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Goodby And I Hope You Guys Get Along


This happened in 2010 along in May, so maybe that's why I'm thinking of it now. Two good friends of mine died just three days apart, and I was devastated for a long time over it. Just to go into some background about both of them let me explain them.

The first one was my friend Loren, who had been fighting cancer for years. She was a beautiful strong lady, an accountant, so she had a brilliant mind in this super-model body which she loved to play peoples stereotypes with. Really sweet, ready to give her last, and ready to speak her mind. So that last bit, caused a little friction, because I'll speak my mind too. But that was OK because we could communicate, (like fencing sometimes) so we got along.

Well, now, the other one was the alcoholic man that I used to live with, (who I mentioned in my first story.) He eventually left me for another woman who was also an alcoholic, took up his crack addiction again, and really became a mess. So he periodically got kicked out from one chicks place, lived on the street, and moved into another. But he would stop by and say hi. We stayed friends. So I was around when he slowly but painfully went into peritonitis several times, got jaundice, and died from sclerosis of the liver. Word to all young alcoholics, it won't be fun, find a different substance. His mind was going, which had a kind of mellowing affect. At the time of his death, he was becoming a rather nice child, and a lot of us were torn up over mourning the man who could have been, and the man that was.

So... Cleg was homeless at the time of his death, and he was not an American citizen. This made a lot of unbelievable drama with the government, the hospital, the cops, his family we couldn't locate, on top of everything else, and my friend Loren passing. It made for a week of sorrow and memorial services. When they were all done with, (as it turned out, Cleg passed first, but had a service last, with a memorial party that was also a fundraiser for the homeless services in the area.) I trudged home in the wee hours of the morning and crashed in bed hoping the world wouldn't exist again for another year.

No sooner had I shut my eyes when I felt an odd presence at the head of my bed waving it's arms in the air frantically, as if they were upset. Then I felt another presence, even felt this electricity by my bedside, and in my mind I could see Cleg looking down to stroke my back. Not an altogether unpleasant experience. And I just knew the other one was my friend Loren yelling at him to stay away. She was always joking threatening me if I took him back she'd have to kick my arsh or something. You know. Really, it was an anti-climax to this horrendous week. There they were arguing. I thought, wow they don't change personalities when they pass. She's telling him what for and he's totally ignoring her, telling me he loved me, it was just those addictions. Had they been walking along together like this the whole week? Should they stay here? Or should they go to the light? Oh my!

I said to Cleg, "I still love you but this isn't going to work now either." And to Loren, "you know I miss you, and I appreciate what you're doing, but both of you should go to the light, you'll like it there."

What do you think?

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Swimsinfire, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Swimsinfire (11 stories) (556 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-30)
You know what, I do often feel like he's wanting to give assistance mentally. He actually was very gifted in a lot of ways (minus the alcohol.) It seemed so benevolent. Odd. I do a lot of praying nowdays. Thanks for the condolences. Yes "There's so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us."
Amihet (5 stories) (94 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-29)
Dear Swimsinfire: What a lovely story, I have also heard that our true personality lives on after our passing. I am so glad that they decided to move forward into the light to a better place. Since then have they visited you at all? I am sorry for your loss. Take Care.
notjustme (19 stories) (852 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-29)
this made me cry. Thank you for your beautiful story. Because we live in a world full of judgement, and just because someone has made many wrong decisions, they are in the end, human. We are all capable of love and being loved. Sorry for your losses. God bless you
Swimsinfire (11 stories) (556 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-28)
Val, no kidding! And it gives a whole knew light to what we have to look forward to in the after life, right? It's totally her. She was a country woman and put huge value on friends and family. I like to think it was like that too.
valkricry (49 stories) (3276 posts) mod
11 years ago (2013-05-27)
Dear Swimsinfire,
I hope they went to the light. You know, it popped into my head that maybe they'd come just to say goodbye, but then Cleg may have thought he was going to stay, so Loren gave him what-for. I could see this as a plot for a short story or something. (Not casting doubt here, but you have to admit it would make a real interesting storyline.)
Thanks for sharing it with us. 😊
Swimsinfire (11 stories) (556 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-27)
Well I could totally see the ex doing this to be funny! But my friend Loren was another matter. She had a pretty good sense of humor but, she use to hate it when my son told her about his being violent to me, and she was ready to have your back through hell if need be, so I don't know. Could be.
Seraphina (7 stories) (147 posts)
11 years ago (2013-05-25)
Hi, Swimsinfire. Thanks for writing another fascinating story about your experiences.
After mourning both of your friends' deaths so intensely, you were exhausted emotionally. You certainly didn't need to be caught in the middle of a "spirited" argument! Is it possible that they were trying to provide a little comic relief? And did they ever visit again?

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