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Please Send Good Thoughts

 

This may be the most believable story you will ever read. Unless this sickness takes me before, I will, on the 31st of this month, at 7:00 a.m. Be undergoing a nine to twelve hour surgery. I feel it may be unlikely that I will survive and that is ok, but I am much saddened it will leave my husband of forty-eight years, alone, but I will finally find answers.

I ask of you, if you will, please say a prayer of your faith, or just whisper, perhaps good thoughts. I have felt so much kindness from many of you on YGS. Your prayers, thoughts, and kindness will join all the other interesting people, sending the same, from far and near. Like you, I have never had the pleasure of meeting many of these other wonderful people other then from on line connections. Added to that will be the many people I have known through life.

I will try in a gentle way to reach out to you, or if I survive I will write as soon as possible, even if I am unable until October. Perhaps I would be able to convey what I might learn. So many maybes.

What I can tell you is, I have had several visitation dreams in the past week, dreams that woke me, and I wrote them down, before going back to sleep. A couple of them I don't remember ever knowing them, in this life. For me, this is a warning, I think. But could be wrong. I also have had flashes of people going by, as I lay going to sleep. It is like they are walking on a sidewalk and looking at me, as they pass. I do not know them.

The Cowboy truck driver is visiting again, he has often been sitting on my couch, or at a kitchen chair, when I, in thirst at night, head to the fridge for a drink. I never took the time to write about him, he was killed on the road, around 1950ish, that my house is on. I have seen him, now and again, these past 39 years living here, but he has resisted all my efforts to help in going to the light. He once indicated no one was waiting for him.

I am sorry the other material I have had in mind to share will never get written, or maybe it will! Thanks to all at YGS.

My Love, and my best to you,

Jan

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by yourghoststories.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, msforgetmenott, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

MysticFrance (5 stories) (95 posts)
 
6 years ago (2019-01-04)
Hi Jan,

I hope you are still in good health (or at least, better than before). Happy New Year! Is the man still visiting you?

Regards.
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
+1
6 years ago (2018-10-15)
Tweed - Thank you. I really needed that reassurance. Sometimes, particularly in a case such as Jan's, I thought I might create the impression that I consider her suffering irrelevant. Not because I'm of the opinion that everybody thinks "oh I wonder what Melda will say". They probably won't notice whether I comment or not.

The point is that I do care, as I know do you. At the end of the day I had to let her know this and I feel better for it. Also, she knows how many people she has touched and she deserves to know that.

Regards, Melda
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
+1
6 years ago (2018-10-15)
Jan - Thank you so much for responding to me once again.

I believe that the strong, smart, beautiful women had a goal to fulfill during their (sometimes) short existence on this earth. That is what I believe, so I'll leave it at that.

What has always amazed me is that so many cancer sufferers accept their fate gracefully. Perhaps they only appear to, to attempt to assist those close to them to also accept and move on? I don't know.

Your father seems to have been a very good man, loyal to his lost love and he obviously loved you very much and did his best for you. All you can ever expect from another human is their best.

Your mom saw you placing those lilacs at her grave and I'm sure her spirit rejoiced ❤

I wish for you and your family all the best of everything that this life and the hereafter has to offer.

Sincerely, Denise (Melda)
Tweed (36 stories) (2529 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-10-10)
Jan, you're back home, brilliant! And Welcome back!

I have a lot of catching up to do with YGS, so forgive me, I'm underread. A misappropriation of the word, I know.

Hope you don't mind, I want to say something to Melda.

Melda, you're definitely not alone in avoiding threads. I do this ALL THE TIME! For the avoidance of pain. I also hope that my silence goes unnoticed at best, or that people won't think me rude. So don't feel guilty about avoiding threads. It's better to speak from the heart than to force something out of politeness anyway. Honesty's always best. Oh and of course there are some threads that I move on from because I find them distasteful, or fanciful. I don't mean them.

Jan, your resilience is astounding. I'm sure everyone's already said this on this thread, but it's true! Also, please let Brian know, if he doesn't check back here often, that his submission left me speechless, in a profound way. I literally didn't know what to type so I didn't type anything. But it really made me think about things. I'm glad he felt comfortable to share his experience.

Welcome back Kotter!
Haven (20 stories) (307 posts)
 
6 years ago (2018-10-10)
Hi, Jan - Oh, it was totally worth it! 😊 ❤

Hope you're doing well.
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+1
6 years ago (2018-10-09)
Oh Haven, I am sorry.
I was in a sad mood this morning, I guess it showed. I am sorry I messed up your make up, but was the subject worth it?
❤ 😊
My Best,
Jan
Haven (20 stories) (307 posts)
+1
6 years ago (2018-10-09)
Wow, Jan. Now my makeup is ruined, I have mascara running down my face. 😢

That was definitely devotion your dad had for your mom. I bet they are finally together again. No doubt your parents were soul mates, love like that makes me just a tiny bit envious (sigh). 😊
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-10-09)
Hello Melda,

You brought tears to my eyes! Those memories, (nightmare years), are never forgotten. I cry, not for myself, but for the strong, smart, beautiful women, who never reached their full potential. How much they missed, and are missed.

I wish science would stop dragging their feet! Wonderful lives are left shortened, memories never to be enjoyed.

I was thinking about the devotion my Dad displayed, for the rest of his life. I was not allowed to throw an item from the cupboard if it had been my Mom's purchase, even in spices or seasoning. He never dated another woman although he lived another forty years.

On the year I was graduating from High School, the time blended with our Memorial Day. This is a remembering day for those lost to us by War or for any other reason.

So for some forgotten reason I was up at 5 am, startling my Dad before his farm chores. He walked up the stairs with a shinny pail filled with lilacs that he had picked from our old cellar hole garden. He explained it had been his secret, each May, that he place her favorite flower at my Mom's stone.

For my Mom, He suggested, as it was to be my Graduating day, perhaps I would like the honor.

In years following, I quietly made a stop at my Mom's grave, to place my own flowers near the lilacs. Until His death my Graduation Day was the only time I had the honor of placing the lilacs. That was devotion.

My best,
Jan
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-10-01)
Jan - Thanks so much for your response. Somehow I missed it, hence my late reply.

It does seem that huge strides are being made in combating cancer, which is wonderful because not so long ago the very word was a death sentence. Very thought provoking that a case study which was supposed to have spanned a five-year period ended halfway through. How devastating for those that developed the cancer.

It is soul destroying for families who have to cope with this horrible disease. It really is emotional turmoil. I remember specifically my mother and later my sister constantly apologised to us for what they were putting us through. Can you believe it?! We were devastated by what they had to endure and they felt sorry for us. Well I don't think I need to explain that to you, I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking about.

You have been very much on my mind, so a few days ago I decided to read some of your submissions, only to realise that I'd already read all of them quite a while ago. This reminded me that you had lost your mother at a young age and were raised by your father for much of your young life. I must say you had some amazing experiences. So, I've read all your stories twice and enjoyed them just as much the second time around 😊

Jan I wish you and your family strength, health and happiness and you are on my list of special people to whom I send out my positive thoughts and my own special prayers ❤

I wish you the best that life has to offer.

Melda 😘
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+1
6 years ago (2018-09-27)
Thank you Haven,
I am taking one day at a time.
So nice of you to think of me.

Jan ❤
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+3
6 years ago (2018-09-26)
Hello Melda,
I have read your message to my Son, and wished to respond.
I lost my Mother when I was nine years old. As an adult I began to put two and two together. Her Sister and Cousin later died as well.
In the nineties I was fortunate to be asked to join in a Breast Cancer study. There were 16, 000 of us in the USA and in Canada. This study was to run for 5 years, 50% had the real pill and 50% did not.
Less than 2 and 1/2 years later the study was stopped, as the unfortunate people that had the fake pill were getting breast cancer. This pill was tomoxafen. They have progressed greatly from this time.
There is a link, and I am proof. I have great trust in science, it may be to late for me but a cure for cancer is close.
I know it is hard for family members, and I felt your pain through your words. I am sorry, Melda for your loss.
My Best to you,
Jan
Haven (20 stories) (307 posts)
+3
6 years ago (2018-09-26)
Welcome back, Jan! So glad to know you're getting better. Can't wait to read about your experiences at the hospital. ❤
CuriousDee (8 stories) (631 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-26)
Oh Jan, no thanks necessary! We truly wish and want the best for you! Thank you for keeping us updated!

❤ ❤ ❤
Dee
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+4
6 years ago (2018-09-26)
Thank you all so very much for all that you wrote, thought, prayed, and cared. Because of you and other kind people, I am here alive and happy.
Our future is always uncertain, yours and mine. It is wonderful to know people we have never met but have shared thoughts with can be as kind as you have. Because of you and others like you, I am home and will be better as the days pass.
Thank you,
Jan
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-19)
Brian - I've lost a number of family members as a result of cancer, including my own mother, which has actually kept me off of this thread. It's a painful subject for me. Selfish, I know.

I have never interacted with your mom through YGS at all but I have come across her name several times and she sounds like a wonderful lady.

I wish strength to not only her but also to the rest of the family members. You all need it!

I do have one family member who recovered from cancer of the lymph glands about 18 years ago. There's always hope 😊 ❤

Regards, Melda
Aporetic (5 stories) (125 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-19)
Thank you, Brian, for the latest update on your mother - the news warms my heart.

Still sending heaps of healing, positive energy to her and the family.

Stay well and I look forward to seeing a message from our Jan soon.

With warm regards.
Apo
RCRuskin (9 stories) (847 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-18)
Hi again, Brian.

No news is, I'm hoping, good news. I hope your mom is making continued improvement.

Please let us know something again soon?
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
 
6 years ago (2018-09-16)
RCRuskin - That's how I understood it. The points which you had awarded to others were removed.

Regards, Melda
RCRuskin (9 stories) (847 posts)
 
6 years ago (2018-09-15)
Melda, hi. I wasn't clear; my bad. Comments I had voted on showed that I had not voted on them, though it showed them voted on earlier.

Votes I cast disappeared, not votes cast for me, or against me.
Melda (10 stories) (1363 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-15)
RCRuskin - Don't be surprised by the disappearance of the votes. The naysayer is on the prowl again. It is now 18:30 in South Africa and about half an hour ago I was just about to log off from my computer.

I haven't always checked up on karma points but since so many people have been bashed recently, including myself, over the past two weeks I have been checking every day to see whether the nasties are around or whether I might have said something inappropriate.

When I checked half an hour ago I noticed that within minutes of my last comment I had received two minus votes. I don't believe my comments necessitated them but who am I to judge. Both you and I received minus points on our comments on The Cereal Box. Lady-glow and I received minus points on our comments on Spirits in New Home.

I am going to reverse your and lady-glow's minus points. At least some bored, jealous little bunny is having itself some fun.

Regards, Melda
RCRuskin (9 stories) (847 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-14)
Well, that was weird. I just popped in to look at this story and saw that two comments I upvoted did not show the votes, though they did earlier today.
MrsRizzo2429 (4 stories) (93 posts)
+3
6 years ago (2018-09-12)
I wish your mother a speedy recovery. ❤️Good thoughts are being sent your way!
spiritwaiting (42 stories) (843 posts)
+6
6 years ago (2018-09-11)
Jan,

I know I don't comment on here much anymore, but I do read just about every experience that's posted.

Im not sure if you will read this anytime soon, but when your in recovery I hope you see all these amazing,beautiful,true genuine and caring words from everyone here.

I am sending prayers, and good energy to you and your family!

Brian,
Thank you for writing on your mother's behalf I think it relieved some of the worries!

Hope to hear from you and your mother very very soon!

Sincerely
Spiritwaiting
CuriousDee (8 stories) (631 posts)
+5
6 years ago (2018-09-11)
Hi Brian,

Thank you so much for the updates on your mother. We've been on pins and needles. I'm relieved to hear she is ok and happy that she knows her YGS family is thinking of her and sending love. ❤ Please share your story when you have time.

Sending love, light, healing and big hugs to Jan, your father and you ❤

Dee
BeautInside (3 stories) (326 posts)
+4
6 years ago (2018-09-11)
Hi Brian,

Thank you sooo much for updating us!
Give her a hug as big as the planet Earth for me, will you?

Jan is force of nature, it might take time but she will be okay! 😉

Take care and please keep us updated. ❤
Sleeping-with-steve (guest)
+1
6 years ago (2018-09-10)
Hello Brian,

I don't know your mum but I'm glad everything went OK with her first stage.

I wish her well.

Thank you for keeping everyone posted.

😘 ❤ 😘
RCRuskin (9 stories) (847 posts)
+3
6 years ago (2018-09-10)
Thank you for the update, but... I think I misread something? You're thanking us that your mother is our friend? The honor is really hours and we thank you. And your mother especially.

P.s. I have this post in my news folder of favorites so when I check the morning news, I also get an update on how Jan is doing. 😁
tace (37 posts)
+2
6 years ago (2018-09-10)
Best wishes to your Mom Brian, so good of you to let us know. I hope Jan recovers quickly and feels better soon ❤
lady-glow (16 stories) (3186 posts)
+3
6 years ago (2018-09-10)
Hi Brian - the way to recovery is a long one. It's good to know the first step went well.

Thanks for the update.

Give Jan a big hug from me. ❤
msforgetmenott (17 stories) (316 posts)
+7
6 years ago (2018-09-10)
Hi all,
This is Brian again with an up date on Jan, my mother.
She is able to sit up and talk a bit. Has a long ways to go. You all should know she mentioned her on line friends, and requested me to keep in contact.
Unfortunately, there is many chemo treatments ahead. She has come a long ways already though.
Thank you all for her friendship,
Brian

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