On 16th July 2015, at 9:21am, I lost my 19 year old cat, Fifi to multiple organ failure due to old age. He was my best friend, and companion since I was 3 years old. His previous owners abandoned him, and my dad took him in when he was probably a year old. He came to us when he was fully grown, so I am estimating he's 19, could even be 20, had him for 18 years though. He was unlike any other cats I've ever had or seen. He understood everything we said, came to us when we called him, waited for me to come back from school and for my parents to come back from work, by the door.
When I was a kid, my parents had left me home and gone out to get some groceries. I fell from the bed and my nose started to bleed. He noticed it immediately and went to my grand mom's house through the cat flap. She stays close by, a few houses away. He started yelling immediately when he reached there and urged her to follow him home. She did, and when she got home she was shocked to find me on the ground, hurt. He saved my life.
He would sit with me when I used to stay up late, studying for exams. He cuddled me when I was sad or crying and growled at my mom if she ever shouted at me, when I did something wrong.
He got along with all the other cats in the house, and also with my neighbours dog. He never even attacked any squirrels or birds that came to our yard, like my other cat, Snaggle puss (who we lost to CRF in October last year, she was 18) who used to love killing them, and chasing away any cats that came into her territory. He never fought with, or harmed or scratched anyone.
The past few days were really hard, over some days we found out his heart was enlarged. His kidneys were failing. He started gasping for air even if he walked from one end of the sofa to the other. So we would pick him up and put him the litter tray. My vet would come everyday to see him and treat him. Over the next few days, the panting got worse, he would pant even after eating food and drinking water. He was in no mood to eat, but we would feed him forcefully by yelling at him or coaxing him. He would eat to keep us happy and not because he wanted to. In the 18 years that we had him he had never once peed or pooped where he shouldn't have.
He lost the ability to move his hind legs suddenly one night. He tried to get down from the bed and fell when he tried to use the litter box. We got it up on the bed and put him in it so he could pass his stools, he wasn't even able to stand. His hind legs couldn't move. It was 2 in the night, and we called our vet, she came over immediately. Bless her soul for always being there for us whenever he needed her. She said the blood supply to his hind legs had been cut off. She gave him a steroid injection, so that he would feel a little better. When she left, My mom held his front and I held his back and we tried to get him to pass stools. He couldn't and he was still gasping for air.
My mom told him it was okay, and he could pee on the bed. He didn't. The entire night he gasped for air continuously, panting like a dog. My dad got an oxygen cylinder, to help him breathe, but it didn't really help.
He was trying to get up, but he kept falling over. He tried to get up at least fifty times that night. We were trying to not get him to do that. But he wasn't listening, the activity caused him to pant more.
We called the vet in the morning, again. My dad said he didn't care about the money, he wanted her to do something to make him alright, at least to cure his breathing problem even if he couldn't stand, it was okay. We could still take care of him. She said she couldn't do anything and she had tried everything she could do.
We took a call to put him to sleep cause he was suffering. His eyes were telling me that he didn't want to leave us and go. It was a hard call and we had to take it. We were there with him when she administered the first shot of anesthesia, the second one wasn't even needed. He passed with it. But she gave it anyway cause that was the routine procedure. The entire day was really hard and me, my mom and dad all broke down and cried. Even my vet got really emotional and cried with us. She had treated him since he was a young cat. We cremated him, with flowers and his favourite blanket.
The ashes are in an urn, which is kept in a glass cupboard in my bed room. I have another 1 year old cat, Alex who was very attached to him, we got him in February this year, he was again possibly abandoned and had multiple wounds, which we got treated and he was neutered and we took him in. Alex would always sleep by Fifi's side and play with him when he was alright. He would watch us giving him his medicines, he came and sat by his side even when he was sick, sniffed his butt, licked his head. He's really mellowed down over the past few days, normally he's very jumpy and hyper and keeps running around all over the house. Maybe he knew what was going to happen. He searched for him in all his spots before making a sad face and sleeping on the bed after we got home from cremating him.
Last night when I was sleeping, I turned towards the glass cupboard where we have kept the urn of ashes, it's like a cupboard with glass doors, you can see through the glass inside the cupboard. I saw Fifi sitting there and looking at me. He was young and healthy again, unlike how he had become over the past few days. I thought I was imagining it, so I blinked and looked there again. I was wide awake, it wasn't a dream. He was still there, looking at me. I must've dozed off after 30 minutes or so. When I woke up I checked again, in the morning. No he wasn't there then. My 1 year old cat, Alex constantly stands on two paws and stares at the cupboard. Also I've been hearing sounds of his nails on the floor, when Alex was in bed with me. So I know it wasn't him.
I don't have any other cats now. Just Alex. Do you think he's still around? I miss him immensely and want to communicate with him. We are Hindus (Indians) and my dad wants me to immerse the ashes into the sea, it's a belief that a dead person's soul is free to move on, only after the ashes are scattered. Am I holding him back? I just want to see him again. He was the most loving, and beautiful cat I've ever had, I've been around many, trust me. And I don't think I will ever find any one like him, He loved us unconditionally without expecting anything in return. I don't think I will ever get over his loss, it's like a part of me died, along with him. I also lost my 18 year old cat, Snaggle puss to CRF last year in October, like I mentioned before. Fifi and she grew up together. She came to us first and he, a few months later. And they even left us in the same sequence. They were very attached to each other. Just goes to show how they couldn't live without each other for a long time too.
Sharing some pictures of both my babies, Fifi is the grey Tom, and Snaggle puss is the ginger cat.