will overcome this. Hopefully this helps, good luck!
Rajine (14 stories) (266 posts)
 
4 weeks ago (2021-08-25)
Hi TheSweetDevil23

Have you ever tried finding out the reason for your sleep paralysis? Either spiritual or medical?

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