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My Cousin Attended Her Own Funeral

 

The funeral of my cousin was really strange... Especially when I saw her standing in the corner of the church.

The church was full of family and we just sat listening to the service and to others saying their goodbyes. It was nothing extravagant, but it was nice. I get distracted really easily because of my dyspraxia, so I was looking around and I saw her in the corner, looking at her own coffin.

I stared. I wasn't scared or shocked, I just didn't want to look away. My cousin, who had died a few weeks ago was standing right there. I won't tell you how she died, but it wasn't of natural causes.

I heard my name be called from the front, signaling that it was my turn to say a few words. I got up and went to the front. When I looked back, she was gone. I almost wanted to cry, the only time I would see her again, and I turned my back on her.

I said my bit, as well as I could through the tears and went back to my seat. When the service was over, we all went outside. I saw her again, standing by the trees. I walked to her as quietly and casually as I could. I stood in front of her. She smiled at me and told me she wasn't in pain anymore. I tried not to cry at that statement. I knew which sort of pain she meant and who caused it.

I nodded as I tried not to cry, and she vanished.

I have seen her around. I stayed at her house to sort things out. Her boyfriend keeps seeing her too. He's creeped out by it, but I'm just happy to see her. The loss isn't so bad if the person you miss keeps turning up to comfort you.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Oceana, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
 
4 days ago (2020-10-18)
I didn't either and I find it hurtful and rude.
There is no need for it.
PoliexterLy (2 stories) (80 posts)
+3
4 days ago (2020-10-18)
Wow... Didn't see that coming.
I must say that there's always something happening in yourghoststories 😆
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
 
5 days ago (2020-10-17)
What?
You are not Sophie.
Don't you dare pretend to be someone you're not.
Sophie closed her account because she wanted to, I never told her to do that.
sophiethunder1 (guest)
+3
5 days ago (2020-10-17)
I kept thinking about making this account or not but I had to because I want everyone to know! Oceana you told me to close my account and that's it but I didn't think you would kill me off and say that I was going mad! Now I'm upset because you're telling all these people things that I didn't even go through. I thought we were in this together but now I see we're not: (I didn't commit suicide, I am alive and well. Reading these comments just made me feel like I had to say these things
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
 
2 weeks ago (2020-10-07)
valkricry
I'm sorry about your loss.
I'm probably mincing my words again. She was depressed because she thought people were against her. That's what she lead me to believe.
I'll tell her next time I see her.

To everyone, thanks for the help.
valkricry (45 stories) (3098 posts) mod
+6
2 weeks ago (2020-10-07)
I have debated with myself over and over about commenting on this particular thread, as it hits a bit close to home for me. I lost my son to suicide, so I've some firsthand experience with it.
Oceana, I would urge you to get some counseling if you haven't already. There's no shame in getting help in dealing with grief, or even life in general.
Personally, I don't believe that all spirits stay for awhile out of an inability to move on, but rather out of choice; to give those they've left behind some comfort and closure, letting them know that they're ok now. Maybe even to be sure we're okay.
Think about it, " She smiled at me and told me she wasn't in pain anymore." Does that sound like someone seeking justice/revenge, who isn't at peace?
PoliexterLy is correct, the police ask a lot of questions, I know my own home was treated as a homicide scene - without the yellow tape. Computers were looked at for files, and any groups/forums he belonged to, as well as any comments he made or were made to him.
From your own comments, Oceana, I think you may have mistyped when you said she was a victim of cyber-bullying. Sounds to me more like she suffered depression, and a side effect of that can be a bit of paranoia. Not in the sense of everyone is out to 'get you', but of being attacked from want of a better word. It's usually reflected in their off-line life as well ('no body likes me' type thinking or 'I'm just a screw up'). This paranoia can take even innocent comments and twist them.
Just know, that suicide is a choice and one she made. There is no one to blame for her death, unless there was actual (cyber) bullying taking place which would have only exasperated an already existing condition. And even if she had been under doctor's care there's no guarantee of a different outcome. Next time you see her, tell her you love her enough to let her go. That could be all she needs to hear.
Shabtslover (11 posts)
+2
2 weeks ago (2020-10-07)
Oceana, I think why it matters how or why she died is that yes this is your experience but judging from the bond you guys had in the story I am assuming you would want her to move on and for that I think it's very important that you know what is stopping her from doing that and try to help her so for that reason it is very important to know what caused her death and what would help her to gain peace
PoliexterLy (2 stories) (80 posts)
+6
2 weeks ago (2020-10-06)
Oceana,
You say it was cyberbullying tho and that her TORMENTERS were still at large... But now you're saying she was going mad anyway so it wasn't that? 😨
Js you shouldn't make large accusations like that about people. Especially when involving a dead person
Lorenzo (3 stories) (21 posts)
+2
2 weeks ago (2020-10-06)
I wonder if there's a way to help her move on. It's sad otherwise.
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
-2
2 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
Anyway, I don't see it matters why she died, this is just my experience of seeing her after death.
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
-1
2 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
She was going mad in the weeks before. Maybe she had something she felt she couldn't talk about.
She was upset about comments, not necessarily here, but she felt bullied.
PoliexterLy (2 stories) (80 posts)
+3
3 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
Oceana,
I'm sure your cousin had some underlying issues that had nothing to do with comments on this website. Don't get me wrong but I don't think anyone would decide to off themselves right away like that...
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
-4
3 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
Yeah, it's a bit weird but she took the comments to heart. She was already down anyway and just felt like a few meaningless comments were against her.
The police wouldn't have seen any cyberbullying, because it was just in her view that the comments were against her. She thought people were against her and they weren't actually.
Melda (10 stories) (1322 posts)
+3
3 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
Oceana - Please accept my condolences.

It seems that this is a suicide case and that cyber bullying was the cause. Is this sophiethunder? Please let us know, there is no reason to hide it from us.

Regards, Melda
PoliexterLy (2 stories) (80 posts)
+6
3 weeks ago (2020-10-05)
This may seem unsensitive and harsh but, if you ask me, some points in your story are hard to understand:

Since your cousin's death was ruled a suicide, wouldn't that automatically involve the police and a criminal investigation?

From https://www.samh.org.uk/documents/After_a_suicide.pdf

The Police.

When a body is found under circumstances which may indicate suicide, the police will:
* retain any item that has an obvious connection with the death...
* examine any notes or letters that the person has left which indicate a suicidal intention
* make enquiries to establish the person's state of mind before their death...
Police enquiries can take many different forms and often involve interviewing family, friends and colleagues as potential witnesses

Your own words:

I wonder why she can't move on. Maybe she can't be at peace while her tormentors are still at large.
I can't do that. I have no evidence. It was just online bullying, really, but it drove her over ther edge.
Yes, I guess they could. Maybe I should report it. It might make her at peace.

I don't understand your reluctance to talk to the police if, to begin with, they should have been aware of the reasons that pushed your cousin to take her life and already investigating; secondly, if the police interviewed you and her closest family members and boyfriend, it was your and their duty to inform them about the problem.

She smiled at me and told me she wasn't in pain anymore... I knew which sort of pain she meant and who caused it.
Did you advice her to look for any legal and/or psychological help? Since you know who was tormenting her, wouldn't providing this information to the police be enough to get a warrant to seize their computer?
Lorenzo (3 stories) (21 posts)
+2
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
I'm sorry for your loss. Maybe she didn't want you to be upset.
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
 
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
Yes, I guess they could. Maybe I should report it. It might make her at peace.
PoliexterLy (2 stories) (80 posts)
+6
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
Hi oceana,
From your comment, if your cousin was cyber bullied online then that would stay there forever. Police could build a case upon that...
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
 
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
I can't do that. I have no evidence. It was just online bullying, really, but it drove her over ther edge.
TravisCannabis (23 posts)
+3
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
Ohhh bro that's so sad! 😭
Maybe she wants you to go to the police and bring those POS to justice. 😭
Sleeping-with-steve (8 stories) (454 posts)
+2
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
Hello Oceana,
You said you saw your cousin standing in the corner of the church looking at her coffin, and that she died a few weeks ago but you can't say how... Maybe she came to tell you and others what happened and how she died.
This must be very difficult for you. Seeing your cousin must be comforting, but, it must be hard for your cousin not being able to move onto the next realm.

I'm so sorry for your loss. 😭 🙄

My thoughts are with you.
SWS. 😘
LightMight (3 stories) (62 posts)
+3
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
Hi Oceana,

I'm so sorry that you lost your cousin so recently; your story is very heart-wrenching. It sounds like you were close during her life, and it does sound as though she is trying to reassure you that she is alright now. I think it's wonderful that you are so open to her visits with you, and that you aren't afraid.

In your last sentence, you mentioned that "the loss isn't so bad if the person you miss keeps turning up to comfort you" - that actually gave me a slight chill. My daughter stated nearly your same exact words to me, after she told me about her father visiting her at our home (he's been deceased for months now). My feeling is that people who experience visits and sightings, are very fortunate to have such an apparently strong bond with their loved ones.

Take Care, ❤ LightMight
Oceana (9 stories) (39 posts)
+1
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
I wonder why she can't move on. Maybe she can't be at peace while her tormentors are still at large.
Shabtslover (11 posts)
+3
3 weeks ago (2020-10-04)
I agree with Maria, it's really sad that she couldn't move on and I hope whoever caused her pain gets what they deserve but more than that I hope she gets to be at peace
Lealeigh (5 stories) (496 posts)
+2
3 weeks ago (2020-10-03)
Oceana,

I think I would be more upset if I kept seeing her. You said:

"The loss isn't so bad if the person you miss keeps turning up to comfort you."

I think that her inability to move on from this Earth would be an indication that she is not at peace. That would hurt worse than her absence.

- Maria

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